Did you hear about the soldier who got hit with mustard gas and pepper spray?

He's a seasoned veteran

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πŸ‘€︎ u/icemage27
πŸ“…︎ Nov 28 2020
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My Grandfather survived Pepper spray and Mustard gas attacks in two wars...

... And came home to us a seasoned Veteran.

Edit : To use a war pun.. " Wow, this really blew up " ...Thanks to all for contributing to this bit of fun. I feel like Granddad now with all the medals.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/HugoZHackenbush2
πŸ“…︎ Jun 29 2020
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What do you call mustard native to an area?

Indijonous mustard.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/French_Embassy
πŸ“…︎ Dec 18 2020
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Why should you put mustard on a puppy with a fever?

Because it's the best thing for a hot dog

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πŸ‘€︎ u/RedLMR56
πŸ“…︎ Aug 16 2020
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A singer known for her show in Las Vegas has introduced a line of gourmet mustard...

Celine Dijon

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πŸ‘€︎ u/andersonfmly
πŸ“…︎ Oct 16 2020
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I thought I dipped my tortilla chip into a bowl of cheese sauce, but it turned out to be honey mustard.

It was a queso mistaken identity.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/FinalCaveat
πŸ“…︎ Aug 15 2020
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I hadn’t seen my friend Mustard in a year

It was great to ketchup with him

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πŸ“…︎ Jun 30 2020
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What did the mustard say to the other sauce when they went for a run?

Ketch up

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πŸ‘€︎ u/liverpool135
πŸ“…︎ Jul 13 2020
🚨︎ report
If Mustard cured constipation .....

They'd have to spell it different.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/PotBuzz
πŸ“…︎ Jan 07 2020
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Don’t sit near Mustard...

He has the worst gas.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/AngusB3ll3
πŸ“…︎ May 19 2020
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People, musTARD is not an appropriate thing to say

Please guys, refer as condimentally challenged

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πŸ‘€︎ u/triple_yoi
πŸ“…︎ Jan 25 2020
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Gordon Ramsay once survived a mustard-gas attack when he was in the army. Then, he got pepper-sprayed whilst at a protest.

You could say that he is relished among the cooking community, and truly a seasoned veteran

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πŸ‘€︎ u/dg_zano
πŸ“…︎ Feb 14 2020
🚨︎ report
I had a meal recently that was made with ketchup and mustard.

It was delicious! My condiments to the chef!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Escalade1414
πŸ“…︎ Feb 16 2020
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Family group chat asking my Dad about the giant bottle of Mustard he bought

A pump? No, I just refill a smaller squeeze bottle to fit in the fridge.. but I relish all the comments you guys made. - Bryan (59)

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Hali_Stallions
πŸ“…︎ Mar 18 2020
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Someone asked me recently why I don't put any ketchup or mustard on my hotdog

And I told them it's because I just wanna relish it.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/trollcitybandit
πŸ“…︎ Oct 16 2019
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What did mustard say when ketchup got glasses?

Heinz sight is 20/20

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πŸ‘€︎ u/adamhoolhorst
πŸ“…︎ Aug 24 2019
🚨︎ report
I'm lucky to have survived Mustard gas and pepper spay when I was in the Army.

I guess you could say that I'm a seasoned vet...

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πŸ“…︎ Dec 24 2018
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Soldier survives mustard gas at war, only to be pepper sprayed and assalted by police back home.

He is now a properly seasoned veteran.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/cuban_sailor
πŸ“…︎ Jun 22 2018
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What did the mustard say to the ketchup

I RELISH the fact that you MUSTERED the strength to KATCH-UP to me

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πŸ‘€︎ u/seamouse05
πŸ“…︎ Mar 20 2019
🚨︎ report
Forgetful Francesca had a lot of items on her list as she headed to the Super Store... celery, cinnamon, oatmeal, mint, mustard and chocolate.

Upon arrival, she couldn't remember which were groceries and which were paint colors.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Feb 06 2019
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The woman at Subway asked what condiments I wanted. I said everything but mustard.

She said "We don't have butt mustard."

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πŸ‘€︎ u/mrsizlbiz
πŸ“…︎ Feb 13 2019
🚨︎ report
Where do ketchup and mustard live?

In the condiment-iums

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πŸ‘€︎ u/BladedVengence
πŸ“…︎ Jan 07 2019
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I don’t celebrate Cinco de Mayo, but I do celebrate Seis de Mustard.
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πŸ“…︎ May 05 2018
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Why did mustard start walking slower?

