What is the medical diagnosis for owning too many dogs?

Roverdose

πŸ‘︎ 5k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/jelly_frijole
πŸ“…︎ Feb 10 2019
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John started working in a color pigment company...

John started working in a color pigment company which specialises in mixing and editing different color pigments according to their customers's demands. Once the color pigments were done, they would be mailed out to the customers with a detailed note commenting on the properties of the produced color pigments. John was placed in the 'Pink Pigment' department which was incidentally between the 'Red Pigment' and 'White Pigment' departments. He was really good at his job and was constantly praised for the great work he produced.

However after a month or so, John found that a number of his work was being duplicated and mailed to almost all of his customers. Worse of all, instead of a proper note commenting on the color pigment properties, these duplicated products were accompanied with rather bad puns and jokes. One repeating joke which irritated him the most was: 'What do you call a country with only pink cars? A pink car-nation.'

Upset, he went to his manager to complain about the problem. After listening to John, his manager said, "Oh boy, looks like I need to talk to the manager of the 'Red Pigment' department again. This is not the first time that it has happened. Those Red-editors in that department love to copy and repost other people's original work as their own."
John then asked, "How are you so sure that it was them who are responsible?"
His manager replied, "Well, you can be certain that it is them as they always love jokes or puns especially in the comment section."

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/AesSedai99
πŸ“…︎ May 22 2018
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A proud moment

A proud new dad sits down to have a drink with his father

"Well son, now that you've got a kid of your own, I think it's time to give you this"

"Dad, you don't mean-"

"Yes son, I do" Dad pulls out copy of 1001 Dad Jokes, 5th Edition

"Dad... I'm honoured...", he says, tears sparkling in his eyes.

"Hi honoured", replies his father. "I'm dad".

πŸ‘︎ 62
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πŸ‘€︎ u/sl101m
πŸ“…︎ Mar 18 2018
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Whale watching...

So mom and dad have my wife and my kid along with my sister's kid out whale watching and sent us a photo of orcas they saw. This followed...

Me: killer view!
Siss: killer view!
Me: are you thinking the same as me OR CAn you not think of anything unique and are copying me on porpoise
Me: I mean I’m having a whale of a time
Me: Did you FINish?
Me: Does your boat have a motor anD/OR SAIL?
Mom (probably dad's joke tho): You are on a roll
Me: Not sure I have many lines left actually
Me: Actually I’m beginning to waver on that statement
Me: Though it seems siss has bowed out of the conversation.
Me: Maybe she’ll come up with something after I’m done
Me: have you guys SEAn (sic) anything other than orcas?
Mom: Humpback
Me: good day for that!
Wife: Very cool!
Me: Definitely looks chilly
Wife: 20 texts... Wow
Me: Definitely an imPORTant thread to watch
Me: like how i cap-size my text to make the joke obvious?
Me: siss’ silence is fishy tho
Mom: You definitely LANDed them
Me: They just come to me and I let em sail
Me: To admit some are a bit ridockulous
Me: Which can make them tough to catch
Me: but I’ll keep tossing them out there anyway for the few that land
Me: I think we lost the point of the conversation though
Me: Let's coral it back
Me: I'm being far too shellfish by uslurping it like this
Me: But Siss did have the gull to keep repeating me
Me: Buoy that one was bad

edit: formatting

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/gabeanzelini
πŸ“…︎ Sep 02 2015
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New father

A proud new father sits down with his dad to have a drink.

"Well son, now that you have a son of your own its time I gave you something."

"Dad you dont mea-"

"Yes I do. You've earned it." Says the father as he passes a copy of '1001 Dad Jokes 5th Edition' to the son.

"Dad I dont know what to say...I'm honored."

"Hi honored," Replies the father. "I'm dad."

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/SavageTimmy
πŸ“…︎ Dec 15 2017
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'1001 Dad Jokes 5th Edition'

A proud new father sits down with his dad to have a drink.

"Well son, now that you have a son of your own its time I gave you something."

"Dad you dont mea-"

"Yes I do. You've earned it." Says the father as he passes a copy of '1001 Dad Jokes 5th Edition' to the son.

"Dad I dont know what to say...I'm honored."

"Hi honored," Replies the father. "I'm dad."

πŸ‘︎ 10
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Verapamil123
πŸ“…︎ Oct 19 2014
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A proud new dad sits down to have a drink with his father...

A proud new dad sits down to have a drink with his father

"Well son, now that you’ve got a kid of your own, I think it’s time to give you this"

"Dad, you don’t mean-"

"Yes son, I do" Dad pulls out copy of 1001 Dad Jokes, 5th Edition "Dad… I’m honoured…", he says, tears sparkling in his eyes.

"Hi honoured", replies his father. "I’m dad".

πŸ‘︎ 13
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πŸ‘€︎ u/mikeyt493
πŸ“…︎ Nov 26 2013
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