After this week's bad weather in Texas, there'll probably be a baby boom in nine months.

That snow coincidence.

πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/engfish
πŸ“…︎ Feb 19 2021
🚨︎ report
How do you turn six into nine?

Remove the β€œs”.

πŸ‘︎ 521
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πŸ‘€︎ u/sarcasticpremed
πŸ“…︎ Nov 29 2020
🚨︎ report
Traveling with my nine year old, and he observed that our gate in Hartford was A6, and our gate in Baltimore is B6. I respond that it's raining so hard we'll take a boat home...

...then we'll be C6.

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Sunstoned1
πŸ“…︎ Dec 20 2020
🚨︎ report
Called my local restaurant for reservation. Hey are you guys open for reservations? They replied four to nine today

Looks like they are too busy today

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/randombot777
πŸ“…︎ Jan 06 2021
🚨︎ report
What’s three, nine in Japanese?

Them: San kyu.

Me: You’re welcome.

πŸ‘︎ 32
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πŸ‘€︎ u/sarcasticpremed
πŸ“…︎ Nov 19 2020
🚨︎ report
The twelve days of Jokemas, day nine

What is a planet's favorite day of the week?

Saturnday

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Hud_is_on
πŸ“…︎ Dec 21 2020
🚨︎ report
If you take a dozen cows and get rid of two you'll have nine

There would be 10 but they lacked 8

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ“…︎ Oct 20 2020
🚨︎ report
Sent my dad a picture of animals gathered on a hill. β€œWild turkeys?” β€œNine deer, dad!”....

β€œI didn’t know you spoke German!” he replied

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/polkadotmcgot
πŸ“…︎ Oct 16 2020
🚨︎ report
Why is ten afraid of nine?

Because nine eight seven!

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ArcaneWizard1
πŸ“…︎ Sep 26 2020
🚨︎ report
πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/kvngjuggy
πŸ“…︎ Aug 30 2020
🚨︎ report
We know why 6 is afraid of seven, but why did seven eat nine?

Because you need three squared meals a day

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Shrek_007
πŸ“…︎ Sep 06 2020
🚨︎ report
If doing something two times is called Twice, what do we call doing something nine times?

Nice

πŸ‘︎ 14
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Doorbell28
πŸ“…︎ Aug 09 2020
🚨︎ report
Looking at a Terminix truck, the IX at the end are the roman numerals for the number nine...

Which is one more than eight. I feel this has to have been part of the name creation. β€œWe’ll do you one better than terminate, we’ll termiNINE”.

πŸ‘︎ 10
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Mchead22
πŸ“…︎ Aug 24 2020
🚨︎ report
What reality show is popular on the holodeck of Deep Space Nine?

Keeping up with the Cardassians!

πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/siphodeus
πŸ“…︎ Jul 16 2020
🚨︎ report
What has four letters, sometimes has nine, and never has five
πŸ‘︎ 8k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Eluceadtenebras
πŸ“…︎ Nov 04 2018
🚨︎ report
I got kicked out of karaoke after singing β€œDanger Zone” nine times in a row.

Too many Loggins attempts.

πŸ‘︎ 458
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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Dec 21 2019
🚨︎ report
the NINE LYNCH NAILS
πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Eh_Grips
πŸ“…︎ Apr 07 2020
🚨︎ report
How did nine, ten, eleven, twelve, and thirteen die?

Seven, eight, nine, ten, eleven, twelve and thirteen.

πŸ‘︎ 161
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πŸ‘€︎ u/dexlutha23
πŸ“…︎ Aug 20 2019
🚨︎ report
There used to be a game in Germany called nine.

It didn’t last long because no one ever agreed to play it.

πŸ‘︎ 14
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Murdock431
πŸ“…︎ Jan 01 2020
🚨︎ report
Nine ants were kicked out of the apartment complex

Because they were not tenants.

πŸ‘︎ 234
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πŸ‘€︎ u/SkyStar1991
πŸ“…︎ Nov 05 2019
🚨︎ report
Little known fact: Beethoven wrote nine symphonies.

And not one of them wrote back.

