The table in a waiting room where they have magazines for you to browse is a periodical table.
πŸ‘︎ 34
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/SirUtnut
πŸ“…︎ Jul 10 2015
🚨︎ report
I need your jokes

My gf is on her period. I have been telling her all day period puns and jokes. I am all out and i need your help

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/FellowCat69
πŸ“…︎ Jul 04
🚨︎ report
My wife made a graph to track her periods.

It's a flow chart.

πŸ‘︎ 15
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/hybridtheory1331
πŸ“…︎ Jul 30
🚨︎ report
Did you hear about the keyboard that lost it's Period Key?

He was missing the point

πŸ‘︎ 6
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/-Llama58-
πŸ“…︎ Aug 06
🚨︎ report
Period
πŸ‘︎ 35
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/D1SGUST1PAT3D
πŸ“…︎ Jun 28
🚨︎ report
A good pun requires periodic timing
πŸ‘︎ 109
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/atastycooky
πŸ“…︎ Apr 03
🚨︎ report
I don’t hate ALL of the periodic table.

Just elements of it

πŸ‘︎ 104
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Titsonafish
πŸ“…︎ Apr 22
🚨︎ report
What do I say to my gf when she's on her periods and is flipping out on every damn thing I say?

Your ovary-acting.

πŸ‘︎ 10
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/shaanman
πŸ“…︎ Jun 24
🚨︎ report
Why is it so hard to make an appointment at the library?

They're always booked.

πŸ‘︎ 23
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/FuriousStyles13
πŸ“…︎ Jul 11
🚨︎ report
I tried to name a period of 24 hours.

I had to call it a day.

πŸ‘︎ 7
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/BuurmanSnoek
πŸ“…︎ Jun 14
🚨︎ report
I asked a zoologist about the gestation period of pachyderms... .

He said he didn't want to talk about the elephant in the womb

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/AustralianGroan
πŸ“…︎ Jun 19
🚨︎ report
Periods aren't bad

Its just women's ovary acting

πŸ‘︎ 7
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Shaurya_Jain
πŸ“…︎ May 13
🚨︎ report
From sunrise to sunset, I couldn't remember the name for a 24 hour time period. I finally did.

Then I called it a day.

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/CIMMGW
πŸ“…︎ Jun 08
🚨︎ report
The chemist who created the periodic table was stumped during his process of developing the table. Suddenly, he realized:

He was missing a key element the whole time

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/AnthMaster7
πŸ“…︎ May 12
🚨︎ report
So my girlfriend had her period today

Guess it’s happy not a Mother’s Day

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Star_Lord98
πŸ“…︎ May 10
🚨︎ report
For the last few months, I’ve been noticing that my teenage son periodically breaks into hives.

I have no idea why he hates bees so much.

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ May 07
🚨︎ report
I also enjoy eating lunch on a periodic table
πŸ‘︎ 51
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/iknowthisischeesy
πŸ“…︎ Dec 18 2019
🚨︎ report
Which periodic element is the worst swimmer?

Zink

πŸ‘︎ 14
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Eliastw03
πŸ“…︎ Apr 04
🚨︎ report
I wanted to post something here for National Periodic Table Day...

But I'm out of my element.

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Feb 07
🚨︎ report
I've created a simple and cheap period tracker

There it is -> .

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/JawnsDoesReddit
πŸ“…︎ Apr 23
🚨︎ report
How often to female prisoners get their period?

Only at the end of their sentence.

πŸ‘︎ 7
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/mr_wilson3
πŸ“…︎ Mar 02
🚨︎ report
Electricians during this rough period...

Just as a matter of interest will Electricians be "self isolating" under the "current" situation and staying at "Ohm" ?

πŸ‘︎ 7
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/andyginn12
πŸ“…︎ Mar 18
🚨︎ report
What do you call a low-quality Russian composer, pianist, and conductor of the late Romantic period?

