What happens when the smog clears from Southern California?

UCLA

πŸ‘οΈŽ 25
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/WereMadeOfStars
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jul 17 2022
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Daughter: *clears throat - I have a frog in my throat....

Me: well, it's no wonder our discussion has been so ribbiting.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 8
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Tbables
πŸ“…οΈŽ Feb 25 2022
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What happens when you’re driving on a highway in California and the smoke clears?

UCLA

πŸ‘οΈŽ 6
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/YZXFILE
πŸ“…οΈŽ Nov 26 2021
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At Bob's retirement party the Director stands up and says "I'd just like to say a word about Bob", clears his throat and then says, "plethora",

Bob turns to him and says, "thank you, that means a lot".

πŸ‘οΈŽ 4
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Nomadic187187
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jul 09 2020
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Clearing a windscreen
πŸ‘οΈŽ 95
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/uBattyCursor
πŸ“…οΈŽ Apr 15 2023
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Montreal's public transit authority (STM) posted a May the 4th update to their map of the city's subway system. (Original map included for wordplay reference - obviously works best if you understand French). Someone at the STM clearly had a field day.
πŸ‘οΈŽ 6
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/TheSoThenWhat
πŸ“…οΈŽ May 04 2023
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Clearing a windscreen
πŸ‘οΈŽ 177
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/CommercialJumps
πŸ“…οΈŽ Mar 18 2023
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It's clearly a sin()
πŸ‘οΈŽ 38
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/yppl
πŸ“…οΈŽ Mar 13 2023
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I've read the definition of the word Ambiguity, but I didn't find it clear!

Even the dictionary cannot help, it just says it's not clear!

πŸ‘οΈŽ 3
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/e-bio
πŸ“…οΈŽ May 09 2023
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What do you call a politician with a clear conscience?

An Alzheimer's patient.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 181
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/unselfishdata
πŸ“…οΈŽ Feb 03 2023
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A man goes to a funeral.

He walks up to the widow and says, "May I say a word?"

She says, "Yes, of course!"

He clears his throat, and says, "Bargain."

The widow says, "Thank you. That means a great deal."

πŸ‘οΈŽ 4k
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Mail-Esc0rt
πŸ“…οΈŽ Apr 11 2023
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I was clearing the snow off the driveway with my son today.

He said, "Dad, I wish you would just use a shovel."

πŸ‘οΈŽ 49
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/bkrank
πŸ“…οΈŽ Mar 22 2023
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My boss told me I had to listen clearly and asked if I understand.

So I walked next to him and bent my knee halfway so I was just under standing.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 7
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Hmmmmmelikey
πŸ“…οΈŽ Apr 22 2023
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What do you call clear urine?

1080p!

Transpeerent!

πŸ‘οΈŽ 5
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/froctoso
πŸ“…οΈŽ Mar 10 2023
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What’s clear and smells like carrots?

Rabbit farts.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 66
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Murcalurc
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 17 2023
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What do you call crystal clear urine?

1080pee.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 28
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/kickypie
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 05 2023
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Clearing a windscreen
πŸ‘οΈŽ 94
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/SavoryBounds
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 18 2023
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Steer clear of PEDs

When Lance Armstrong was caught for doping allegations, he was on a cycle

πŸ‘οΈŽ 2
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/SkillHunter96
πŸ“…οΈŽ Feb 24 2023
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I’ve been clearing out the kids bedrooms and threw away their huge purple dinosaur.

They had a massive Barney!

πŸ‘οΈŽ 2
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/reddirich
πŸ“…οΈŽ Mar 10 2023
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What do you say to a Frenchman you can’t see clearly?

Excuse-moirΓ©

πŸ‘οΈŽ 2
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/1stworld_solutionist
πŸ“…οΈŽ Mar 15 2023
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Dad, what's your favorite color.

No it isn't. It's blue.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 6
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Ziograffiato
πŸ“…οΈŽ May 09 2023
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Just so everyone’s clear…

…I’m going to put my glasses on

πŸ‘οΈŽ 12
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/TwoTonJoe
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 25 2023
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I asked a goose of I could use some of his feathers but he made it pretty clear...

...he is not down.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 16
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/mrthatsthat
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 23 2023
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My kid came out to me as trans and asked if I still accepted them for who they are. I told them quite clearly that I loved them no matter what they chose.

