The only deck of cards we have at home have all the aces missing...

I don't know how to deal with this.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 4
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/VERBERD
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jun 02 2021
🚨︎ report
A man bursts into his therapist's office and yells, "Doc, you gotta help me! I keep dreaming that I'm stuck inside a deck of cards!"

The therapist looks up from his paperwork, looks at the man, and says, "I'm busy at the moment, so I'll deal with you later."

πŸ‘οΈŽ 112
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/jfshay
πŸ“…οΈŽ Apr 16 2021
🚨︎ report
I own a XXL deck of cards

I'm a big deal around here.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 6
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Aggressive_Pear
πŸ“…οΈŽ Apr 17 2021
🚨︎ report
The only gift I got for Christmas was a deck of sticky playing cards.

I’m having a hard time dealing with this.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 86
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…οΈŽ Dec 28 2020
🚨︎ report
How does a deck of cards get around?

It shuffles.

(a true dad joke, from my 9-year old)

πŸ‘οΈŽ 14
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/asiers
πŸ“…οΈŽ Oct 01 2020
🚨︎ report
I got locked in a room with a deck of cards.

I was in solitaire confinement.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 8
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/FinalCaveat
πŸ“…οΈŽ Sep 10 2020
🚨︎ report
I woke up on an island, just me and a deck of cards.

So far, I’m not a big fan of solitairy confinement

πŸ‘οΈŽ 3
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/daddyflextape
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jul 07 2020
🚨︎ report
What do you call someone who commits a murder with a deck of cards that only has clubs, spades, and diamonds?

Heartless

πŸ‘οΈŽ 2
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/lego_luke
πŸ“…οΈŽ May 22 2020
🚨︎ report
Me : "Doctor Doctor, I feel like a deck of cards"

Doctor : "Sit down, I'll deal with you later"

πŸ‘οΈŽ 21
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/HellsJuggernaut
πŸ“…οΈŽ Feb 04 2020
🚨︎ report
Marriage is like a deck of cards

It starts with Hearts and Diamonds and ends with a Club and a Spade

πŸ‘οΈŽ 5
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/HellsJuggernaut
πŸ“…οΈŽ Feb 19 2020
🚨︎ report
I once played poker with a deck of tarot cards.

I got a full house and 3 people died.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 73
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/RichNCrispy
πŸ“…οΈŽ Feb 08 2019
🚨︎ report
A patient bursts into a doctor’s office, "Doctor, I believe I'm a deck of cards!" The doctor calmly replies, "Go sit in the waiting room, please, I'll be dealing with you later." short-funny.com/best-puns…
πŸ‘οΈŽ 15
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/moses10960
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jul 10 2017
🚨︎ report
My teenage son got a tattoo of a deck of cards without our permission.

I might have to deal with him later.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 42
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…οΈŽ Aug 31 2018
🚨︎ report
I told the doctor I felt like a deck of playing cards...

He said he’d deal with me later.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 19
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/DinglebarryHandpump
πŸ“…οΈŽ Sep 20 2018
🚨︎ report
Marriage is like a deck of cards...

All you need to start of is two hearts and a diamond but come the end you'll wish you had a club and a spade.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 42
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/dacs1306
πŸ“…οΈŽ Sep 10 2018
🚨︎ report
I was stuck on a boat with no food in the middle of the ocean with just a deck of cards.

Luckily I could go fish.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 9
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/F1NANCE
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 08 2019
🚨︎ report
My son was complaining that his older brother threw a deck of cards at him.

I said, β€œWhy don’t you deal with it?”

πŸ‘οΈŽ 22
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…οΈŽ Oct 02 2018
🚨︎ report
PUN INTENDED : A deck of 54 pun based critter cards. dailycrittercards.com
πŸ‘οΈŽ 27
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/albertog72
πŸ“…οΈŽ Dec 17 2014
🚨︎ report
I played euchre with a large deck of cards....

It was kind of a big deal

πŸ‘οΈŽ 5
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Bombastic_cube
πŸ“…οΈŽ Dec 29 2015
🚨︎ report
What do you call a deck of cards with nothing to do?

Cardbored

πŸ‘οΈŽ 6
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Xenoraiser
πŸ“…οΈŽ Sep 16 2016
🚨︎ report
The most puny and beautiful deck of playing cards ever made. kickstarter.com/projects/…
πŸ‘οΈŽ 9
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/albertog72
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 04 2015
🚨︎ report
All I got for my birthday was a deck of sticky playing cards.

I’m having a hard time dealing with this.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 19
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…οΈŽ Dec 11 2020
🚨︎ report
The only gift I got for my birthday was a deck of sticky playing cards.

I’m finding it hard to deal with this.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 155
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…οΈŽ Aug 31 2020
🚨︎ report
A man bursts into his therapist's office and says, "Doc, you gotta help me. I keep dreaming I'm stuck inside a deck of cards!"

The therapist looked up from his paperwork and said, "I'm busy now. I'll deal with you later."

πŸ‘οΈŽ 9
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/jfshay
πŸ“…οΈŽ Nov 17 2020
🚨︎ report
A patient bursts into his therapist's office and shouts, "Doc, you gotta help me. I keep dreaming that I'm trapped in a deck of cards!"

The therapist turns from his current patient and says, "I'm busy now. I'll deal with you later."

πŸ‘οΈŽ 75
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/jfshay
πŸ“…οΈŽ Mar 09 2020
🚨︎ report
A therapist was with a client when another client burst in and said, "Doc, you gotta help me! I keep having a nightmare that I'm stuck inside a deck of cards."

The therapist looked at him calmly and said, "I'm with another client. I'll deal with you later."

πŸ‘οΈŽ 5
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/jfshay
πŸ“…οΈŽ Sep 04 2020
🚨︎ report
The only gift I got for my birthday was a deck of sticky playing cards.

I find it extremely difficult to deal with.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 5
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…οΈŽ May 12 2020
🚨︎ report
I got locked in a room with nothing but a deck of cards.

I was in solitaire confinement.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 71
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/FinalCaveat
πŸ“…οΈŽ Sep 28 2019
🚨︎ report
The only gift I got for my birthday is a deck of sticky playing cards.

I find that very hard to deal with.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 84
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…οΈŽ Aug 25 2019
🚨︎ report
The only birthday gift I got this year was a deck of sticky playing cards.

I find that very hard to deal with.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 560
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…οΈŽ May 19 2018
🚨︎ report
The only gift I got for my birthday was a deck of sticky playing cards.

I’m having a hard time dealing with it.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 7
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…οΈŽ Oct 29 2019
🚨︎ report
I accidentally locked myself in a room with nothing but a deck of cards..

I was in solitaire confinement.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 78
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/WhereBeThemPieRates
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 07 2019
🚨︎ report
For my birthday, all I got was a deck of sticky playing cards.

I find that very difficult to deal with.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 63
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…οΈŽ Apr 24 2019
🚨︎ report
For my birthday, i got gifted a sticky deck of cards

I find it very hard to deal with

πŸ‘οΈŽ 48
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/peanut31
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jul 02 2018
🚨︎ report

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.