they bandit
Because everyone in the empire works.. 'cept her.
...he just couldn't part with it.
An announcement
So since it didn't go in the vein, it was in vain
It’s a midwife crisis.
I was on the Crews' crew's crew cruise crew.
His office is run by a skeleton crew.
Now I have a temporary employee infection.
They were just following the chicken!
"Bred any good rooks lately?"
The blast was heard 3.146 miles away!
I finally snapped and told him to just put a lid on it
JK Rowling
Still only managed to get 10% off....
They take a poll.
I was shocked!
Elle GB tea queue
They all went on strike and the manager went spare.
Meals on wheels.
I was visiting the museum with a friend, when he jokingly asked the staff what they feed the mounted animals.
"I don't know what it is they eat," I said, "but they definitely eat a lot of it. You can tell, because they're stuffed."
He was out of patience.
A co-worker sent an all staff email today about a planning meeting. It said, "On Sunday it is the Ides of March. But what we really need is ideas for March. Ha ha ha." Never have so many people been dadjoked in one go.
strike!
Now he's miming his own business
They called Time on their careers
The information he was giving them was knead to know.
-
Accounts Payable Administrator_______________Imelda Czechs
-
Accounts Payable Clerk, Moscow Office__________Dasha Chekhov
-
Air-Quality Monitor _________________________Carmine Dioxide
-
Caffeine Addiction Counselor__________________Bruno Moore
-
Chief Legal Counsel_________________________ Hugh Louis Dewey of Dewey, Cheetham & Howe
-
Cliche Monitor_____________________________Saul Wellingood
-
Clothing Designer__________________________Hugh Jass
-
Credit Counselor___________________________Max Stout
-
Director of Purchasing_______________________Lois Bidder
-
Director of Pavlovian Research________________Isabelle Ringing
-
Divorce Attorney___________________________Carmine Nottyors
-
Dog Trainer_______________________________Don Chase Katz
-
Ebay Specialist____________________________Selma Junkoff
-
Head of Security___________________________Barb Dwyer
-
Global Economics Forecaster_________________Helena Handbasket
-
Marine Biologist___________________________Frieda Wales
-
Father-in-Law Liaison_______________________Royal Payne Diaz
-
Mother-in-Law Liaison______________________Stella Payne Diaz
-
Official Spokesperson_______________________Howie Vasive
-
Restroom Attendants_______________________Trudy Door & Donna Hall
-
Russian Chauffeur__________________________Picov Andropov
-
Scout Leader______________________________Lawson D. Woods
-
Shop Foreman_____________________________Luke Bizzy
-
Staff Intuitionist____________________________Ivan Inkling
-
Used Car Salesman_________________________Alexis Itznot
Full list can be found here: http://www.cartalk.com/content/staff-credits
To which I replied, "No, I'm here for Beethoven. Who the heck is Will Call?" Worth it for the few 'extra air out of the nose' laughs I got from the three people around me.
The Ritz Quackers
Happened during a reading of an extensive legal clause, containing several 'or this ..., or that ...' statements. The entire department is listening intently, ensuring nothing is missed.
When the speaker quietly chuckles about the 'or' multitude after finally reaching the end of the clause, the director speaks up: "Wow, that sentence should be mined!"
Groans around the room.
It’s a mid-wife crisis.
