People were creeped out by the backwards version of Fur Elise coming out of Beethoven's grave
Turns out he was just decomposing.
My son grows a lot of fur and manufactures products of art or craft on nights when the moon is full...
Which side of a dog has the most hair/fur?
What’s the dumbest animal in the Amazon rainforest?
The wife has a new Ewok fur coat.
She looks totally wicket in it.
I just saw a stray dog with the Eiffel Tower stuck in his fur, along with Arc de Triumph and the Louvre...
...poor little guy, covered in Paris Sites.
Think I've created a three fer
Do bears have any fur on their butts?
No, they’re straight up beare-assed.
What kind of fur do you get from a werewolf?
As fur away as you can get.
A man with muscular furred limbs and claws walks into a bar
The bartender gives the man a funny look then the man says:
"What? I have the right to bear arms".
When my Himalayan friend told his son to go sheer a yak's fur, the son replied...
*reference to Spongebob and Patrick stealing Sandy's fur*
Whenever I go fur trapping...
I bring my beaver cleaver.
What do you call a bear with no fur?
From my 8 year old: Dad, how do camels hide from predators?
Me: Their fur is the same color as the desert so they blend in.
Her: Exactly! They camel-flage!
I walked right into that one lol
Where do dogs lose the most fur?
Did you hear about the lady who bought a fur coat?
She wanted to be the miss in lynx
My girlfriend's cat always steals my spot on the bed, it makes me FUR-ious
I bearly finished my fur-st meme
Only a lunatic would wear a wolf fur jacket
Seriously, who else would werewolf?
Why do brown bears have fur coats? ...
‘Cos they’d look silly in anoraks.
What do you call a rabbit that’s losing its fur?
Neutering an animal makes it infertile. Making its hide into carpet squares makes it fur tile.
i asked a girl wearing fur boots and Apple Bottom jeans for water
needless to say, shawty got l'eau
I let my cat outside today but when I started listening to Daft Punk she rushed back inside
I guess she is more of a house cat
Friend: "Ugh, this stupid christian fur is blocking my video game!"
Me: "You mean the Cross-hair?"
Which mystical creature has the softest fur?
I chased this guy wearing a sexy tuxedo made of cat fur
I was going to buy my kid this winter coat we saw at the mall, but I couldn't afford it.
The next generation will be Cup, Plate, and Bowl
100 Paw-sitively Meow-nificent Cat Purr-ns Fur Mew to Use Whenev-fur Mew Need
- Allow => A-meow
- Apology => A-paw-logy
- Appalling => A-paw-ling
- Attitude => Cat-titude
- Awesome => Paw-some / Claw-some
- Awful => Claw-ful / Paw-ful
- Because => Be-claws
- Before => Be-fur
- Bother => Bo-fur
- Catastrophe => Cat-astrophe
- Catastrophic => Cat-astrophic
- Catch => Cat-ch
- Clever => Claw-ver
- Confusing => Con-fur-sing
- Congratulations => Con-cat-ulations
- Different => Dif-fur-rent
- Disappearance => Disa-purr-ance
- Familiar => Fur-miliar
- Feeling => Feline
- For => Fur
- For real => Fur real
- Forever => Fur-ever
- Forget => Fur-get
- Fortunate => Fur-tunate
- Forward => Fur-ward
- Friend => Fur-end
- Furious => Fur-ious
- Further => Fur-ther
- Get or Got => Cat
- Help me out => Help meow-t
- History => Hiss-tory
- Hysterical => Hiss-terical
- Inferior => In-fur-ior
- Kidding me => Kitten me
- Konnichiwa => Konnichi-paw
- Literally => Litter-ally
- Literature => Litter-a-ture
- Lost => Claw-st
- Lying => Lion
- Magnificent => Meow-nificent
- Marvellous => Meow-velous
- Minimum => Mew-nimum
- Misery => Mew-sery
- Moment => Mew-ment
- Mountain => Meow-ntain
- Move => Mew-v
- Music => Mew-sic
- Musician => Meow-sician
- Never => Nev-fur
- New => Mew
- Now => Meow
- Over => Ov-fur
- Paper => Pay-purr
- Pardon me => Paw-don me
- Pause => Paws
- Perfect => Purr-fect
- Perhaps => Purr-haps
- Permission => Purr-mission
- Person => Purr-son
- Personal => Purr-sonal
- Persuasion => Purr-suasion
- Places => Purr-laces
- Please => Paw-lease
- Portable => Paw-table
- Positive => Paw-sitive
- Possibility => Paw-sibility
- Possibly => Paw-sibly
- Precious => Purr-ecious
- Prefer => Paw-fer
- Preposterous => Pre-paw-sterous
- Pretty => Purr-ty
- Priceless => Purr-iceless
- Prince => Purr-ince
- Princess => Purr-incess
- Puns => Purr-ns
- Purpose => Purr-pose
- Referring => Re-fur-ing
- Respond => Res-paw-nd
- Simple => Sim-paw-le
- Suffer => Suf-fur
- Superior => Su-purr-ior
- Tale => Tail
- Talent => Tail-ent
- Tell => Tail
- That’s all => Cat’s all
- Unfortunate => Un-fur-tunate
- Very => Furry
- Whenever => Whene-fur
- Wonderful => Won-fur-ful
- You => Mew
- Apologize => A-paw-logize
- First => Furr-st
- How are you? => Meow are mew?
- Morning => Meowrning
- Phon
...
keep reading on reddit ➡
If a fox wore gloves lined with rabbit fur
What do rabbits use to keep their fur in place?
If I were to make a Möbius strip out of black and white dog fur,
would it result in eternal Dalmation?
What do you call a South African coat that is half leather half fur.
What would satin's name be if he was a furry?
Very proud of my five year old daughter. My wife screamed with a sound of absolute terror while in the shower earlier. I find out that she saw a few hairs together, thought it was a giant bug, and temporarily lost her mind. My daughter asked why she screamed...
...so I told her that her mom saw a few hairs fall out of her head and freaked out.
My daughter responds, completely deadpan, "mom had rabbits falling out of her head?"
She's going to be a great dad one day.
Edit: skipped a word
Puurfectly balanced as all things should be
I think there’s a special place in hell for my friend Dante, because he’s always trolling animal rights activists.
Which side of a werewolf has the most fur?
Which side of a cat has the most fur?
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