Busted a nut...
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ZaKrypton
πŸ“…︎ Nov 01 2020
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You hear about the cop who got busted for driving while intoxicated?

He thought he was supposed to protect and swerve.

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Entree_The_Giant
πŸ“…︎ Sep 20 2020
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A group of leprechauns was recently busted for selling fake granite

Yeah, they were sham rocks.

πŸ‘︎ 48
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πŸ‘€︎ u/zamoose
πŸ“…︎ Jul 17 2020
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Why was the school teacher busted?

He was trying to do some meth

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/crazyjarvis
πŸ“…︎ May 15 2020
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Most busted videos are training videos.

Because most people are told to fall back on their training.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/jlionbad
πŸ“…︎ May 23 2020
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A funeral home got busted for raffling dead bodies off to med schools.

Police said it was a dead giveaway.

πŸ‘︎ 21
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πŸ‘€︎ u/NikkoE82
πŸ“…︎ Feb 27 2020
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I busted my guitar up but I’ll give it to you for free.

Really. No strings attached.

πŸ‘︎ 11
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Texas_OT
πŸ“…︎ Jan 08 2020
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My dad recently started his job at the sewage plant, and already busted a pipe and caused a flood.

His boss found out, and now he’s in deep shit.

πŸ‘︎ 24
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Xianthamist
πŸ“…︎ Jan 07 2020
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I busted out MS Paint today
πŸ‘︎ 744
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πŸ‘€︎ u/mike_pants
πŸ“…︎ Apr 20 2018
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Just busted a nut
πŸ‘︎ 15
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πŸ‘€︎ u/paper-machete56
πŸ“…︎ Jan 23 2019
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Got busted almost bumping into windows on the way to work today
πŸ‘︎ 10
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πŸ‘€︎ u/jorubhi
πŸ“…︎ Apr 23 2019
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Those criminals 'bout to be BUSted
πŸ‘︎ 369
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ash92596
πŸ“…︎ Jul 28 2017
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Busted
πŸ‘︎ 13
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πŸ‘€︎ u/thecasualcaribou
πŸ“…︎ Jan 25 2019
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Busted.
πŸ‘︎ 870
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πŸ‘€︎ u/sabrinalynn1983
πŸ“…︎ Oct 21 2017
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Busted out this gem after only three weeks of being a dad

I picked up my daughter after being outside in the cold and she started squirming from the touch of my ice cold hands. My wife asked for her back and I said "not unless you pry her from my cold dad hands"

πŸ‘︎ 2k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/hubetronic
πŸ“…︎ Dec 30 2014
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I accidentally busted my headlight last night.

It wasn't my brightest moment.

πŸ‘︎ 24
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πŸ‘€︎ u/jar_of_salt
πŸ“…︎ Nov 22 2018
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I got busted stealing calcium, alkaline, and sodium.

I didn't get charged with robbery. I got charged with assault and battery.

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/eleece
πŸ“…︎ Feb 16 2019
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Police have busted the PGA tour golf club syndicate...

They have recovered a set of stolen golf clubs and arrested one man. But they are still looking for the driver.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Nov 10 2018
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Busted
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Chrenen
πŸ“…︎ Oct 04 2017
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Busted out a dad joke the other day

The other night at the dinner table my wife was giving some advice to my son. He is too young to really understand, but sometimes we'll give him advice anyway, and it usually reflects something we wish we could do over again in our own lives.

My wife: "Son, make sure to study abroad in college if you get the chance."

Me: "Make sure to study a few, if you can."

πŸ‘︎ 262
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πŸ‘€︎ u/mctoasterson
πŸ“…︎ Oct 03 2013
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My dad just told me "Save all of your busted lightbulbs, I'm going to built a dark room."
πŸ‘︎ 10
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πŸ‘€︎ u/NextGenBacon
πŸ“…︎ Jul 23 2017
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I beat on my keyboard today and busted the ESC key...

now ther is NO ESCAPE.

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Ninja9002
πŸ“…︎ Feb 20 2015
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Area man busted for counterfeiting money...

The police found him in his apartmint.

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πŸ“…︎ Jan 27 2015
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I got busted by my 5 year old daughter.

I got home from work yesterday, and the first thing my daughter was was "Daddy, I made brownies!"

"Wow, I said, can eat one?"

She pulled out a plate filled with the letter 'E's made out of brown construction paper. (brown E's).

"You can if you want to, but I don't think you'll like the taste!"

πŸ‘︎ 55
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πŸ‘€︎ u/N8theGr8
πŸ“…︎ Mar 27 2014
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Saw a busted ladder on the freeway...

"Guess it's not part of the 12-step program anymore. It really fell off the wagon."

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πŸ‘€︎ u/dangerbiscuits
πŸ“…︎ Sep 10 2016
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My grandad just busted this one out...

Mammoth, do you know what a shitsu is?

A breed of dog?

No, a zoo with no animals.

uuuuuuuurghhhhh.

πŸ‘︎ 66
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πŸ‘€︎ u/MrRagingMammoth
πŸ“…︎ Oct 29 2013
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My dad busted out this one while I was getting ready for work.

I was putting a nice, businessy-looking side part in my hair, when my dad said: "Ugh! Who parted?"

He then chuckled until after I was out the door.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Valiant4Funk
πŸ“…︎ Feb 28 2014
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My Boss just busted out this groaner. He sends me the picture and asks "What do you call this radiant?" (pic in comments)

http://i.imgur.com/Bum1Jzn.jpg "Black to the Fuschia". Ugh.

πŸ‘︎ 30
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πŸ‘€︎ u/SpicyTangyRage
πŸ“…︎ Dec 04 2014
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No one appreciated this one I busted out at the zoo this weekend.

We're standing at the meerkat exhibit and I said "Do you know how to call a meerkat?" ..." 'mere, cat!"

It was gloriously terrible.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/SgtMac02
πŸ“…︎ Oct 20 2014
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My fiancΓ© just busted out this gem...

We have a ten week old son and his humor has gotten lamer and lamer by the day. We moved our coffee table out of the way to vacuum and I said, 'It would be really cool to just put a giant love sack there instead of a table' (a love sack is one of those giant bean bag chairs).

He looked at me and without missing a beat belts out 'Cuz a loooove sack, is a little old place where....we can sit to-getherrrrrrr.' Laughs at his own joke... All the way up the stairs.

And it begins.

TL;DR Rock lobster

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πŸ‘€︎ u/kaps84
πŸ“…︎ Sep 22 2013
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Did you hear about the two dads that were busted for fighting over a pin-up calender?

... they each got 6 months.

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/fericyde
πŸ“…︎ Apr 01 2015
🚨︎ report
My colleague busted out some grade A Dad jokes on my JustGiving page. (I am donating my hair to charity)

http://imgur.com/z0TOWbg

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πŸ‘€︎ u/TheCaptainOats
πŸ“…︎ Oct 11 2014
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My brother said he busted his knee skateboarding.

Dad: "That must have hurt wheel bad"

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/caleb5
πŸ“…︎ Feb 20 2014
🚨︎ report
My dad busted this one out last time we were driving together

A random bug splats on the windshield

Dad: "What do you think was the last thing to go through that bugs mind?"

Me: "I don't know... what?"

Dad: "It's ass."

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/flyguy727
πŸ“…︎ Aug 28 2013
🚨︎ report

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