The park ranger told me that he would donate all the pennies, nickles, and quarters thrown into the wishing well to my charity.....
I guess I shouldn't be surprised that he never gave me a single dime!
π︎ 7
π
︎ May 23 2021
I choked on a quarter last night
π︎ 16
π
︎ Apr 29 2021
I received a break-up note from a quarter.
π︎ 4
π
︎ Apr 10 2021
A soldier in WW2 was shot in the chest and the bullet was stopped by a stack of quarters in his pocket.
He said it was his life savings.
π︎ 34
π
︎ Mar 27 2021
Doctor: βHow is the boy who swallowed the quarter?β
Nurse: βNo change yetβ
π︎ 59
π
︎ Feb 11 2021
I won $6million in the lottery and have decided to donate a quarter of it to charity....
I now have $5.999,999,75c left.
π︎ 20
π
︎ Feb 26 2021
π︎ 159
π
︎ Nov 13 2020
The Lord of the Rings official pinball machine doesnβt take quarters.
π︎ 78
π
︎ Dec 06 2020
I won a $1million in the lottery last night and have decided to donate a quarter of it to charity.
I now have 999.999.75 left.
π︎ 7
π
︎ Jan 19 2021
I heard Frozen University is banning anyone who got the COVID vaccine from returning for the spring quarter
I guess if you get vaccinated you wonβt be headed to the ICU.
π︎ 2
π
︎ Dec 19 2020
My friend likes to convert all of his dollars into quarters.
π︎ 31
π
︎ Sep 01 2020
A mother was bribing her little boy with a quarter so he could behave..
βWhy do I always have to pay you to be goodβ
Why canβt you be a good for nothing like your dad
π︎ 5
π
︎ Nov 02 2020
What did the dollar say say to the 4 quarters
π︎ 66
π
︎ Jul 18 2020
Where do magicians get quarters?
π︎ 12
π
︎ Jul 20 2020
Mom complained when I asked for a few dollars in quarters to fill up my carβs tires.
Dad looked at me, shrugged and said βInflation.β
π︎ 5
π
︎ Sep 23 2020
My mom found a 1975 quarter online for $150. Hereβs how it went
i look up the coin online and it is worth $6 in mint condition and tell her the value
My mom: we should ask if theyβll negotiate
Me: we should buy it and see if we can flip it.
Iβm 16 and fear for my future kids.
π︎ 5
π
︎ Aug 31 2020
Somebody crop him in half for a quarter XD
π︎ 46
π
︎ Apr 24 2020
What do you call a cage filled with Quarters, Dimes, and Pennies?
π︎ 73
π
︎ Jan 30 2020
If I had $1,000,000, Iβd donate a quarter of it to charity.
Then Iβd have $999,999.75.
π︎ 6k
π
︎ Jul 06 2018
My friend minted quarters instead of going to class for the whole semester...
π︎ 6
π
︎ Jul 13 2020
Hehehe close quarters....
π︎ 137
π
︎ Nov 05 2019
I saw 2000 pounds of quarters the other day
π︎ 50
π
︎ Dec 20 2019
If the Super Bowl went into overtime, does that mean the first 4 quarters were just a really long commercial since the game was Tide?
I really hope Tide had another commercial ready just in case.
Edit: Thank you for the Reddit Gold, kind stranger! My first!
π︎ 17k
π
︎ Feb 06 2018
How come it used to cost a quarter to pump your tires at the gas station, and now it costs a dollar?
π︎ 27
π
︎ Feb 19 2020
I won a million dollars playing the lottery and donated a quarter of it to my favorite charity.
What should I do with the remaining $999,999.75?
π︎ 24
π
︎ Oct 22 2019
I made a βQuarter Pounderβ
π︎ 66
π
︎ May 26 2019
When I was young, my dad used to throw quarters at my head whenever I acted up.
He said, βMaybe thisβll knock some scents into you.β
π︎ 12
π
︎ Aug 02 2019
If a servant's quarters is too big....
It will be called a servant's whole
π︎ 7
π
︎ Dec 23 2019
When doing end of quarter inventory,
Any help you can get really counts.
π︎ 3
π
︎ Jan 06 2020
Im gonna start making batting cage business that only accepts pennies, dimes,quarters, half dollars, and dollar coins
Gonna call it Nickel-less Cage
π︎ 12
π
︎ Oct 30 2019
What do you call it when it rains quarters?
π︎ 13
π
︎ Sep 25 2019
Doctor: Nurse, how is that little girl doing who swallowed ten quarters last night?
π︎ 20
π
︎ Jun 25 2019
A man walks into the same bar every day at quarter past five...
You would think he'd learn to duck under it by now...
π︎ 5
π
︎ Oct 03 2019
I once threw a quarter into the San Andreas...
I have always wanted to be generous to a fault.
π︎ 78
π
︎ Oct 30 2018
Pennies and quarters rain from the sky
βWow!β I say. βItβs climate change!β
π︎ 53
π
︎ Oct 19 2018
I found what I suspect is a long-running dad joke in a drawer at my work. It's a quarter pounder.
imgur.com/go2fngq
π︎ 2k
π
︎ Sep 03 2013
Quarter Pounder
π︎ 5
π
︎ Dec 29 2018
If I won $300,000, I'd give a quarter of it to charity.
Not sure what I'd do with the other $299,999.75
π︎ 10
π
︎ Jun 14 2019
How many Quarter Pounders make a Big Mac?
None of them, they canβt cook.
π︎ 21
π
︎ Jan 28 2019
How does a quarter moon always feel?
π︎ 2
π
︎ Jun 23 2019
Milwaukee Bucks. The only bucks you can't get 4 quarters out of.
π︎ 4
π
︎ May 16 2019
Did you hear about the guy who got three quarters of his back removed?
Apparently, he's a quarterback now.
π︎ 8
π
︎ Nov 24 2018
π︎ 19
π
︎ Jun 25 2017
When I was younger, my Dad used to throw quarters at me whenever I acted stupidly.
He said, βMaybe thatβll knock some cents into you.β
π︎ 350
π
︎ Jun 13 2018
What do you call a cage full of dimes, pennies, and quarters?
π︎ 91
π
︎ Nov 19 2017
If I had $1,000,000, Iβd donate a quarter of it to charity.
Then Iβd have $999,999.75.
π︎ 3
π
︎ Jul 11 2019
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