Did you hear about the queen who wasn’t sure how long she had ruled for?
I don't know what decisions the Supreme Court will make in 2021 but one thing is for sure...
after the dam failed, the engineer thought he'd lost his job for sure
but at the performance review he was consoled by his boss, "it's all just water under the bridge"
Joe sure is patient when it comes to waiting for the results of the election
All I hear is Joe Biden his time till the results are finalized!
would provide energy for sure
Whenever my son has to make a picture for homework, I always make sure he signs his name last
Because Andrew is a lot shorter than Andrawing
No one knows for sure how many Covid cases there are...
For being a gay guy, Andy Warhol sure did have a thing for
The best advice my dad ever gave me: if ever you are desperately searching for something, make sure to take an apple with you.
That way, your search cannot be fruitless.
Despite a grave outlook on the economy and a dying customer base, one industry for sure won't be going under anytime soon:
Visiting my parents for the first time since COVID. He has taken up cropdusting people and proclaiming, "Surprise health check." To make sure you can smell and/or taste still.
Sorry not a witty one-liner but peak of dad humor.
Not really sure this is a dad joke but my daughter just confused us both. She's making bracelets and said she plans to sell them for 50 cents to raise money for her school.
She said she'll give half to her school and keep a quarter for herself.
Not sure if it's legal for me to makes these jokes bc I'm not a dad so here it goes... What does a duck and a homeless person have in common?... . .
My friend used to say this all the time when someone disagreed with an opinion of his. Not sure if it’s appropriate for this sub, but it still makes me laugh when used today.
“Well, there are two kinds of people in this world. Those who are, and those who are not, my uncle.”
I was drawing a zombie for my friend and wasn't sure how I would draw his eyes. First time posting here but hope this counts.
This made me laugh so hard... More than I should have, for sure
I'm sure you've heard of alphabet soup. Now get ready for..
I was told to be sure to use the right nails for putting down trim in my house, but I can't find any.
At this point, I'm not even sure Finland makes nails!
I'm not sure if my wife would be okay with traveling outside the 48 contiguous states for our vacation
My doctor: Thanks for being patient. (Happened 5 min ago, not sure he realized his genius)
I'm sure I'll catch alkynes of grief for this...
I'm sure there are plenty of televangelists who aren't just doing it for the money
But I feel like a lot of them are just preaching to acquire.
If I think my son is gay but he dates a girl named Amanda, I’ll know for sure.
Because she’s a man, duh.
If you're buying a car for your elephant, make sure it has plenty of trunk space.
The highlighting is meant for those who don't appreciate puns I'm sure, I saw it right away
My date asked me to go back to her place for "a movie". I said sure.
She said, "How does popcorn sound?"
I said, "Crunchy."
I heard that a famous cartoonist died today. But I don't know for sure...
The details were a little sketchy.
Cricket players involved in match fixing are sure to give you a run for your money.
I'm not sure I can tell you word-for-word what the 2nd Amendment is...
But I'll take a shot at it!
As we sat down at the table for dinner, I looked sheepishly at my family and admitted, "I learned a valuable lesson about speeding today and I'll definitely make sure it never happens again."
"I didn’t get pulled over or anything, it's just that I got to work 20 minutes early."
Got my husband with a joke I thought for sure he's heard before...
He was talking about how he would love to have a pirate wife. I said, "Pirate wives can't finish the alphabet... They get stuck at C..."
He laughed and told me to get out. I asked him, "You've never heard that one before? Are you C-rious?"
I think he is going to file for divorce now.
My wife's going for a sonogram soon. Or a daughterogram. We're not sure yet.
As a janitor, I make sure to tell people there's always broom for improvement
I've been growing a beard for four months. At first I wasn't sure if l liked it.
But it's really grown on me.
Can anyone here help me? I'm not sure if this is the right place to ask for help. My son asked me to make him a paper airplane.
I tried all the magic I know but he's still just a boy.
For having such strong opinions on border security, Donald Trump sure can cross the line.
My sister got a new pillow for her birthday but she said she was not sure if she liked it.
My dad said she should sleep on it.
I'm an optometry student... I'm sure my dad has a database of eye related jokes stored up for when I talk about my course.
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