Because his friend couldn't ketch up

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πŸ‘€︎ u/PCreeper394
πŸ“…︎ Sep 08 2016
🚨︎ report
The sandwich asked mustard why he was so late...

...and his only excuse was that he wasn't prepared.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/warpedddd
πŸ“…︎ Nov 28 2018
🚨︎ report
Did you hear ketchup and mustard are moving in together?

They're renting a condimentium.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/meelakie
πŸ“…︎ Jul 14 2017
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What type of mustard sings?
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Exos_VII
πŸ“…︎ Oct 29 2017
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Canadian mustard by Celine
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πŸ‘€︎ u/SWEJO
πŸ“…︎ Dec 22 2014
🚨︎ report
How did the mustard begin her break up letter to her husband?

"Dijon...."

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πŸ‘€︎ u/azureal
πŸ“…︎ Dec 25 2015
🚨︎ report
My sister dropped the mustard while making a sandwich

"My hands were slippery from the meat."

"Baloney."

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πŸ‘€︎ u/ULiopleurodon
πŸ“…︎ Feb 13 2016
🚨︎ report
Did you hear about the solider that got hit with mustard gas and pepper spray?

He’s now a seasoned veteran

πŸ‘︎ 127
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πŸ‘€︎ u/CuteBearLegs
πŸ“…︎ Oct 16 2020
🚨︎ report
The soldier who survived mustard gas and pepper spray was a seasoned veteran.
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πŸ‘€︎ u/kickypie
πŸ“…︎ Aug 09 2020
🚨︎ report
What do you call a soldier who has survived mustard gas and pepper spray?

A seasoned veteran

πŸ‘︎ 100
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πŸ‘€︎ u/liverpool135
πŸ“…︎ Jul 16 2020
🚨︎ report
The soldier who survived mustard gas and pepper spray was a seasoned veteran.
πŸ‘︎ 13
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πŸ‘€︎ u/kickypie
πŸ“…︎ May 26 2020
🚨︎ report
a soldier once survived pepper spray and mustard gas

he was a seasoned veteran

πŸ‘︎ 365
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Galeelo
πŸ“…︎ Sep 07 2019
🚨︎ report
I thought I dipped my tortilla chip into a bowl of cheese sauce, but it turned out to be honey mustard.

It was a queso mistaken identity.

πŸ‘︎ 89
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πŸ‘€︎ u/FinalCaveat
πŸ“…︎ Oct 08 2019
🚨︎ report
My soldier friend was doused with pepper spray and also survived a mustard gas attack.

Now he's a seasoned veteran.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/stevehrowe2
πŸ“…︎ Jun 18 2019
🚨︎ report
My grandad was assaulted in the war with pepper spray and mustard gas.

He's a seasoned veteran

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πŸ‘€︎ u/ABOYCALLEDBRYAN
πŸ“…︎ Jul 22 2019
🚨︎ report
The soldier who survived mustard-gas and pepper-spray....

Is now a seasoned veteran

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πŸ‘€︎ u/androidlowbattery
πŸ“…︎ Oct 10 2018
🚨︎ report
A soldier survived mustard gas in battle, and then pepper spray by the police.

He's now a seasoned veteran.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/ntuso
πŸ“…︎ Jan 14 2019
🚨︎ report
I saw a soldier who survived Mustard Gas and Pepper Spray

I guess you could say he's now a seasoned veteran

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πŸ‘€︎ u/vibronicpoppy82
πŸ“…︎ Apr 20 2017
🚨︎ report
The soldiers who survived mustard gas and pepper sprays

Are seasoned veterans.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/ViperVein
πŸ“…︎ Jun 15 2019
🚨︎ report
The military man survived mustard gas and pepper spray

He was a seasoned veteran

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πŸ‘€︎ u/UchihaDivergent
πŸ“…︎ Jun 29 2017
🚨︎ report
A soldier who survived mustard gas and pepper spray is now a seasoned veteran
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πŸ‘€︎ u/moses10960
πŸ“…︎ Aug 22 2017
🚨︎ report
The same mustard as before.

Dijon vu

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πŸ‘€︎ u/MilPens
πŸ“…︎ Mar 17 2018
🚨︎ report
What do you call a soldier that survived mustard gas and pepper spray?

A seasoned veteran

πŸ‘︎ 41
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πŸ‘€︎ u/StickyBamboo_
πŸ“…︎ Dec 11 2017
🚨︎ report

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