Found in the April 2020 Mod Newsletter
👍︎ 5
👤︎ u/liltrigger
📅︎ May 05 2020
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My daughter caught me reading one of those coupon newsletters they send from the local grocery store...

Her: "Why are you reading junk mail?"

Me: "It's not, they have real news in here too."

Her: "No they don't...."

Me: "They sure do. I was just reading about a hitman who killed 3 people. He must not have liked them much, because he did it for only $1."

Her: "Nuh-uh, you're totally lying!"

Me: "Nope, looks like the hitman was named was Arty. He choked them to death apparently. "

Her: "Let me see..."

So I showed her the section I was reading:


👍︎ 146
👤︎ u/Tjohn184
📅︎ Aug 29 2019
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A newsletter from our local MP in West Melbourne, Tim Watts
👍︎ 3
📅︎ Apr 01 2019
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Read this joke in a local newsletter and just found it hilarious.

What kind of fish can't swim? Dead ones.

👍︎ 21
📅︎ Nov 10 2013
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Someone posted a joke on inauguration day and now I can't stop thinking of Trump puns, so I'll just dump them here.

He probably has quite the hair-care bill, but I'm sure he's willing toupee for it.
It seems that everyone on the internet is Russian to say good things about him.
After his inauguration speech, everyone gave him a big hand.
His favorite winter Olympic event is the LYUUUUGE!
The other half of his supporters can be described with ancient, mystical legends: the Deep Lore-ables.
Nobody will be able to use cheap cotton drapes or table cloths after his ban on muslins.
Since the start of the cold war, many U.S. presidents have pissed off the Russians. Trump is the first to be accused of pissing ON them.
I subscribed to his newsletter because I never turn down a free MAGA-zine subscription.
Melania got used to everyone crowded into Trump Tower during the campaign. Now that everyone's gone, she looks around and it's just a little Barron.
Joke that inspired me is here :

👍︎ 4
📅︎ Jan 23 2017
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Need help coming up with a pizza pun

Sorry that this isn't a joke itself but my pizza place is making a newsletter and I need to come up with a punny name for it. So far the front runner is MozzarelLA Times

👍︎ 6
📅︎ Jun 30 2016
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My dad trying to cover up his bad grammar

I was editing a newsletter he wrote and pointed out that he needed a period

Dad: "Why didn't the sentence have a period?"

Me: ...

Dad: "Because it was pregnant!"

👍︎ 6
📅︎ Oct 06 2013
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