Today I finally told my family about my hot dog addiction

It was really hard but I managed to mustard all the courage to do so

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Rafacu_el_dino
πŸ“…︎ Dec 22 2020
🚨︎ report
Some people have an addiction to alcohol, some to drugs.

Mine was to sandpaper. It was wearing me down.

πŸ‘︎ 15
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πŸ‘€︎ u/VERBERD
πŸ“…︎ Dec 15 2020
🚨︎ report
I’ve suffered from addiction for many years

Since I can remember I’ve been addicted to the hokey pokey, but yesterday I finally turned myself around

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Tommy_like_wingie
πŸ“…︎ Jan 13 2021
🚨︎ report
Why do so many people break off addictions the day after Thanksgiving?

There's a lot of cold turkey to go around.

πŸ‘︎ 13
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ToastGhost18
πŸ“…︎ Dec 27 2020
🚨︎ report
My addiction to refrigerated poultry has gone too far

I'm quitting cold turkey

πŸ‘︎ 599
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Hugh_McMan
πŸ“…︎ Aug 21 2020
🚨︎ report
I overcame my addiction to eating Thanksgiving leftovers directly out of the fridge.

I didn't use the 12 steps, I quit cold turkey.

πŸ‘︎ 13
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πŸ‘€︎ u/spitmonkeyx
πŸ“…︎ Nov 28 2020
🚨︎ report
Textbook addiction

is a really expensive habit to support

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/al666in
πŸ“…︎ Nov 26 2020
🚨︎ report
I had this really terrible addiction to soap.

I'm clean now though..

πŸ‘︎ 34
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Uglyduckling75
πŸ“…︎ Nov 12 2020
🚨︎ report
My wife is fed up of my constant Dad jokes, so I asked her, "How can I stop my addiction?"

Wife: "Whatever means necessary,"

Me: "No it doesn't”

πŸ‘︎ 13k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/dandan_56
πŸ“…︎ Mar 30 2020
🚨︎ report
I have a masturbation addiction....

But I'm beating it

πŸ‘︎ 32
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πŸ‘€︎ u/_joshi_
πŸ“…︎ Sep 05 2020
🚨︎ report
I have an addiction to reading pop-up books, so I went to the library the other day to pick up some proper grown up books to look at. I have to admit there was some good stuff there, ...

... but unfortunately nothing that jumped out at me.

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/klwill1192
πŸ“…︎ Oct 24 2020
🚨︎ report
My wife gave me an ultimatum. It was either her or my addiction to sweets.

The decision was a piece of cake.

πŸ‘︎ 8k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/HellsJuggernaut
πŸ“…︎ Jan 30 2020
🚨︎ report
My girlfriend left me because of my gambling addiction. She claimed I was an idiot.

She's no better.

πŸ‘︎ 11
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πŸ‘€︎ u/TommehBoi
πŸ“…︎ Jul 18 2020
🚨︎ report
I suspect my friend has an unhealthy addiction to knitting quilts.

I have seen all the patterns.

πŸ‘︎ 47
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πŸ‘€︎ u/FinalCaveat
πŸ“…︎ Jul 13 2020
🚨︎ report
Her: I think we need to break up. I’m sick of your addiction to Burger King.

Me: Fine. Have it your way.

πŸ‘︎ 189
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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Feb 27 2020
🚨︎ report
I think I have an abnormal addiction to ducks...

My wife says I'm a quack head

*My son, a dad of a 3yr old, made this up when I told him a dad joke from this sub. He has achieved full dadness

Edit: typo

πŸ‘︎ 22
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πŸ‘€︎ u/traceywashere
πŸ“…︎ Jun 13 2020
🚨︎ report
I thought I overcame my Whitesnake addiction...

but here I go again.

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/vbguy77
πŸ“…︎ May 01 2020
🚨︎ report
I sold all my body parts to feed my gambling addiction.

Maybe I should quit while I’m a head.

πŸ‘︎ 12
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Rav4xle
πŸ“…︎ Jun 07 2020
🚨︎ report
What do you call the toilet of a king with a gambling addiction?

Royal flush!

πŸ‘︎ 28
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πŸ‘€︎ u/MrBirb_
πŸ“…︎ Mar 17 2020
🚨︎ report
My struggle my steroid addiction,

Has only made me stronger.

πŸ‘︎ 17
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πŸ‘€︎ u/shareinagroove
πŸ“…︎ May 19 2020
🚨︎ report
My son just told me he has a heroin addiction.

Needles to say, I'm very disappointed.

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Spongelli_Bobelli
πŸ“…︎ Jun 02 2020
🚨︎ report
I once had an addiction to masturbation...

But I finally beat it.

πŸ‘︎ 19
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πŸ‘€︎ u/yikesomalley
πŸ“…︎ Feb 21 2020
🚨︎ report
My cocaine addiction is getting out of hand

It's time to draw the line.