Knockmaninoff

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/TheLeakestWink
πŸ“…︎ Mar 15
🚨︎ report
Half our class is gone so it’s a free period
πŸ‘︎ 223
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Stoppablefish8
πŸ“…︎ Sep 30 2019
🚨︎ report
Periodic
πŸ‘︎ 8
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Ethan-555-
πŸ“…︎ Jan 13
🚨︎ report
Page 44), β€œThe Periodic Table”
πŸ‘︎ 11
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/davetell2
πŸ“…︎ Jan 04
🚨︎ report
My daughter got scared when she had her first period

I told her it was an ovary action.

πŸ‘︎ 67
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/milkchaser
πŸ“…︎ Oct 23 2019
🚨︎ report
A periodic table
πŸ‘︎ 3k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/periwinke
πŸ“…︎ Sep 07 2018
🚨︎ report
I didn't want to observe the period from Ash Wednesday to Easter again, but did so to stop my girlfriend's constant nagging...

I re-Lent-ed

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Jan 28
🚨︎ report
What's the difference between a "male" and a "female"?

Iron.

πŸ‘︎ 58
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Jun 05
🚨︎ report
Being horny on your period is basically bloodlust
πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/hasitsung
πŸ“…︎ Oct 11 2019
🚨︎ report
I have updated the alphabet for festive period. A, B, C, D, E, F, G, H, I, J, K, M, N, O, P, Q, R, S, T, U, V, W, X, Y, Z

No-el no-L

πŸ‘︎ 14
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/RikM
πŸ“…︎ Dec 11 2019
🚨︎ report
I periodically come across jokes such as these...
πŸ‘︎ 7
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/BearAssault101
πŸ“…︎ Nov 10 2019
🚨︎ report
I shower periodically.
πŸ‘︎ 4k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Dankmonseiur69
πŸ“…︎ Jan 19 2018
🚨︎ report
You'll get a reaction out of this....

Anyone who makes a pun about iron should pay a periodic Fe, I would stop now but that'd be Nobel of me, HeHeHe. Be sure to take a deep breath before you say "NO". At this point you might thinking we should get Iridium of this guy in rl too. I'll eventually run out of chemical puns, right? Na, which might be your mood coincidentally. This guy must be a fake as Silicone, he got this from somewhere to which I reply, Si, senor! I Cu calling for the coppers, but any "Bro" of mine wouldn't. Don't worry, the best ones Argon by now. Au reading this! This winding list is surely golden by now, right?

As we close this out, allow me to echo your thoughts one last time, Fr y'all.

"F"In"Al"Y"

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Vadea_Shepard
πŸ“…︎ Aug 21
🚨︎ report
Why do women only rap on their periods?

Because they have a mad flow.

πŸ‘︎ 70
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/mattman8326
πŸ“…︎ Sep 13 2019
🚨︎ report
How do you embarrass an archeologist?

Give him a used tampon and ask him which period it came from.

πŸ‘︎ 7
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Jul 24
🚨︎ report
What did God say when he created a 24 hour period of alternating day and night?

Call it a day

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/oxfordthethird
πŸ“…︎ Nov 19 2019
🚨︎ report
I put up a random movie, turns out it was about the invention of the tampon

I didn’t expect it to be a period piece

πŸ‘︎ 12
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/lurebat
πŸ“…︎ Aug 07
🚨︎ report
Did you see the movie about the invention of tampons?

Yeah, it's a period piece.

πŸ‘︎ 24
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/CAD8033
πŸ“…︎ Jul 02
🚨︎ report
How often do people who study scientific elements tell dad jokes?

Periodically

πŸ‘︎ 87
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/MansNotHot772
πŸ“…︎ Jun 14
🚨︎ report
Someone cut a periodic table in half and the while neighborhood exploded

Shouldn’t have been splitting atoms

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/RoYaL_Lucifer69
πŸ“…︎ Oct 17 2019
🚨︎ report
Did you hear about the female rapper who only rapped when she was on her period?

They say she had a mean flow.

πŸ‘︎ 103
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/safwan070
πŸ“…︎ Feb 13 2019
🚨︎ report
A periodic table
πŸ‘︎ 36
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/NateMonsune
πŸ“…︎ Dec 29 2018
🚨︎ report
My dad is a chemist

He tells jokes periodically

Edit: spelling

πŸ‘︎ 11
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/mndaver24
πŸ“…︎ Jul 06
🚨︎ report
So my GF and I were talking about the periodic table today:

Me: Do you know the symbol for Potassium?