πŸ‘︎ 21
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πŸ‘€︎ u/jalfredproofrock
πŸ“…︎ Jan 20 2020
🚨︎ report
Don’t do it nine year olds.
πŸ‘︎ 26
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Ish778
πŸ“…︎ Sep 06 2019
🚨︎ report
Nine sodium molecules walk into a bar. Who comes next?

Batman.

πŸ‘︎ 34
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πŸ‘€︎ u/74NG3N7
πŸ“…︎ Aug 05 2019
🚨︎ report
A Nine year old girl has gone missing after using moisturiser that makes you look 10 years younger
πŸ‘︎ 68
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πŸ‘€︎ u/dylanthereidy
πŸ“…︎ May 03 2019
🚨︎ report
Why was 6 afraid of 7, because 789. Why did 7 eat nine? Because at the restaurant 7 was at, 9 came in that order.
πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Anti-vaxxer-hater
πŸ“…︎ Jun 09 2019
🚨︎ report
Why did seven assault nine?

He really heighted him

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/hoodiededumdum
πŸ“…︎ Sep 23 2019
🚨︎ report
Cats may have nine lives

But frogs croak every night.

πŸ‘︎ 13
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πŸ‘€︎ u/DrumSpace
πŸ“…︎ Jun 04 2019
🚨︎ report
My nine year old son’s Harry Potter humor
πŸ‘︎ 11
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πŸ‘€︎ u/rt09savage
πŸ“…︎ Apr 14 2019
🚨︎ report
If I tie my golf partner on the back nine...

...what is the best kind of rope to use?

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/slowshot
πŸ“…︎ Sep 03 2019
🚨︎ report
Why does the man want to buy nine rackets?

Cause tennis too many.

πŸ‘︎ 26
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Quint_Cordewener
πŸ“…︎ Jun 06 2019
🚨︎ report
What has nine arms and rocks?

Def Leppard!

πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/WhereFudgeIsMade
πŸ“…︎ Mar 08 2019
🚨︎ report
My nine year old's cat just gave birth to a huge litter! I asked her which she likes best...

She replied, "I love the whole kitten caboodle!"

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Jun 28 2019
🚨︎ report
I was carrying a nine-foot book the other day and a woman asked what I was doing.

I said β€œOh it’s a long story.”

πŸ‘︎ 20
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πŸ‘€︎ u/lucidus_somniorum
πŸ“…︎ Feb 01 2019
🚨︎ report
what do you call a nine iron between two pieces of bred?

A club sandwich

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Conviction666
πŸ“…︎ Jan 28 2019
🚨︎ report
What has four letters, sometimes has nine, but never has five
πŸ‘︎ 237
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πŸ“…︎ Aug 07 2019
🚨︎ report
What is between nine and ten?

And.

πŸ‘︎ 64
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πŸ“…︎ Jul 28 2019
🚨︎ report
What has four, sometimes have nine and never has five.
πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/thisisekom
πŸ“…︎ Aug 09 2019
🚨︎ report
Beethoven wrote nine symphonies. And not one of them wrote back.
πŸ‘︎ 13
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πŸ‘€︎ u/jalfredproofrock
πŸ“…︎ Oct 08 2019
🚨︎ report
A nine year old girl has disappeared after using a moisturiser that makes you look ten years younger!
πŸ‘︎ 66
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πŸ‘€︎ u/hughdman
πŸ“…︎ Nov 13 2018
🚨︎ report
What has four letters, sometimes has nine letters, but never has five letters.

There’s no question.

πŸ‘︎ 27
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Some_person2101
πŸ“…︎ Aug 17 2018
🚨︎ report
Wanna know why I bought nine rackets?

Cause tennis too many.

πŸ‘︎ 11
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πŸ‘€︎ u/CulturedGrass
πŸ“…︎ Jun 18 2019
🚨︎ report
Six was afraid of seven because seven eight (ate) nine. But why did seven eat nine?

Because you’re supposed to eat three squared meals a day.

πŸ‘︎ 126
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πŸ‘€︎ u/0N3WH0KN0CK5
πŸ“…︎ Oct 09 2017
🚨︎ report

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