πŸ‘︎ 82
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πŸ‘€︎ u/otoglomba
πŸ“…︎ Dec 26 2019
🚨︎ report
My addiction to Helium is out of control, but...

No one is taking my cries for help seriously.

πŸ‘︎ 1k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/TheBigSubpoena
πŸ“…︎ May 22 2019
🚨︎ report
My wife told me I had to pick between her and my sugar addiction.

I looked over, sadly, and said β€œGoodbye honey.”

πŸ‘︎ 14
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πŸ‘€︎ u/PuhLeazeOfficer
πŸ“…︎ Feb 13 2020
🚨︎ report
I have an addiction to unpowered flight puns, but I don't like to talk about it.

It's a soar subject.

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/SayLittleDoMuch
πŸ“…︎ Feb 04 2020
🚨︎ report
Why do nuns have problems with addictions?

They have a hard time kicking the habit.

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/unclematthegreat
πŸ“…︎ Dec 28 2019
🚨︎ report
Why did I fail my class? I may a pun addiction
πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/tnrstalker
πŸ“…︎ Dec 14 2019
🚨︎ report
My boyfriend is getting tired of my constant wordplay jokes, so I asked him how I could stop my addiction.

He said "Whatever means necessary." I answered "No it doesn't."

πŸ‘︎ 2k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/municipalplant
πŸ“…︎ Aug 30 2018
🚨︎ report
After 15 years I thought I was finally over my addiction of performing stunts from old western movies

But today I've fallen off the wagon.

πŸ‘︎ 14
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πŸ“…︎ Nov 12 2019
🚨︎ report
I had to stop my clock-eating addiction

It was pretty time consuming

πŸ‘︎ 26
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πŸ‘€︎ u/MrSlothKing
πŸ“…︎ Aug 11 2019
🚨︎ report
I used to be obsessed with the idea of playing football with random items of clothing. However, after stealing from a nun's wardrobe to feed my addiction, I soon saw the error of my ways.

It was a difficult habit to kick.

πŸ‘︎ 30
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πŸ‘€︎ u/T-posing_Jesus
πŸ“…︎ Nov 05 2019
🚨︎ report
I've recently developed an addiction to using lifts

I'm taking steps to get over it.

πŸ‘︎ 10
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Lenzar86
πŸ“…︎ Jan 10 2020
🚨︎ report
My wife and I have decided never to talk again about my addiction to aviation puns.

It’s a soar subject.

πŸ‘︎ 60
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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ May 27 2019
🚨︎ report
Our whole family is really worried about grandpa's viagra addiction...

Grandma is taking it particularly hard...

πŸ‘︎ 68
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πŸ‘€︎ u/JaymantheLegend
πŸ“…︎ Jun 01 2019
🚨︎ report
Addictions are tough to overcome...
πŸ‘︎ 33
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πŸ‘€︎ u/TheMajicman
πŸ“…︎ Aug 08 2018
🚨︎ report
My therapist just told me that my exhibitionism addiction is incurable.

I’ll show her.

πŸ‘︎ 48
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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Aug 19 2019
🚨︎ report
My doctor tells me I've got a bacon addiction.

Thankfully he thinks I can be cured.

πŸ‘︎ 33
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πŸ‘€︎ u/December_Soul
πŸ“…︎ Apr 27 2019
🚨︎ report
My friend has an addiction to flour and is in recovery. To test him, I brought him to a Panera company...

I was wrong in thinking he was clean and no longer would knead it.

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Nov 08 2019
🚨︎ report
I have an addiction to cheddar cheese.

Don't worry, it's only mild.

πŸ‘︎ 22
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Squidis1
πŸ“…︎ Jun 12 2019
🚨︎ report
Did you hear about the guy who went to rehab for his braille addiction?

Now he doesn’t touch the stuff.

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/rhodeslady
πŸ“…︎ Jun 17 2019
🚨︎ report
I had a serious addiction to club sandwhiches, but i quit cold turkey. Now I only eat BLT's.

:D

πŸ‘︎ 16
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πŸ‘€︎ u/butiaintwrong
πŸ“…︎ Jan 29 2019
🚨︎ report
I used to have a severe addiction to soap

I'm clean now

πŸ‘︎ 24
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Brosthetic
πŸ“…︎ Aug 22 2020
🚨︎ report
I used to have an addiction to the hokey pokey

Thankfully, I turned myself around

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Jaxerfp
πŸ“…︎ Aug 21 2020
🚨︎ report
My friend finally overcame his addiction to Thanksgiving leftovers.

He quit cold turkey.

πŸ‘︎ 17
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πŸ‘€︎ u/SenorMeeseeks27
πŸ“…︎ Jun 01 2020
🚨︎ report
I bet you that I can quit my gambling addiction!
πŸ‘︎ 45
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ExpertAccident
πŸ“…︎ Oct 02 2019
🚨︎ report
I had a bad addiction to the hokey pokey..

But I turned myself around.

πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/GrantMC80
πŸ“…︎ Aug 08 2019
🚨︎ report

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