Did you hear about the guy trying out for editor for the sums series of Math Magazine?
It was an addition edition audition.
Playboy are coming out with a new magazine, especially for married men.
Every month it's exactly the same woman.
American Airlines Magazine Cover: Unsung Heroes - Sandwiches you’ve never heard of but need to try
I fell asleep last night while reading some old magazines.
I woke up with back issues.
My glitch happened when I forgot to renew my subscription to a weekly news magazine based in New York City.
I recently subscribed to a nice little magazine about steaks.
It's a rare medium well done.
What do you get if you have a subsciption to a magazine that is all about fathers?
Dad, Son, and Magazine
Dad, here in this magazine it is written that masturbation significantly weakens sight. Is it true? He replies: Read for me. I can’t find my glasses anywhere.
A year ago, I got a subscription to a magazine for mentally ill people.
What does Playboy use to print their magazines?
What kind of magazines do cows read?
A friend of mine offered me a piece of a pizza made out of a magazine that's no longer published. Hesitant at first, it turned out to be tasty!
My boss yelled at me for cutting articles out of a magazine at work.
He said to do it on my own Time.
What magazine does the Big Bad Wolf like to read?
Saw these two magazines next to each other at Target and couldn’t help myself.
Googles meme magazines. Finds this.
What type of magazines do cows read?
Pennywise the clown is listed in Forbes magazine, for what It's worth.
I'm an avid subscriber to Father Magazine.
I guess you could say I've got Daddy issues.
My doctor recommended I sleep on a stack of old magazines.
I bought a porn mag company and I'm making it into a Christian magazine.
I'm still working out a few kinks
What do you call the staff of a British fashion and lifestyle magazine waiting for a warm beverage?
A man named Nicholas Justin retires early from his job at a prominent magazine
At the retirement party, his boss says, "You might be getting to the next stage in your life early, but you'll always be Justin, the Nick of Time."
I called Serena Williams to interview her for a magazine article and asked, “So Serena, What’s your favorite planet?”
Her: It’s Venus.
Me: I’m sorry Venus. Could you put Serena on the phone?
I once dated a girl that collected magazines.
But she had too many issues.
What did the waiter say when a man blamed him for losing his magazine?
Sorry sir we are not responsible for lost any articles.
Why does Dwayne Johnson sleep under a pile of magazines?
My dad recieved a phone call from the magazine "Runner's World"
women on the phone asks:
- "is (mother) home?"
- dad: "no, she just ran off"
- women: "oh, ok"
I dont think she got it.
edit: This is actually funnier how he said it in dutch (our native language). his words were "ze heeft ze benen genomen" which literally means " she has taken the legs".
I don't get to read magazines often,
My friend told me a story of how his little brother ate pages of a magazine and I asked if it was Readers Digest.
I’m too proud of myself to not tell anyone. I honestly think it was like one of those jokes that you come up with after the opportunity has passed, accept this time I thought of it quick enough. I hope this doesn’t appear as self-aggrandizement, I just think it was a good pun.
I once dated a magazine collector.
Let me tell you,she had some issues.
Me to daughter: Do you read any magazines?
Daughter: Yes I do... periodically.
Dang! Reverse dad joke!
Found this cute sheruff in a magazine.
What is the most popular gardening magazine in the world?
I told my son that I was looking through a car magazine. "I'm thinking about buying you one..." I told him.
He said, "Oh my god! But...I need to pass my test first."
I said, "No, you don't, it's only a magazine."
What type of magazine do cows read?
subscribe to Dad Magazine!
#1 magazine for “pop” culture.
My dad, Paul, was interviewed for the union magazine where he works. I feel sorry for the guy who interviewed him.
Here's a scanned excerpt, via Imgur.
Transcript (Important part in boldface):
Extremely pragmatic and frugal in nature -- "a lot of stuff I see people buying is completely nonessential" -- Paul has a soft spot for absolutely any joke, and the more esoteric, the better. Instead of his proper name on his office template, "The Buck Stops Here" appears. The other day, he stopped me in the hallway and asked "What will the people carrying the coffin at my funeral be called?"
I wait.
"Paul bearers", he declares, followed by a knee-slapping hearty guffaw.
EDIT: Fixed Imgur link.
There's a printed magazine for nearly every topic and subject, including all about fatherhood!
But it's just a crying shame none of them are called "Daddy Issues"
I used to date this magazine...
... But she had too many issues.
Newsweek magazine laid off some staff recently
They called Time on their careers
The magazine my daughter gets each month always smells like maple syrup. I wondered aloud if they scent it.
Then I realized, of course they sent it. Otherwise it would have never come.
The table in a waiting room where they have magazines for you to browse is a periodical table.
What magazines to cows read?
What magazine does the big bad wolf like to read?
What kind of magazines do cows read?
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