What's blue and not very heavy?

Light blue.

πŸ‘︎ 672
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πŸ‘€︎ u/howiewu0402
πŸ“…︎ Jul 09
🚨︎ report
Ladies and Gentlemen, I present to you: "Blues Lee"
πŸ‘︎ 3k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/r0b3rt1c0
πŸ“…︎ May 08
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Errors are red, screen is blue, i think i deleted, system 32.
πŸ‘︎ 21
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Hallower87
πŸ“…︎ Aug 05
🚨︎ report
What's blue and doesn't weigh very much?

Light Blue

πŸ‘︎ 9k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Keegan-Gin
πŸ“…︎ Apr 13
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What happened when the red boat crashed into the blue boat?

The crews were marooned.

πŸ‘︎ 56
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πŸ‘€︎ u/InfiPlayer
πŸ“…︎ Jul 31
🚨︎ report
I couldn’t think of a good Blue Cheese joke to share for my Cheese Day...

So instead, tell me your best and maybe even... cheesiest... joke that you’ve used for your own Blue Cheese Day!!

Edit: Apparently that’s a Cake. Damn it. I probably could have found a sweet cake joke to use.

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/AFUSMC74
πŸ“…︎ Jul 28
🚨︎ report
I mustache you a question. Have you seen my blue marker?
πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/jeepinmama
πŸ“…︎ Jul 30
🚨︎ report
What's red and smells like blue paint?

Red paint.

πŸ‘︎ 28
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πŸ‘€︎ u/GalacticDestroyr
πŸ“…︎ Jul 09
🚨︎ report
Blues clues brother
πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Evansonly
πŸ“…︎ Jul 05
🚨︎ report
What did the blue sheep say to the red sheep?

Voting third party is a waste.

πŸ‘︎ 85
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Urbandale-Apiary
πŸ“…︎ Jul 08
🚨︎ report
Roses are red, violets are blue

I'm very observant.

πŸ‘︎ 16
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πŸ‘€︎ u/karma-enigma
πŸ“…︎ Jul 17
🚨︎ report
What do you call a man covered in blue paint with a wrench taped to his hand?

Confused.

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/propervernacular
πŸ“…︎ Aug 08
🚨︎ report
My grandpa walked in with a blue arrow on his forehead and smiled...

me: "what are you supposed to be?"

grandpa: "Im a boomerang"

πŸ‘︎ 15
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πŸ“…︎ Jul 09
🚨︎ report
What's Blue and lies under a mushroom ?

Smurf poop

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/HellsJuggernaut
πŸ“…︎ Jul 25
🚨︎ report
Darn, we blue it!
πŸ‘︎ 310
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πŸ‘€︎ u/orlanthi
πŸ“…︎ May 07
🚨︎ report
My wife got me an alarm clock out of the blue.

I was alarmed.

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Shadoremi64
πŸ“…︎ Jul 23
🚨︎ report
What is the ultramarine blue?

A watercolor.

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/TinzaX
πŸ“…︎ Jul 20
🚨︎ report
What is blue and doesn't weigh much?

Light blue.

Edit : Thanks for the silver and gold

Edit 2 : Wow that blue up

Edit 3 : I never type "thanks for the ..." line, but since silver is also a colour, I did.

πŸ‘︎ 11k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/MolecularPotato
πŸ“…︎ Dec 20 2019
🚨︎ report
I bought these textured gloves earlier but got a tiny bit of blue paint on them

Guess you could say I’m feeling a little blue

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Gavanthino
πŸ“…︎ Jun 27
🚨︎ report
I've got a pedigree toothless Norwegian Blue Parrot I want to enter in competitions

I hope it sucks seeds

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Hamsternoir
πŸ“…︎ Jul 04
🚨︎ report
What’s blue and not heavy?

Light blue

πŸ‘︎ 65
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/streety22
πŸ“…︎ May 29
🚨︎ report
Roses are red. Violets are blue

Just an observation.

πŸ‘︎ 6
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/karma-enigma
πŸ“…︎ Jun 19
🚨︎ report
What’s blue and red and smells like shit?

Blue and red shit.

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/pickledust465
πŸ“…︎ Jun 08
🚨︎ report
What do you call blue eyes that are bloodshot?

Patriotic

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ALizardKing
πŸ“…︎ Jun 19
🚨︎ report
I’m a blues musician, so my wife is always saying how soulful I am.

Any chance she gets she will say, β€œYou are soul.”

πŸ‘︎ 6
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/smaghammer
πŸ“…︎ May 15
🚨︎ report
We can't decide whether to put in soft pink or baby blue flooring in the nursery

It's an infantile problem

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/lfantine
πŸ“…︎ Jun 14
🚨︎ report
Elon Musk just completed his SpaceX warp drive, and Blue Origin can't compete.

He's light-years ahead of the competition now.

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Sir_Pluses
πŸ“…︎ Jun 15
🚨︎ report
Blue Ray quality.
πŸ‘︎ 405
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πŸ‘€︎ u/TheFriman
πŸ“…︎ Jan 12
🚨︎ report
What happens when you drop a red hat in a blue ocean?

