A man bursts into his therapist's office and yells, "Doc, you gotta help me! I keep dreaming that I'm stuck inside a deck of cards!"
The therapist looks up from his paperwork, looks at the man, and says, "I'm busy at the moment, so I'll deal with you later."
The only deck of cards we have at home have all the aces missing...
I don't know how to deal with this.
My friend couldn't figure out why he kept getting wet on his deck when it rained. Turns out he wasn't standing under the awning.
I own a XXL deck of cards
I'm a big deal around here.
Three men were onboard a ship playing dice on deck when the oldest man angrily jumped off the front of the boat. The younger man said..
You keeled my father. Prepare two die.
*I sent this to my brother and he replies: Was his name Inyougo?
^(What a freaking professional)
The only gift I got for Christmas was a deck of sticky playing cards.
I’m having a hard time dealing with this.
My dog pooped on the deck yesterday and now it's all hard.
Which card in a deck can fix your dog?
How does a deck of cards get around?
It shuffles.
(a true dad joke, from my 9-year old)
Anyone I ever dated was impressed when I told them I liked to relax on my poop deck.
They were always disappointed when I showed them it was just a regular deck with dog poop on it.
I got locked in a room with a deck of cards.
I was in solitaire confinement.
Reposting a deck.
https://preview.redd.it/6fjp1ey3av951.jpg?width=4032&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=5f316e956e212e100c3fe44cbaef56333f1c2c9a
I woke up on an island, just me and a deck of cards.
So far, I’m not a big fan of solitairy confinement
I was sitting on the deck with my son. My neighbor walked by and asked “Are you babysitting?”
I said “No, I’m dad sitting.”
My wife is teaching my little ones (3/1) about bugs so they wrote “Ant” in honey on a piece of paper to attract them and set it out on the deck. She was sad When we went out to check later that day, only one was there.
You should have pluralized it and more would have shown up!
What do you call someone who commits a murder with a deck of cards that only has clubs, spades, and diamonds?
Me : "Doctor Doctor, I feel like a deck of cards"
Doctor : "Sit down, I'll deal with you later"
Marriage is like a deck of cards
It starts with Hearts and Diamonds and ends with a Club and a Spade
I called the casino to ask why the used card decks I ordered were still undelivered.
They assured me they were dealing with it.
I once played poker with a deck of tarot cards.
I got a full house and 3 people died.
A patient bursts into a doctor’s office, "Doctor, I believe I'm a deck of cards!" The doctor calmly replies, "Go sit in the waiting room, please, I'll be dealing with you later."
short-funny.com/best-puns…
A young-looking sea captain comes on deck to greet his crew for the first time and one man blurted out by accident, "He's a baby!"
The captain responded, "No shit, I used to be a seaman."
I told the doctor I felt like a deck of playing cards...
He said he’d deal with me later.
My teenage son got a tattoo of a deck of cards without our permission.
I might have to deal with him later.
Can you cut the deck for me?
Why did the deck blush?
Because it was caught watching paint stripping.
Marriage is like a deck of cards...
All you need to start of is two hearts and a diamond but come the end you'll wish you had a club and a spade.
I was stuck on a boat with no food in the middle of the ocean with just a deck of cards.
A card game was going on until one man was caught stealing from the deck
Furious, they would have hit him with a club if they had one
My son was complaining that his older brother threw a deck of cards at him.
I said, “Why don’t you deal with it?”
I saw them remove the upper deck from a baseball park the other day...
All I got for my birthday was a deck of sticky playing cards.
I’m having a hard time dealing with this.
The only gift I got for my birthday was a deck of sticky playing cards.
I’m finding it hard to deal with this.
A man bursts into his therapist's office and says, "Doc, you gotta help me. I keep dreaming I'm stuck inside a deck of cards!"
The therapist looked up from his paperwork and said, "I'm busy now. I'll deal with you later."
A patient bursts into his therapist's office and shouts, "Doc, you gotta help me. I keep dreaming that I'm trapped in a deck of cards!"
The therapist turns from his current patient and says, "I'm busy now. I'll deal with you later."
A therapist was with a client when another client burst in and said, "Doc, you gotta help me! I keep having a nightmare that I'm stuck inside a deck of cards."
The therapist looked at him calmly and said, "I'm with another client. I'll deal with you later."
The only gift I got for my birthday was a deck of sticky playing cards.
I find it extremely difficult to deal with.
I got locked in a room with nothing but a deck of cards.
I was in solitaire confinement.
The only gift I got for my birthday is a deck of sticky playing cards.
I find that very hard to deal with.
The only birthday gift I got this year was a deck of sticky playing cards.
I find that very hard to deal with.
The only gift I got for my birthday was a deck of sticky playing cards.
I’m having a hard time dealing with it.
I accidentally locked myself in a room with nothing but a deck of cards..
I was in solitaire confinement.
For my birthday, all I got was a deck of sticky playing cards.
I find that very difficult to deal with.
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