GF: Let me think about it....

Me: K.

GF: No seriously don't tell me.

Me: K.

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Santiago__Dunbar
πŸ“…︎ Sep 24 2019
🚨︎ report
I asked my dad if he knew what the symbol for Sodium was on the periodic table.

He said Na.

Can someone please tell me!!

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/mrbrisco
πŸ“…︎ Sep 12 2019
🚨︎ report
What did people call their mothers during the Edo period in Japan?

Edomommy

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Kirito_Beleren
πŸ“…︎ Jul 12 2019
🚨︎ report
If you tell people "na" periodically it will just end up making them salty.
πŸ‘︎ 7
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/arcadesdude
πŸ“…︎ Nov 11 2018
🚨︎ report
Periodic table
πŸ‘︎ 456
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/scottbrands
πŸ“…︎ Dec 23 2017
🚨︎ report
My daughter had her first period today

I told her not to ovaryact

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Charn22
πŸ“…︎ Sep 02 2019
🚨︎ report
TIL: To have an outlet for his aggression, Gandhi used to organize periodic food fights.

It was Naan violence.

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Jun 22 2019
🚨︎ report
Periodic Table Pun

Why is the element Sb poor? Because it is antimony.

The pun is basically about an element in the periodic table which is called antimony and whose symbol is Sb this is basically playing with words that Sb is anti-money and that's why it is poor.

Variations can be Sb is anti-capitalist. But anyways.

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/ganesh003
πŸ“…︎ Oct 18 2018
🚨︎ report
Periodic table
πŸ‘︎ 15
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/GetJackHere
πŸ“…︎ Sep 09 2018
🚨︎ report
I heard on the news earlier today that Scientists have officially added something new to the Periodic Table.

Designated by the letters AH, it is of course the Element of Surprise.

πŸ‘︎ 7
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/MusicianNerd26
πŸ“…︎ Jul 09 2019
🚨︎ report
A period and a decimal use the same symbol

Let me know if I should stop this joke or break it down further

πŸ‘︎ 7
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Ashtehstampede
πŸ“…︎ Jul 09 2019
🚨︎ report
Every month, I get a phase in which I make a lot of jokes about the +7 OS of iodine.

I make periodic periodic jokes.

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Apr 04
🚨︎ report
Periods are important.
πŸ‘︎ 6
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/FirstlawGaming
πŸ“…︎ Jan 05 2019
🚨︎ report
A prisoner's favorite punctuation mark is the period.

It marks the end of his sentence

πŸ‘︎ 320
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/geomads
πŸ“…︎ Jun 06 2018
🚨︎ report
What did the elements of the periodic table say when they heard that Oxygen and Potassium were going on a date?

OK.

πŸ‘︎ 10
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Enhanced_35
πŸ“…︎ May 03 2019
🚨︎ report
Whenever my wife's on her period, she does this weird thing where she calls me up and just exhales deeply…

It's probably her menstrual sigh call…

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/honolulu_oahu_mod
πŸ“…︎ Jun 30 2019
🚨︎ report
PMS jokes aren't funny. Period.
πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/EvilFSSOMG
πŸ“…︎ May 15 2019
🚨︎ report
I post science puns but only periodically.
πŸ‘︎ 25
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Stone_Miner_1225
πŸ“…︎ Sep 25 2018
🚨︎ report
A* Chemistry

I gave my students a periodic table test out of the blue.

They all got poor marks. I was so disappointed.

I thought we'd mastered the element of surprise.

πŸ‘︎ 8
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Coronabeer67843
πŸ“…︎ May 06
🚨︎ report
A little periodic table pun

A little tip: When you’re out eating with friends and they ask if you want salt or not,all you gotta say is β€˜Yea’ or β€˜Na’.

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/kristalleis_
πŸ“…︎ Jan 12 2019
🚨︎ report
My wife can only breastfeed our baby for short periods of time.

Her doctor says it’s because of her short term mammary.