It gets wet

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/WiiSexDolphin
πŸ“…︎ May 01
🚨︎ report
What's blue in colour and not heavy?

Light Blue

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Dadushka008
πŸ“…︎ May 29
🚨︎ report
A dental implant is a device. Toothpaste can be blue.

So if you have a dental implant, and brush with blue toothpaste, what do you call it?

A Bluetooth device.

Courtesy of my seven-year-old son, who is getting the hang of this pun thing.

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ“…︎ May 18
🚨︎ report
Roses are Red,Violets are Blue
πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/PTasker15
πŸ“…︎ Feb 26
🚨︎ report
The colours red, white and blue are the colours of freedom.

Until they are flashing behind you.

πŸ‘︎ 8
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Rav4xle
πŸ“…︎ May 09
🚨︎ report
Roses are red, Violets are blue
πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Feb 26
🚨︎ report
What happened when the red ship and the blue ship crashed

They were marooned

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/kickypie
πŸ“…︎ May 12
🚨︎ report
What do I have if I have 8 red LEGO bricks in one hand and 16 blue LEGO bricks in the other hand?

Really big hands.

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/andersonfmly
πŸ“…︎ May 01
🚨︎ report
What's green and smells like blue paint?
πŸ‘︎ 6
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/1kings2214
πŸ“…︎ May 08
🚨︎ report
My son’s blue crayon wore out, so I gave him a yellow crayon to paint.

He said, β€œThis blue up. Thanks for the gold.”

πŸ‘︎ 13
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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Apr 29
🚨︎ report
A red ship and a blue ship crashed

The survivors were left marooned

πŸ‘︎ 28
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Eggycrunchyb0b
πŸ“…︎ Apr 12
🚨︎ report
If a Bluebird has blue-babies, and a blackbird has black-babies, what kind of bird has no-babies?

A Swallow.

πŸ‘︎ 23
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πŸ‘€︎ u/KoronaSenpai
πŸ“…︎ Apr 06
🚨︎ report
TIL the color magenta doesn't exist, it is your brain trying to make sense of your red and blue cones activating while the green is inactive.

Turns out, it's a pigment of your imagination

πŸ‘︎ 31
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πŸ“…︎ Feb 28
🚨︎ report
I can't wait for the Korean blues singer to come to town!

I hear his sound is very Seoulful and reminiscent of the 70’s.

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Apr 06
🚨︎ report
What’s red and smells like blue paint?

Red paint

πŸ‘︎ 66
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πŸ‘€︎ u/UnhappyTatorTot
πŸ“…︎ Nov 20 2019
🚨︎ report
If a red house is made of red bricks and a blue house is made of blue bricks, then what is a green house made of?

Glass

πŸ‘︎ 49
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πŸ‘€︎ u/kortbug2000
πŸ“…︎ Dec 21 2019
🚨︎ report
Work is killing my feet: they are all black and blue
πŸ‘︎ 17
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πŸ‘€︎ u/sine_nomine1859
πŸ“…︎ Dec 17 2019
🚨︎ report
Dad: β€œI like to have my shoes match my pants. For instance, my brown shoes go well with my blue pants and my black shoes go well with my gray pants. My stripper heels on the other hand...”

β€œ...don’t go with anything.”

My dad never makes β€œdad jokes” but, he actually said this yesterday and I’m so proud.

πŸ‘︎ 12
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πŸ‘€︎ u/blueholeload
πŸ“…︎ Jan 20
🚨︎ report
Roses are red violets are blue...

I can make only bad dad jokes unlike you.

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/diamondsarefun
πŸ“…︎ Mar 02
🚨︎ report
The fact that everything we see in monitors is made up of only red, green and blue is amazing. I suppose you could say...

They RGBees knees

πŸ‘︎ 12
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Spudzzy03
πŸ“…︎ Jan 08
🚨︎ report
Roses are red, violets are blue

You're welcome for the gardening facts

πŸ‘︎ 11
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πŸ‘€︎ u/x_amxxn_x
πŸ“…︎ Feb 01
🚨︎ report
What repeatable, documented procedure do artists use when formulating the perfect shade of blue?

The Cyantific Method!

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/EyeTack
πŸ“…︎ Feb 08
🚨︎ report
'Blue Danube-Dee Danube-Die' by Eiffel 1865 youtube.com/watch?v=TBmem…
πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/cheifemu
πŸ“…︎ Dec 16 2019
🚨︎ report
Kamala Harris must be feeling blue
πŸ‘︎ 11
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Wuellig
πŸ“…︎ Dec 04 2019
🚨︎ report
Why was the professor blue?

He was a cyan-tist

πŸ‘︎ 39
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πŸ‘€︎ u/RetroGama
πŸ“…︎ Dec 28 2019
🚨︎ report
What's blue plus blue?

Baby blue

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Nialskey
πŸ“…︎ Nov 23 2019
🚨︎ report
Red ship hits Blue ship...

Sailors marooned.

πŸ‘︎ 53
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Rocknocker
πŸ“…︎ Oct 23 2019
🚨︎ report
You know what's blue and not heavy at all?

Light blue.

