What do you call an antelope that never gives up?

A cantaloupe.

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/I_am_AmandaTron
πŸ“…︎ May 10
🚨︎ report
Did you hear about the stampede of large antelope?

I was gnus to me too.

πŸ‘︎ 6
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Apr 01
🚨︎ report
TIL about a truck full of antelopes that stopped suddenly on the freeway and caused a 15 car pile up.

it was braking gnus.

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Apr 23
🚨︎ report
I just learnt that the Wildebeest is actually an antelope.

That's gnus to me.

πŸ‘︎ 10
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Bigfoothobbit
πŸ“…︎ Jan 15
🚨︎ report
Did you know the average mountain antelope can jump higher than a house?

This is mainly due to it's incredibly strong hind legs and the fact houses can't jump.

πŸ‘︎ 10
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/FrightinglyPunny
πŸ“…︎ Aug 10 2019
🚨︎ report
there is a species of Antelope that is capable of jumping higher than a house.

this is due to its powerful hind legs and the fact that a house cannot jump.

πŸ‘︎ 15
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Valdagast
πŸ“…︎ Jun 23 2019
🚨︎ report
Do you want to see an antelope?

Just look over there, she's climbing down the ladder to her boyfriend's car!

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/KIgaming
πŸ“…︎ Jul 16 2019
🚨︎ report
TIL antelope can jump higher than the average house.

It's because of their really strong back legs. Also because houses can't jump

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/rooflespoofles
πŸ“…︎ Nov 11 2018
🚨︎ report
Did you know there's an antelope in Africa that can jump higher than a house?

Houses can't jump.

πŸ‘︎ 18
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/bentnotbroken96
πŸ“…︎ Jan 21 2018
🚨︎ report
Why did the king of the jungle say he was an antelope?

Because he was a lion.

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Life_in_Bones
πŸ“…︎ May 29 2018
🚨︎ report
Want To See an Antelope? [X-Post from /r/calvinandhobbes]
πŸ‘︎ 183
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/FA1R_ENOUGH
πŸ“…︎ Jul 22 2013
🚨︎ report
What do you call an interfering antelope?

An anterloper

πŸ‘︎ 6
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/ananke2989
πŸ“…︎ Jun 16 2016
🚨︎ report
Genies work differently than you think they do (long joke)

A man walks into a peculiar bar. There’s a small man no more than a foot tall playing the piano in the corner, men with horns and many other odd things. He noticed people huddled around a table. He walks up to the bartender and asks β€œwhat’s going on over there?” The bartender replies,” oh it’s a game, if you win a genie will grant you one wish”. β€œReally! Can I wish for anything!?” The Bartender says β€œyup just be specific and enunciate. Trust me” β€œHow do you play!?” The man asks excitedly β€œIt’s simple if you roll snake eyes you win. Everyone gets one chance and no more” The man runs over the the table and waits his turn. Once he gets up to the table he rolls snake eyes, he’s ecstatic. A genie appears over the table and says”you get one wish” The man is jumping up and down in excitement. He can hear the bartender saying something but ignores him and says”I want a million bucks!” The genie says”done” snaps his fingers and disappears. In that moment one million male deer, elk, antelope

... keep reading on reddit ➑

πŸ‘︎ 9
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/SirOrville
πŸ“…︎ Jun 20 2019
🚨︎ report
What do you get when two ants run away together?

An antelope!

πŸ‘︎ 6
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/SadderHoshi
πŸ“…︎ May 31 2019
🚨︎ report
Just watched a movie about two ants that ran away to get married

It was called Antelope

Gonna watch the sequel next where they aren't able to get married, it's called Cantelope

πŸ‘︎ 28
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/PsiVolt
πŸ“…︎ Aug 04 2018
🚨︎ report
This morning, my wife asked me to look up a song on youtube called 'Dear life'...

I said "Is that the remix to 'antelope life'?"

She rolled her eyes, groaned and then laughed.

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/BruceBannersDick
πŸ“…︎ Feb 12 2017
🚨︎ report
Cantaloupe

Got my girlfriend with this one late last night.

Me: "What's the other name for cantaloupe?"

GF: "Cantaloupe. The animal is called Antelope."

Me: "Cantaloupe is also the word used for someone who can't run away and get married."

GF: "Who's running away and getting married!?"

Me: "Not me, because I can't elope."

I laughed hysterically at my own joke, she laughed and also hit me (playfully). But she was also not impressed.

(Rock Melon was what I was thinking of.)

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Erebus495
πŸ“…︎ Mar 12 2015
🚨︎ report

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.