A man who had just died was delivered to the mortuary wearing a beautiful black suit.

The mortician asked the deceased’s wife how she would like the body dressed. He points out the man looks good in the black suit he’s already wearing. The widow however said she thought her husband always looked his best in blue, and she would really like him in a blue suit. She then hands the mortician a blank cheque and says β€œI don’t care how much it costs, but please have my husband in a blue suit for the viewing.” The woman returns the next day for the wake. To her delight she finds her husband dressed in a gorgeous blue suit with a subtle chalk stripe. Remarkably, the suit fit him perfectly. She says to the mortician, β€œwhatever this costs I’m very satisfied, you did an excellent job and I’m incredibly grateful. How much did you spend?” To her astonishment the mortician presents her with her blank cheque, and he says β€œthere’s no charge.” Shocked she replies β€œno really, I feel like i must compensate you for the cost of that exquisite blue suit.” β€œHonestly ma’am”, the mortician says, β€œit costs nothing, you see a diseased gentleman about your husbands size was brought in shortly after you left yesterday. He was wearing an attractive blue suit. So I asked his wife if she minded if her husband went to the grave wearing black. She had said it made no difference so long as he looked nice. So from that point on it was really just a matter of switching the heads.”

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πŸ‘€︎ u/PaladinDanza
πŸ“…︎ Jan 07 2021
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Chalk boards are no longer being used in schools, so when the last school finally took them down to install smart boards, the teachers gathered all the writing utensils from them and had a large bon fire just outside the school. It smelled so good.

They loved chalk lit.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Baldeagle77
πŸ“…︎ Aug 22 2020
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What is a superhero name given to someone who never misses with a chalk?

Chawkeye.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/reddit_federation
πŸ“…︎ Jul 30 2020
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At crime scenes where they sketch out a body with chalk?

Is that technically a die-agram?

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Gooddayitisi
πŸ“…︎ Apr 23 2020
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My wife designed a dress made completely from recycled whiteboards!

It's really quite remarkable!

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/uranus_be_cold
πŸ“…︎ Mar 10 2021
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My 4yo daughter was playing ice cream shop, pretending that little pieces of chalk were the ice cream flavors. She asked me what flavor I wanted

Chalkolate

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πŸ‘€︎ u/krigito
πŸ“…︎ Mar 07 2020
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Did you see they finally came out with a new chalk board?

It’s pretty remarkable!

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/unicycleguy06
πŸ“…︎ Oct 07 2019
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Not sure if this board works out.
πŸ‘︎ 4k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/orlanthi
πŸ“…︎ Apr 06 2020
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Chalk it up to my artistic skill
πŸ‘︎ 76
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πŸ‘€︎ u/CCplusplus
πŸ“…︎ Jul 14 2018
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this guy knows what he's chalking about imgur.com/PqvcHiH
πŸ‘︎ 107
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πŸ‘€︎ u/838266
πŸ“…︎ Jun 23 2015
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I find white boards interesting

They're quite remarkable.

πŸ‘︎ 3k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Av8r96
πŸ“…︎ May 22 2018
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Martin Heit invented the dry erase board in the 1950s

That's remarkable!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/DarkKing16
πŸ“…︎ Mar 03 2020
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The professor had used the entire blackboard for the lecture

The blackboard is now chalk-full of information

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πŸ‘€︎ u/gssn-nospace
πŸ“…︎ Jul 27 2020
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What did the blackboard say to the eraser when they broke up?

Can’t we just chalk about it?

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πŸ‘€︎ u/IIIIRadsIIII
πŸ“…︎ Mar 06 2020
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Must have been really board standing all day.
πŸ‘︎ 4k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Dankmonseiur69
πŸ“…︎ Sep 26 2017
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Whiteboards are mankinds greatest invention

They are absolutely remarkable.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/gwtkof
πŸ“…︎ Oct 24 2016
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I've always thought kids being able to draw on the sidewalks at school is only teaching them that vandalism is okay...

but I guess it could be chalked up to freedom of expression...

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πŸ‘€︎ u/TheMillionthSam
πŸ“…︎ Aug 30 2017
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Blackboards were around long before the invention of whiteboards in the '60s...

Both are highly remarkable inventions. Chalk that up to man's ingenuity.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Aug 10 2019
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What do you call a calcium carbonate flavoured latte?

A chalk-latte

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πŸ‘€︎ u/pabesh17
πŸ“…︎ Jul 31 2019
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My friend died by consuming excess amounts of Calcium Carbonate.

He chalked himself to death.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/sodomicity
πŸ“…︎ Feb 08 2019
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Some people don't think whiteboards are interesting...

Personally I find them remarkable

πŸ‘︎ 61
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πŸ‘€︎ u/TheWilkster
πŸ“…︎ Mar 05 2017
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When I was a kid we had blackboards now you kids use whiteboards.

The eracism is getting worse.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/forgotpassword69
πŸ“…︎ Jan 07 2015
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Arts teacher draws class portrait on blackboard

Now the entire student body is in chalk.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/gone4011s
πŸ“…︎ Jun 04 2015
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My wife got me good

We we're out shoe shopping earlier and she couldn't find anything she liked. Me: "I think we're going to have to chalk this one up as a loss" Her: "I will never except de feet"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/hockeyplayr
πŸ“…︎ Mar 08 2014
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My 2 year old asked me to draw a cookie on the sidewalk.

Sure! I'll make you a Chalk-alate chip cookie. The look on my wife's face made me realize i have become my dad...

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/bauermundo
πŸ“…︎ Jun 03 2014
🚨︎ report
an old man died and was delivered to the local mortuary.....

.. and he's wearing an expensive, expertly tailored black suit. The mortician asks the deceased's wife how she would like the body dressed, pointing out that the man does look good in the black suit he is already wearing. The widow, however, says that she always thought her husband looked his best in blue, and that she wants him in a blue suit. She gives the mortician a blank check and says, 'I don't care what it costs, but please have my husband in a blue suit for the viewing.' The woman returns the next day and to her delight, she finds her husband dressed in a gorgeous blue suit with a subtle chalk stripe; the suit fits him perfectly. She says to the mortician, 'Whatever this cost, I'm very satisfied.. You did an excellent job and I'm very grateful. How much did you spend?' To her astonishment, the mortician presents her with the blank check, 'There's no charge.' 'No, really, I must compensate you for the cost of that exquisite blue suit,' she says. 'Honestly, ma'am,' the mortician says, 'it cost nothing. You see, a deceased gentleman of about your husband's size was brought in shortly after you left yesterday, and he was wearing an attractive blue suit. I asked his wife if she minded him going to his grave wearing a black suit instead, and she said it made no difference as long as he looked nice.' 'So I just switched the heads.'

πŸ‘︎ 49
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πŸ‘€︎ u/kickypie
πŸ“…︎ Apr 26 2019
🚨︎ report
How do blackboards communicate?

They chalk to each other

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/PBandJthyme
πŸ“…︎ Feb 23 2019
🚨︎ report

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