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/evetSgiB
πŸ“…︎ May 16 2019
🚨︎ report
What do you call a restaurant patio that’s only open sometimes?

A periodic table.

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/MansNotHot772
πŸ“…︎ Jul 02
🚨︎ report
Jane Austen IS best known for period drama.
πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/teejango
πŸ“…︎ Feb 27 2019
🚨︎ report
The date of a prisoner's freedom should be called a period

because it's the end of their sentence.

πŸ‘︎ 17
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/gamgam777
πŸ“…︎ Feb 25 2019
🚨︎ report
What do historians call the period of time in which many parents left their infant children behind?

The orphanAGE

πŸ‘︎ 11
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/grantzke
πŸ“…︎ Dec 30 2018
🚨︎ report
My girlfriend complained about her period.

I told her she was ovary-acting.

πŸ‘︎ 180
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Xx360NOSCOPExX420
πŸ“…︎ Mar 04 2018
🚨︎ report
What is the only element on the periodic table that has a gender?

Helium.

πŸ‘︎ 8
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/hqwdean
πŸ“…︎ Jan 28 2019
🚨︎ report
Period .
πŸ‘︎ 7
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Eorinu
πŸ“…︎ Dec 25 2018
🚨︎ report
I don't want to hear your periodic table jokes.

Barium.

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/tvkyle
πŸ“…︎ Feb 08 2019
🚨︎ report
I was putting off studying the Paleolithic period...

...but I eventually caved.

πŸ‘︎ 9
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/WolfAlpha04
πŸ“…︎ Dec 04 2018
🚨︎ report
Salt
πŸ‘︎ 15
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/sunnyyixuanchen
πŸ“…︎ Jan 15
🚨︎ report
What do you call back pain from being on social media for long periods of time?

Scroll-iosis

πŸ‘︎ 10
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Lost_ina_fantasy
πŸ“…︎ Mar 15 2019
🚨︎ report
Why is a woman"s monthly called a period?

Because colon was already taken.

πŸ‘︎ 11
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/bryanBr
πŸ“…︎ Feb 20 2019
🚨︎ report
Remember those periods of 24 hours that made up weeks

Yah, those were the days

πŸ‘︎ 13
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Feb 12 2019
🚨︎ report
What do you get when you cross a musical period with a U.S. president?

Baroque Obama

πŸ‘︎ 7
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/deathstryk
πŸ“…︎ May 30 2018
🚨︎ report
What do you call a time period when Lamborghini starts to produce electric cars only?

"Silence of the Lambs"

πŸ‘︎ 107
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/OJT6627
πŸ“…︎ Oct 20 2018
🚨︎ report
I wrote a book about my love of punctuation.

The Comma Sutra.

πŸ‘︎ 169
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/noahmancometh
πŸ“…︎ Nov 25 2019
🚨︎ report
It's awkward hearing about your daughter's period problems, so when she came to me with them I told her...

Try using a comma, some times.

πŸ‘︎ 7
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/NamelessNutter
πŸ“…︎ Nov 07 2018
🚨︎ report
[Comment section on a post I made about the Periodic Table Song]
πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/AdamantHoonter
πŸ“…︎ Oct 24 2018
🚨︎ report
What's a freezer's favorite time period?

An ice age!

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/xevetv
πŸ“…︎ Dec 31 2018
🚨︎ report
Now this is trashy. Period.
πŸ‘︎ 6
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/teoped01
πŸ“…︎ Aug 20 2018
🚨︎ report
Girlfriend got me good, period.

Im a photographer and was telling her about an assignment to photograph a woman and her early 20th century car and that the woman would be wearing authentic era clothing for the portrait.

Me: And she'll be wearing period appropriate clothing. Girlfriend: So she'll be wearing sweatpants?

πŸ‘︎ 2k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/thecameraman8078
πŸ“…︎ Dec 09 2014
🚨︎ report
What is an undertale skeleton's favorite period of time?

The Renai-sans

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/thememz27
πŸ“…︎ Feb 07 2019
🚨︎ report
I don't know what it is about the periodic table

But it causes Mendeleev

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/XX_RedSpace_xX
πŸ“…︎ Feb 20 2019
🚨︎ report

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