I asked my colleague if she had any bulldog clips.

She said "No, but I've got a nice video of a Jack Russell."

👍︎ 5
💬︎
📅︎ May 22 2021
🚨︎ report
Clip, Clip Clip. Clop Clop Clop. Clip Clip Clip.

SOS in Horse Code.

👍︎ 7
💬︎
👤︎ u/VERBERD
📅︎ Apr 28 2021
🚨︎ report
What goes clip-clop bang, clip-clop bang?

An Amish drive by

👍︎ 8
💬︎
👤︎ u/JRAM1991
📅︎ May 09 2021
🚨︎ report
Had the wife stop the movie to watch a quick clip. After she sat down I told her" You could cut the dogs feet off".

She said "I don't understand.....".

I said " UN-PAUSE".

I had to explain it to her...

👍︎ 15
💬︎
👤︎ u/JJJoyce
📅︎ Oct 30 2020
🚨︎ report
Without saran wrap or bread clips.

Our lives would be very stale

👍︎ 3
💬︎
📅︎ Nov 27 2020
🚨︎ report
These comments where from a clip where someone cleaning at a foreign range almost gets hit by a stray bullet
👍︎ 8
💬︎
📅︎ Sep 15 2020
🚨︎ report
What goes clip clop, clip clop, clip clop, BANG, BANG, BANG?

An Amish drive by shooting.

👍︎ 13
💬︎
📅︎ Sep 20 2020
🚨︎ report
So, my mum lost a few hair clips...

I eventually found all three of them sitting on the hearth in front of the fireplace.

My dad, being the joker he is, promptly said "There's nothing I can say. In total, three clips on the hearth."

Your humour is amazing, dads

👍︎ 3
💬︎
📅︎ Jun 28 2020
🚨︎ report
What goes "clip-clop-clip-clop-bang?"

An Amish drive-by.

👍︎ 11
💬︎
👤︎ u/kickypie
📅︎ Mar 05 2020
🚨︎ report
Clip art
👍︎ 25
💬︎
👤︎ u/burtybob92
📅︎ Aug 31 2019
🚨︎ report
What did the bartender say to the alligator clips?

Don't you try to start anything.

The funny thing is that one of the was already charged and the other one was grounded

👍︎ 10
💬︎
📅︎ Dec 19 2019
🚨︎ report
A clip off the old block
👍︎ 7
💬︎
👤︎ u/dis_newt02
📅︎ Oct 05 2019
🚨︎ report
Condom commercials should just be a short clip of a couple trying to enjoy a nice meal in public with children.
👍︎ 17
💬︎
📅︎ Jul 19 2019
🚨︎ report
On a clip of clams lurching around on a plate
👍︎ 2
💬︎
📅︎ Jun 12 2019
🚨︎ report
Clip art
👍︎ 48
💬︎
👤︎ u/samimac03
📅︎ Jun 07 2018
🚨︎ report
Why is a roach clip called a roach clup?

Because potholder was taken.

Edit:clip,not clup.

👍︎ 5
💬︎
👤︎ u/shdchko
📅︎ Sep 12 2019
🚨︎ report
Crime is getting worse where I live, so my dad decided to give me some protection and boxed up his trusty 9mm, a big and a small clip and a bunch of shells for me! [Xpost /r/funny]

https://imgur.com/2ylrnpK

👍︎ 89
💬︎
👤︎ u/lindymad
📅︎ Jan 13 2016
🚨︎ report
Why isn't there a monthly magazine about guns called Clip?
👍︎ 2
💬︎
📅︎ Jul 14 2016
🚨︎ report
My co-worker dumped a small box of rubber bands looking for a paper clip. My other co-worker comes into the office and asks what happened to the rubber bands.

I responded with "It must have been that darn rubber bandit again!" That was my first really quick dad joker that I actually got complimented on!

👍︎ 3
💬︎
👤︎ u/ralyks
📅︎ Oct 22 2016
🚨︎ report
Dad dropped this one on us yesterday when we were watching a video clip of someone crashing his race car.

Presenter: "The driver sustained no permanent injuries."
Dad: "Because he died?"

👍︎ 3
💬︎
👤︎ u/S1nth0raS
📅︎ Mar 16 2014
🚨︎ report
My local news anchor this morning regarding a car driving into a Great Clips

"It was a hairy situation at Great Clips..."

It took me a second to catch it but when I did I had to chuckle.

👍︎ 2
💬︎
👤︎ u/KCP100
📅︎ Jan 16 2014
🚨︎ report
What goes "Clip clop, clip clop, clip clop, clip clop, TWANG clip clop, clip clop, clip clop, clip clop"?

An Amish driveby.

👍︎ 5
💬︎
📅︎ Sep 04 2019
🚨︎ report

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.