πŸ‘︎ 18
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πŸ‘€︎ u/dumb-reply
πŸ“…︎ Nov 01 2019
🚨︎ report
Blue cheese is smelly, Digital
πŸ‘︎ 19
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πŸ‘€︎ u/CluKInCok
πŸ“…︎ Nov 02 2019
🚨︎ report
Im blue
πŸ‘︎ 35
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πŸ‘€︎ u/JC112579
πŸ“…︎ Aug 16 2019
🚨︎ report
Jesus Christ, that's a blue shelf
πŸ‘︎ 19
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πŸ‘€︎ u/rolyatmot
πŸ“…︎ Sep 21 2019
🚨︎ report
Found a baby blue jay on the ground. Not sure what to do with it.
πŸ‘︎ 37
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πŸ‘€︎ u/CriticalGeode
πŸ“…︎ Sep 23 2019
🚨︎ report
I wanted to write a parody of β€œBehind Blue Eyes” but my friend told me I should watch out for copyright laws

I said, β€œWho’s gonna sue me?”

πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/el-toro-loco
πŸ“…︎ Sep 01 2019
🚨︎ report
A blue man gives you a pineapple. A man with a horse for a head gives you a blender. A man with seven feet on each leg gives you a dragonfruit. What do you have?

Schizophrenia

πŸ‘︎ 40
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πŸ‘€︎ u/honolulu_oahu_mod
πŸ“…︎ Aug 10 2019
🚨︎ report
Why is it called hereditary depression and not blue genes?
πŸ‘︎ 67
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πŸ‘€︎ u/bot_10
πŸ“…︎ Oct 16 2019
🚨︎ report
Why is the ocean always blue?

Because the shore never waves back.

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/notdadbot
πŸ“…︎ Nov 17 2019
🚨︎ report
What is Blue and not heavy?

Light blue.

πŸ‘︎ 24
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/_Floydian
πŸ“…︎ Jul 14
🚨︎ report
What's blue and smells like red paint?

Blue paint

πŸ‘︎ 22
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Tinferbrains
πŸ“…︎ Jul 19
🚨︎ report
What's red and smells like blue paint

Red paint

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/HellsJuggernaut
πŸ“…︎ Aug 06
🚨︎ report
What's blue and not very heavy?

Light blue.

πŸ‘︎ 97
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/wendru
πŸ“…︎ Jun 07
🚨︎ report
What is red and smells like blue paint?

Red paint

πŸ‘︎ 15
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/DeletedForSpamm
πŸ“…︎ Jun 10
🚨︎ report
What's blue and not so heavy?

Light blue

πŸ‘︎ 56
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/oldgenmemelord
πŸ“…︎ Mar 21
🚨︎ report
What's red and smells like blue paint?

Red paint

πŸ‘︎ 745
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/broeshweehn
πŸ“…︎ Oct 29 2019
🚨︎ report
What's blue and not very heavy?

Light blue.

πŸ‘︎ 23
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Tungur_Knivur2020
πŸ“…︎ Mar 21
🚨︎ report
What’s blue and not heavy

Light blue

πŸ‘︎ 7k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/SximplyAJ
πŸ“…︎ Jun 03 2019
🚨︎ report
What’s blue and not very heavy?

Light blue.

πŸ‘︎ 15
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/MrScotty15
πŸ“…︎ Feb 13
🚨︎ report
What's blue and not very heavy?

Light blue.

πŸ‘︎ 35
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/notdadbot
πŸ“…︎ Nov 12 2019
🚨︎ report
If a Bluebird has blue-babies, and a blackbird has black-babies, what kind of bird has no-babies?

A Swallow.

πŸ‘︎ 2k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Qdontevenknow
πŸ“…︎ Apr 11 2019
🚨︎ report
What’s blue and not very heavy?

Light blue

πŸ‘︎ 284
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/TheKris11
πŸ“…︎ Aug 10 2019
🚨︎ report
What's blue and not very heavy?

Light blue.

πŸ‘︎ 10
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/notdadbot
πŸ“…︎ Nov 18 2019
🚨︎ report
What's blue and not very heavy?

Light blue.

πŸ‘︎ 62
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/SirComeSizedSeal
πŸ“…︎ Nov 04 2019
🚨︎ report
What's blue and not very heavy?

Light blue.

πŸ‘︎ 129
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/notdadbot
πŸ“…︎ Oct 30 2019
🚨︎ report
Whats blue and smells like red paint

blue paint

πŸ‘︎ 46
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Boop108
πŸ“…︎ Dec 13 2019
🚨︎ report
What's red and smells like blue paint?

Red paint

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/otesNmoney
πŸ“…︎ Dec 12 2019
🚨︎ report
What's red and smells like blue paint?

Red paint

πŸ‘︎ 7
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/MacItaly
πŸ“…︎ Dec 24 2019
🚨︎ report
What's red but smells like blue paint?

Red paint

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/GroundyBreak
πŸ“…︎ Oct 24 2019
🚨︎ report
What's blue and not very heavy?

Light blue.

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/notdadbot
πŸ“…︎ Nov 07 2019
🚨︎ report

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