Today I learned that if you're in a canoe and it flips over in water...
....you can safely wear it on your head... because it's capsized.
Before my surgery today, the anesthesiologist asked if I'd like to be knocked out with gas or he could just hit me over the head with a canoe paddle. So I guess it was...
...an ether/oar situation...
How do you row a canoe filled with puppies?
Bring out the doggy paddle.
Did you hear about the guy who lit a fire in his canoe and caused it to sink?
It just goes to show, you can't have your kayak and heat it too!
My dad once tried making coffee. When he tasted it he said "ahh, like making love in a canoe."
I asked if it was that good, his smile faded and he looked me dead in the eye as he said no, its fucking close to water. He poured it down the drain without losing focus and walked out of the kitchen
My girlfriend and I broke up at summer camp. We got into an argument over which canoe to get take.
She got in one and I the other. Then we just drifted apart.
Drinking American beer is the same as having sex on a canoe.
It’s f*cking close to water.
There was a big sale on canoe paddles at the store today.
It was quite an oar deal.
Went canoeing with my dad.
I asked if he wanted to man the left or right paddle.
He said either oar.
The sporting goods store downtown was having a big sale on canoe paddles, but traffic and road construction made it real pain to get there...
...yeah, it was quite the ordeal to get the oar deal.
what do you call a canoe that's 50% off?
I spit on your forking grave.
During a recent camping trip, my son rigged his drone to paddle his canoe for him. He called it the "DronePaddle3000".
We were camping near the lake and my wife wanted to go canoeing...
She asked: "Which paddle should I take? The short wooden one, the long metal one?
I replied: "Doesn't matter, its either-oar situation"
I hate jokes about canoes.
My dad would always tell me that, if my canoe flipped over, I could just use it as a hat...
My son just bought a 27-foot long canoe.
He told me it was really expensive because its material, kevlar, its seats, leather, and the hull, 9 yards.
There was an amazing discount on canoes at Dick' s sporting goods.
It was quite the oar deal.
What is the best way to steer a canoe?
My buddy founded a canoe business that’s really taking off.
I had the same idea, but I missed the boat.
I can't think of a better way to cross the lake
What did the President decide to name his brand new canoe after leaving the store?
Which paddle do you use when you sit in the front of a canoe?
My wife told me she's slam my head on the keyboard if I don't get off the computer !
Don't worry guys, I think she's jokinlkjhfakljn m,.nbziyoao78yv87dfaoyuofaytdf
What do you call a mechanical man paddling a canoe?
What does Donald Trump call kayaks?
What do you call an old canoe?
Passionate man paddling a canoe:
Some oak on the water; there's fire in this guy.
Apparently scientists are working on self driving canoes
They'll be powered by a few row bots
We have a metal paddle for our canoe...
I told the kids it's iron oar.
How do you make any boat a hat?
You flip it over and it becomes capsized.
What do you call a bot that likes to sit in a canoe?
I was cold while in my kayak so I lit a fire and it sunk
Shows you can’t have your kayak and heat it too!
Went to the boundary waters for canoeing recently
While there, I picked up my phone and said "Hello, Yeah this is him. On my way."
Looked over at my friends and said, "oh don't worry, that was just nature calling" and headed towards the bathroom. I could hear groans behind me.
Yeah... They almost left me there
My brother refers to light beer as "making love in a canoe"
Because it's f***ing near water.
(He doesn't even have kids, so I guess it's an uncle joke)
/u/Juiceman17 on canoeing
http://www.reddit.com/r/WTF/comments/2d7304/our_canoes_got_stuck_and_this_guy_comes_to_help/cjmua87
>/u/juinjing: Can't you canoe faster than you can swim? Legitimate question. I am not an aquatic man.
>/u/Juiceman17: A canoe is certainly faster than a cannot
Today I learned that if a canoe turns upside down in the water, you can safely wear it on your head.
TIL: If your canoe turns upside down in the water, you can wear it on your head.
When you barf in a canoe...
this coffee is like having sex in a canoe
it’s fucking close to water
What have american beer and sex in a canoe in common?
The canoe store has a big sale last week.
It was quite the oar deal.
The sporting goods store just had a big sale on canoes
It was quite the oar deal
The sporting goods store in my town has a sale on canoes
Drinking my coffee this morning was like making love on a canoe
It's fucking close to water.
TIL: If your boat turns upside down in the river, you can wear it on your head.
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