What has four legs, green fur, and if it drops on you from a tree, will kill you?
A pool table
I'm going to open a guanaco fur sleepwear warehouse with my mom.
We'll call it "Mama's Llama Pajamarama"
What did the rabbit use to make his fur nice and shiny?
Hare tonic (hat tip Bugs Bunny)
What kind of fur can irritate your skin?
Sulfur.
I accidentally took my cats meds this morning...
Don't ask meow.
Here's an interesting story of how I have a black thick furred animal with short tail that walks on soles of its feet
The story is long ,bear with me
People were creeped out by the backwards version of Fur Elise coming out of Beethoven's grave
Turns out he was just decomposing.
A hare, a bunny and a rabbi walk into a blood donation camp
The rabbi says I'm probably a Type O
My son grows a lot of fur and manufactures products of art or craft on nights when the moon is full...
He is a ware wolf!
Which side of a dog has the most hair/fur?
The outside
The wife has a new Ewok fur coat.
She looks totally wicket in it.
I just saw a stray dog with the Eiffel Tower stuck in his fur, along with Arc de Triumph and the Louvre...
...poor little guy, covered in Paris Sites.
What does a rapper who grew up on a farm do to maintain their credibility?
They keep it rural
Do bears have any fur on their butts?
No, theyβre straight up beare-assed.
What kind of fur do you get from a werewolf?
As fur away as you can get.
What kind of sports cars do cats drive?
Fur-arris!
*reference to Spongebob and Patrick stealing Sandy's fur*
Don't you hate when your catpet starts shedding fur? v.redd.it/0su91v3qc5131
A man with muscular furred limbs and claws walks into a bar
The bartender gives the man a funny look then the man says: "What? I have the right to bear arms".
Whatβs the dumbest animal in the Amazon rainforest?
The polar bear.
When my Himalayan friend told his son to go sheer a yak's fur, the son replied...
"Sherpa"
Whenever I go fur trapping...
I bring my beaver cleaver.
Whatβs the worst part of giving a cat a bath?
Getting all the fur off your tongue.
What do you call a bear with no fur?
Bear-naked
Where do dogs lose the most fur?
The shed.
I bearly finished my fur-st meme
What happened to Steven Spielberg when he went camping in Yellowstone and didn't bring a bear bag?
He had some Close Encounters of the Furred Kind.
Only a lunatic would wear a wolf fur jacket
Seriously, who else would werewolf?
My girlfriend's cat always steals my spot on the bed, it makes me FUR-ious
i asked a girl wearing fur boots and Apple Bottom jeans for water
needless to say, shawty got l'eau
Did you hear about the lady who bought a fur coat?
She wanted to be the miss in lynx
Neutering an animal makes it infertile. Making its hide into carpet squares makes it fur tile.
Why do brown bears have fur coats? ...
βCos theyβd look silly in anoraks.
What do you call a rabbit thatβs losing its fur?
A receding hareline
Friend: "Ugh, this stupid christian fur is blocking my video game!"
Me: "You mean the Cross-hair?"
Which mystical creature has the softest fur?
The were-wool-f.
I chased this guy wearing a sexy tuxedo made of cat fur
It was a hot purr suit.
100 Paw-sitively Meow-nificent Cat Purr-ns Fur Mew to Use Whenev-fur Mew Need
- Allow => A-meow
- Apology => A-paw-logy
- Appalling => A-paw-ling
- Attitude => Cat-titude
- Awesome => Paw-some / Claw-some
- Awful => Claw-ful / Paw-ful
- Because => Be-claws
- Before => Be-fur
- Bother => Bo-fur
- Catastrophe => Cat-astrophe
- Catastrophic => Cat-astrophic
- Catch => Cat-ch
- Clever => Claw-ver
- Confusing => Con-fur-sing
- Congratulations => Con-cat-ulations
- Different => Dif-fur-rent
- Disappearance => Disa-purr-ance
- Familiar => Fur-miliar
- Feeling => Feline
- For => Fur
- For real => Fur real
- Forever => Fur-ever
- Forget => Fur-get
- Fortunate => Fur-tunate
- Forward => Fur-ward
- Friend => Fur-end
- Furious => Fur-ious
- Further => Fur-ther
- Get or Got => Cat
- Help me out => Help meow-t
- History => Hiss-tory
- Hysterical => Hiss-terical
- Inferior => In-fur-ior
- Kidding me => Kitten me
- Konnichiwa => Konnichi-paw
- Literally => Litter-ally
- Literature => Litter-a-ture
- Lost => Claw-st
- Lying => Lion
- Magnificent => Meow-nificent
- Marvellous => Meow-velous
- Minimum => Mew-nimum
- Misery => Mew-sery
- Moment => Mew-ment
- Mountain => Meow-ntain
- Move => Mew-v
- Music => Mew-sic
- Musician => Meow-sician
- Never => Nev-fur
- New => Mew
- Now => Meow
- Over => Ov-fur
- Paper => Pay-purr
- Pardon me => Paw-don me
- Pause => Paws
- Perfect => Purr-fect
- Perhaps => Purr-haps
- Permission => Purr-mission
- Person => Purr-son
- Personal => Purr-sonal
- Persuasion => Purr-suasion
- Places => Purr-laces
- Please => Paw-lease
- Portable => Paw-table
- Positive => Paw-sitive
- Possibility => Paw-sibility
- Possibly => Paw-sibly
- Precious => Purr-ecious
- Prefer => Paw-fer
- Preposterous => Pre-paw-sterous
- Pretty => Purr-ty
- Priceless => Purr-iceless
- Prince => Purr-ince
- Princess => Purr-incess
- Puns => Purr-ns
- Purpose => Purr-pose
- Referring => Re-fur-ing
- Respond => Res-paw-nd
- Simple => Sim-paw-le
- Suffer => Suf-fur
- Superior => Su-purr-ior
- Tale => Tail
- Talent => Tail-ent
- Tell => Tail
- Thatβs all => Catβs all
- Unfortunate => Un-fur-tunate
- Very => Furry
- Whenever => Whene-fur
- Wonderful => Won-fur-ful
- You => Mew
- Apologize => A-paw-logize
- First => Furr-st
- How are you? => Meow are mew?
- Morning => Meowrning
- Phon
If a fox wore gloves lined with rabbit fur
Would that be faux paus?
What do rabbits use to keep their fur in place?
Hare bands
Which side of a werewolf has the most fur?
The outside.
Which side of a cat has the most fur?
The outside.
