What did the green grape say to the purple grape?
Breathe, damn it! Breathe!
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︎ Oct 07 2020
Why couldn't the green pepper practice archery?
because It didn't habenero . .
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︎ Aug 31 2020
This is how you make neon geen.
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︎ Nov 26 2020
What's green, fuzzy, has 4 legs, and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you?
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︎ Nov 17 2020
What's green with wheels?
Grass. I lied about the wheels.
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︎ Nov 28 2020
What is green and not very heavy?
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︎ Nov 01 2020
Someone offered me a nice cup of green tea
So naturally I said yes, matcha-bliged
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︎ Nov 05 2020
Why did the Marxist only drink green tea?
Because all proper tea is theft!
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︎ Nov 22 2020
My favorite colors are red, green, and blue.
They are the only colors I see.
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︎ Oct 09 2020
Did you hear about the mischievous green onion that sang hip hop?
He was a real rapscallion.
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︎ Oct 24 2020
Did anyone wake up Green Day?
Hi, I was specifically requested on this day, October 1st, to wake up Green Day. Did anyone wake up Green Day?
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︎ Oct 01 2020
The hardware store just told me they didnβt have any intermediate paint colors between green and violet.
That was out of the blue.
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︎ Oct 25 2020
Why did the Green Giant lay down in the field?
So he could Rest in Peas.
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︎ Oct 18 2020
Introducing the new rhyme speaking Green Onion with the super tight back beat! Please welcome the one! The only---
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︎ Sep 26 2020
What's green and pecks on trees?
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︎ Oct 30 2020
Whatβs green and doesnβt weigh much?
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︎ Jun 14 2020
Since this is a βNanaβ tree (common name for Juniperus Procumens Green Mountain Juniper bonsai), it was suggested I have a βbaβ. Therefore, since the stock ticker for Boeing is BA, I bought a toy 787. That means there is now a βbananaβ on the counter.
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︎ Jul 30 2020
Why can't blind people eat ocean fish?
Because it's see-food!
my 11 year old daughter ran in here while cooking greens and dropped that knowledge on us. I couldn't be more proud lol.
edit: just wanted to let those of you who have is awards that I appreciate it! I told my daughter about them and she asked if she can keep telling jokes for me to put on here lol. should get fairly interesting.
thanks all. I hope you had a great turkey gobble day
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︎ Nov 27 2020
Action figures without the Little Green Army Man footplate:
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︎ Aug 30 2020
This makes me want to get a green thumb
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︎ Jun 24 2020
Whatβs green and mean and stabs you when you hug It
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︎ Aug 21 2020
Damn we just missed the green light, this is gonna be heavy!
Because it will be a Full Wait
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︎ Jul 21 2020
I don't have a green thumb...
Both of mine are pinkish.
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︎ May 28 2020
What did the green grape say to the purple grape?
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︎ Nov 19 2020
What did the green grape say to the purple grape?
BREATHE, YOU IDIOT!! BREATHE!!!!
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︎ Nov 28 2020
What's green and fuzzy and if it falls out of a tree on you, it will kill you?
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︎ Sep 22 2020
Whats green has 6 legs and if it fell out of a tree on top of you it would kill you.
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︎ Oct 06 2020
Why couldn't the green pepper practice archery
Because it didn't habanero
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︎ Oct 03 2020
What did the green grape say to the purple grape?
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︎ Oct 04 2020
What did the green grape say to the purple grape
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︎ Apr 08 2020
Whatβs big, green, fuzzy, has four legs, and will kill you if it falls on you out of a tree?
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︎ Jul 22 2020
Why couldn't the Green Pepper practice Archery?
because it didn't habanero
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︎ Sep 09 2020
Why didn't the green pepper practice archery?
Because it didn't habanero.
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︎ Aug 25 2020
Whatβs green, fuzzy, and would kill you if it fell out of a tree on to your head?
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︎ Sep 04 2020
Why didn't the green pepper practice archery?
Because it didn't habanero.
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︎ Aug 24 2020
Why couldn't the green pepper practice archery?
. . . because it didn't habanero!
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︎ Sep 04 2020
What did the green grape say to the purple grape?
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︎ Aug 01 2020
Whatβs green and fuzzy and will kill you if it fell out of a tree
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︎ May 28 2020
What's green and fuzzy and will kill you if it fell out of a tree ?
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︎ Jun 18 2020
What did the Green grape say to the Purple grape?
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︎ Jul 28 2020
Whatβs green, has four legs, and is deadly when it jumps on you?
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︎ Feb 18 2020
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