Why will Kim Jong-un never use his nuclear weapons?

He's afraid it would cost him his Korea.

👍︎ 14
📅︎ Nov 20 2017
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My 4 year old just told her first dad joke, and I've never been more proud.

My pregnant wife is wearing a white shirt that has a pumpkin painted over her belly, for Halloween. We are having another little girl, and have set on the name Ellie.

My daughter comes home, and is greeted by my wife.

4yo: "I like your shirt mama!

Wife: "Aww thank you! Do you like my pumpkin belly?

4yo: "...I like your pumpkin Ellie!"

👍︎ 902
👤︎ u/Shade0217
📅︎ Oct 31 2020
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Do you know why the French eat just one egg for breakfast?

Because in France, one egg is Un ouef.

👍︎ 832
👤︎ u/Tamizander
📅︎ Oct 22 2020
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In space, two aliens are talking to each other.

The first alien says, "The dominant life forms on the Earth planet have developed satellite-based nuclear weapons."

The second alien asks, "Are they an emerging intelligence?"

The first alien says, "I don't think so, they have them aimed at themselves"

👍︎ 277
📅︎ Sep 12 2017
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