She got up, unplugged my laptop and threw out my beer….
EDIT: Thanks for the kind awards... My first ever! ❤️
I’m hoping to get a stimulus Czech.
Cannelloni
That will give you a reason to get out of bed in the morning.
It’s really hard to differentiate between them.
Which to be honest I think is a pretty mean way to refer to our city council, however dull they may be.
....Or do they take a while to develop ?
I've actually become quite inn-dependent.
They're shellfish.
Move it too far forward and it becomes a birdie tee.
Too far back and it becomes a bogey tee
Get it just right?
Now that's a party.
Because you can always count on them
Caveman 2: "That depends on how fast you carry the club."
(Yes, I'm aware of the anachronisms.)
What country you end up in depends on the Angola approach
In a dad-a--base
He died in the war, holding a hand grenade.
They always vote "Neigh".
I replied, "Depends."
It depends upon the liver.
Not having much knowledge of the animals, he asks the owner to show him around and tell him about different breeds. "Sure, let's go," says the owner, and brings him over to the paddocks.
"So a lot depends on what you want the animal for," he says, and gestures to a powerful stallion running laps. "Over there, you've got your Type A horse: strong, fast, and a little unpredictable, but great if you want to get somewhere in a hurry."
"I think that'd be a little much for me," the man says, and the owner nods, then brings him over to see a mare quietly chomping at some hay in the shade. "This is a Type B horse - tends to be quiet and they're good companions, but not much for doing work."
The man pauses to think about what he wants the animal for, then looks over at a nearby pond and sees a horse swimming and diving over and over again. "What the heck is that one doing?" he asks the owner. "Oh, him? That's a C horse."
The need-le.
My mam saw a channel on the telly called the Deja Vu channel so she asked my dad what it was.
He replied with ‘I’m not sure but I swear I’ve seen it before’
He’s now pissing himself laughing and mam doesn’t get it
It's all well now.
You boil the hell out of it.
I say, Damn! Do they make a pad for that? Without a pause, she says: Depends
That's a long time considering they're working around the clock.
I thought that was the whole point of them.
It depends on which direction the wind is blowing.
“He is a dick, Ted.”
Depends
Depends on how long it’s been in school.
Hawai'i - because it's not incontinent /original?
more like en passat
Me: Your mask looks like a diaper
Him: It's very comfortable though.
Me: Like Huggies comfortable or Pampers?
Him: It Depends....
I told them It depends on how much work I have pending
Diary-uh or a log. Depends how sappy...
"Several, actually, depending on the day. I'm a kryptonight."
Leather ones, because they’re made of Hide.
