A little boy ran up to me " please help, my Dad is in a fight " I followed and we came across two men fighting. I said, " Ok, which one is your Dad ? " ..
.. " I dunno, that's what they're fighting about "
He followed the instructions word-for-word
Wise men followed a Star-Bucks...
Nauru is the most obese country in the world, followed by the Cook Islands.
Does that mean that the Cook Islands have a fat chance of catching up?
Most people think that the word “Queue” is just the letter “Q” followed by four silent letters. But they are not silent.
They are just waiting their turn.
A pumpkin spiced latte joke should contain the set up, followed by the punchline and
I left work and a cop followed me home for my entire 50 minute commute then ticketed me in my own driveway.
He approached me after I had parked in my driveway and asked if I knew why he was writing me a ticket.
I told him I had no idea what I had done wrong.
He said that he followed me for my entire commute and not once did I get in an accident. He fined me for wreck-less driving.
My wife told me to flip off the thermostat before we left the house. I don’t think she appreciated how I followed her instructions.
I’ve always followed in my father’s footsteps until today.
He turned around and said, “STOP!”
"Ho, ho, ho," the jolly bastard mused, unaware I'd been slinking in the shadows for days, ready to unleash my revenge. I'd memorized his patterns, followed his every move, and had set the perfect trap. Down the chimney, ensnared by my noose, and left hanging above the fireplace; I got what I wanted.
16 Sodium atoms walk into a bar followed by Batman.
I was in the pub having a drink when a girl came up to me and said she can show me a good time. So I followed her out the back where she took off her top...
...and she ran 100m in 10 seconds
I posted the Knitler picture and puns followed, except they didn't consider some puns
Mom: I hear that John's business is doing a lot better. How did he manage to get enough people to slow down on that stretch of highway to even notice his store? Dad: Oh, he followed my advice and put up a billboard.
"Nude Colony Ahead, Keep Your Eyes on the Road!"
My roommate said he was gonna call the police for punning on Easter. This followed.
What followed the great war between multiplication and division?
Just happened. An awkward silence followed until it finally clicked.
Friend: watching TV show called Sunday "I wonder when Sunday ends."
Me: "11:59 I think."
Ever hear the joke about the time Batman was followed back to the Batcave by 14 sodium atoms?
NaNaNaNaNaNaNaNaNaNaNaNaNaNa
What did the corn say when it was being followed?
Thought I got followed by the official Hanson twitter account
But it turned out to be an MmmBot
Her: I put my phone on silent and now I can’t find it! Me: You should have followed Beyoncé ‘s advice.
If you want it, you should have put a ring on it.
Posted this classic to the work corkboard, and my manager followed it up with another good pun underneath it.
imgur.com/OoOpuBD
At grandpa's 80th birthday party. Cake time, cousin asked for milk followed by "What's the difference betweent 1% milk and 2%?"
Without missing a beat my uncle ( her dad) says "1%"
Simple but made the whole table laugh
We followed my dad's death bed wish and buried him covered in baked flour, tomato sauce, mozzarella cheese and pepperoni...
R.I.P dad, Rest In Pizza.
What do I do as a sweet cold dessert being followed by a serial killer?
Got the death glare followed by a laugh from the gf.
Girlfriend told me her ear was ringing..
I told her to answer it.
Ever since our son was born, it's been the same routine every morning. First the crying, then a breastfeeding, followed by a nap…
It's the only way I can cope…
I believed I followed True North on my compass
Turns out it was just an azi-myth
I made a joke about Pi day being an irrational holiday, and then my dad followed up with this joke;
It was suggested that I make a carrot cake today rather than a pie, but I only have a square pan. I just know that a square root cake would never work on Pi day.
If Einstein had followed up on his patented design for a kitchen appliance refrigerator
He could have sold millions of them and become a fridge magnate.
Hauling my truck back to Michigan. My dad won't stop cracking this one, "Man that guy is on my ass!!" Followed by historically laughing.
Always followed by "heh. I'm so funny"
Anyone ever: I'm going to the bathroom.
Dad: Mention my name and you'll get a good seat!
Went clothes shopping with my dad. He followed me around the whole department asking if he "looks fat" in various items.
"This and That" otherwise known as my Dads favorite joke. Told at any occasion to family members, friends or complete strangers in the street always followed by a hearty dad laugh.
imgur.com/a/EVYXo?gallery
People think that the word 'queue' is just 'Q' followed by 4 silent letters
But those letters aren't silent, they're just waiting their turn
Queue is just one letter followed by four silent letters
They must be waiting for their turn.
Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.