I was being transparent.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 14k
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/AshFaden
πŸ“…οΈŽ Apr 19 2022
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After dinner, my wife asked if I could clear the table.

I needed a running start, but I made it!

πŸ‘οΈŽ 203
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/UnderMiner2008
πŸ“…οΈŽ Nov 08 2022
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Clearly car repair is in their genes
πŸ‘οΈŽ 24
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/ibrentlam
πŸ“…οΈŽ Dec 16 2022
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Purple is my favorite color!

I like it more than blue and red combined.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 13
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/SpecialBumblebee6170
πŸ“…οΈŽ Apr 22 2023
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A woman is at her deceased husband's funeral.

A man goes up to her and asks, "Do you mind if I say a word?" "No," she answers.

The man stands up, clears his throat, and says, "Plethora."

"Thank you," says the woman, "That means a lot."

πŸ‘οΈŽ 20
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/yankee_doodle_
πŸ“…οΈŽ Apr 16 2023
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Today I thought of a color that doesn't exist...

but then I realized it was just a pigment of my imagination.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 250
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/SpecialBumblebee6170
πŸ“…οΈŽ Apr 20 2023
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Be careful about dating someone who is obsessed with plastic wrap.

They are quite clingy.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 3
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/FinalCaveat
πŸ“…οΈŽ May 06 2023
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The Kardashians have a great relationship with Caitlyn, very transparent.

I made this one up, hope you like it.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 4
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/AFishfulOfDollarz
πŸ“…οΈŽ Apr 08 2023
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Why do cows have hooves, not feet?

Because they lactose

πŸ‘οΈŽ 2k
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/mamypokong
πŸ“…οΈŽ Feb 28 2023
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What do you call an inaccurate scale whose only working function is the clear operation?

Tare-able.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 10
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/jakeaarona
πŸ“…οΈŽ Dec 10 2022
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What did the farmer say to his cows when they asked to stay up late?

"Sorry, it's pasture bedtime."

πŸ‘οΈŽ 33
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/AnEvilSunBro
πŸ“…οΈŽ Apr 14 2023
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infinity squared...
πŸ‘οΈŽ 77
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Finnish_Snow_Flower
πŸ“…οΈŽ Apr 02 2023
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My doctor told me 3 years ago that I was going deaf…

I haven’t heard from him since.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 1k
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Seahawks1991
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 28 2023
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Why does Spider-Man like picking his nose?

To get rid of the Green Goblin

πŸ‘οΈŽ 49
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Toku-Nation
πŸ“…οΈŽ Apr 19 2023
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Clearly, it is.
πŸ‘οΈŽ 5k
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/llondru-es
πŸ“…οΈŽ Nov 18 2021
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My teenage daughter claims she's being stereotyped because she looks like Jennifer Aniston's character in the sitcom Friends.

I told her it was a clear case of Rachel profiling.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 140
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/e1p1
πŸ“…οΈŽ Apr 03 2023
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I wanted to destroy any existing record of Mario & Luigi having ever dealt with bad guys…

So I cleared their Bowser History.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 262
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Ho2Me9
πŸ“…οΈŽ Apr 06 2023
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Clearly Stonehenge
πŸ‘οΈŽ 2k
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Extra-Act-801
πŸ“…οΈŽ Apr 16 2022
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I was at the bank and my lending specialist Crystal didn't seem trustworthy...

I could see right through her.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 3
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/jolly2284
πŸ“…οΈŽ Apr 26 2023
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Our dog chewed up our high speed internet cable.

Clearly he needed more fiber in his diet.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 24
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Musicman1019
πŸ“…οΈŽ May 05 2023
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I dreamed I was invisible and I married an invisible woman.

I'm not sure what we saw in each other. Our kids were nothing to look at either.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 183
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/crazyfortaco
πŸ“…οΈŽ Mar 06 2023
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What happens when the smog clears from over Los Angeles?

UCLA.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 14
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/spacey_kasey
πŸ“…οΈŽ Aug 10 2019
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What happens when the smog clears in California?

UCLA!

πŸ‘οΈŽ 7
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/AlKruseFTW
πŸ“…οΈŽ Nov 17 2014
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My wife asked if I could clear the kitchen table.

I had to get a running start but I made it.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 22
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/EndersGame_Reviewer
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 14 2023
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Just so everybody's clear

I’m going to put my glasses on

πŸ‘οΈŽ 361
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Pessimist2020
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jul 31 2022
🚨︎ report

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