If a male person bursts into laughter...

... can he then be accused of manslaughter?

πŸ‘︎ 28
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Blan_Uator
πŸ“…︎ Jan 07
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A man bursts into his therapist's office and says, "Doc, you gotta help me. I keep dreaming I'm stuck inside a deck of cards!"

The therapist looked up from his paperwork and said, "I'm busy now. I'll deal with you later."

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/jfshay
πŸ“…︎ Nov 17 2020
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Today, my son asked "Can I have a book mark?" and I burst into tears...

11 years old and he still doesn't know my name is Brian.

πŸ‘︎ 4k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/csgo_Kriptonas
πŸ“…︎ Apr 18 2020
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An armed robber bursts into a store one day.

Pointing his firearm at two cashiers, he shouts β€œhand over the contents of the cash register! I need it to set myself up in a trade or profession...you know, a habitual occupation followed for a livelihood and involving commercial transactions!”

Cashier 1: β€œWhat do we do?”

Cashier 2: β€œDo what he says, I think he means business!”

πŸ‘︎ 21
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Titsonafish
πŸ“…︎ Oct 16 2020
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A man burst into a ski resort in Vale, Colorado.

He shouted into the room, "Everywhere I go, there's a black bird that sticks to me. He sticks to my fleece jacket, my wool hat, even my velvet gloves!"

The concierge shakes his head and says, "Oh, that's just the Vale crow."

πŸ‘︎ 32
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πŸ‘€︎ u/bobskimo
πŸ“…︎ Aug 22 2020
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Burst out laughing!
πŸ‘︎ 16
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πŸ‘€︎ u/djadmn
πŸ“…︎ Jun 20 2020
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I burst into the kitchen and shouted at my wife, "Honey! Whatever you do, do NOT let them take your temperature on your forehead when you go into the supermarket!! It erases your memory!! I went in for bread and milk like you asked..."

"...and came out with two cases of beer!!!"

πŸ‘︎ 10
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πŸ‘€︎ u/madazzahatter
πŸ“…︎ Jul 28 2020
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As if 2020 wasn't crazy enough in Texas today, a herd of cows suddenly burst into flames.

Scientists still don't know what the cattle-lyst was.

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/TigerDiesel
πŸ“…︎ Jul 14 2020
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When you’re sliding in to first and you feel your britches burst...

You should have bought a high quality denim jean with plenty of room for your legs. Those tight jeans are just not practical.

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/jvanzandd
πŸ“…︎ Jun 26 2020
🚨︎ report
My dad burst into my room and said, β€œWanna hear a joke?”, and then proceeded to fart for a whole minute.

He said. β€œSorry. That was a long winded story.”

πŸ‘︎ 2k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Jul 03 2019
🚨︎ report
My wife Lorraine left me because I always burst into song.

I can see clearly now Lorraine has gone.

πŸ‘︎ 26
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πŸ‘€︎ u/karma-enigma
πŸ“…︎ Feb 20 2020
🚨︎ report
My inflatable dock burst after my friends kept telling me to fill it with more air.

Too much pier pressure.

πŸ‘︎ 87
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πŸ‘€︎ u/FinalCaveat
πŸ“…︎ Nov 02 2019
🚨︎ report
Be careful to not burst your bubble.
πŸ‘︎ 32
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πŸ‘€︎ u/cardelol
πŸ“…︎ Oct 08 2019
🚨︎ report
Today, my son asked "Can I have a book mark?" and I burst into tears. 11 years old and he still doesn't know my name is Brian. /r/Weekness/comments/erz6…
πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/jpurvisturton
πŸ“…︎ Jan 21 2020
🚨︎ report
A man burst into a doctor's office and began asking all sorts of strange questions to the people waiting inside. When the doctor asked him to stop, he didn't. The doctor replied

You're really testing my patients.

πŸ‘︎ 91
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πŸ‘€︎ u/OrionHunter66
πŸ“…︎ Apr 04 2019
🚨︎ report
A boy was sitting at home playing video games when suddenly his dad bursts in through the front door and says, β€œSon, look, check out my new AirPods!”

The boy looks at his father’s ears but sees nothing. β€œDad, there’s nothing there.”

β€œYeah I know, they’re literal!”

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Majikin__
πŸ“…︎ Mar 06 2019
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A patient bursts into a doctor’s office, "Doctor, I believe I'm a deck of cards!" The doctor calmly replies, "Go sit in the waiting room, please, I'll be dealing with you later." short-funny.com/best-puns…
πŸ‘︎ 15
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πŸ‘€︎ u/moses10960
πŸ“…︎ Jul 10 2017
🚨︎ report
I was walking down the street when a group of kids threw a block of cheese off me, they burst into laughter and I yelled

β€œThat’s not mature is it”

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/GrowerNotAShower2
πŸ“…︎ Mar 04 2019
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Have you heard of the woman who periodically bursts into a pet shop asking if they have big white bears?

She's been diagnosed with buypolar disorder.

πŸ‘︎ 21
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πŸ‘€︎ u/thefizzynator
πŸ“…︎ Mar 26 2016
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My brother's surgeon burst out into song in the ER

He said it was Open Mike night.

πŸ‘︎ 39
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πŸ‘€︎ u/xwhy
πŸ“…︎ May 22 2017
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What do you call a jacket that bursts into flames?

A blazer

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ“…︎ Oct 26 2017
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Today my son asked "can I have a book mark" and I burst in tears

19 years old and he still does not know my name is Luke

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/epicgamerluke
πŸ“…︎ Sep 02 2020
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A therapist was with a client when another client burst in and said, "Doc, you gotta help me! I keep having a nightmare that I'm stuck inside a deck of cards."

The therapist looked at him calmly and said, "I'm with another client. I'll deal with you later."

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/jfshay
πŸ“…︎ Sep 04 2020
🚨︎ report
A patient bursts into his therapist's office and shouts, "Doc, you gotta help me. I keep dreaming that I'm trapped in a deck of cards!"

The therapist turns from his current patient and says, "I'm busy now. I'll deal with you later."

πŸ‘︎ 76
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πŸ‘€︎ u/jfshay
πŸ“…︎ Mar 09 2020
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Today, my son asked "Can I have a book mark?" and I burst into tears. 11 years old and he still doesn't know my name is Brian.
πŸ‘︎ 43k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ebkbk
πŸ“…︎ Nov 24 2018
🚨︎ report
Today my son asked β€œCan I have a book mark?” And I burst into tears. 15 years and he still doesn’t know my names Brian.

[removed]

πŸ‘︎ 24
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πŸ‘€︎ u/KoronaSenpai
πŸ“…︎ Apr 08 2020
🚨︎ report
Today my son asked "can i have a book mark?" I burst into tears.

He is 11 years old and still doesn't know my name is Brian

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Whymustudodat
πŸ“…︎ May 23 2020
🚨︎ report
Today, my son asked "Can i have a book mark?" And i burst into tears

11 years old and he still doesnt know my name is Brian

πŸ‘︎ 18
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πŸ‘€︎ u/RussiaIsMyCity
πŸ“…︎ Apr 12 2020
🚨︎ report
Today, my son asked "Can I have a book mark?" and I burst into tears. 11 years old and he still doesn't know my name is Brian.
πŸ‘︎ 279
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ruchi565
πŸ“…︎ Oct 07 2019
🚨︎ report
Today, my son asked "Can I have a bookmark?" and I burst into tears.

11 years old and he still doesn't know my name is Brian.

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Rav4xle
πŸ“…︎ May 19 2020
🚨︎ report
Today, my son asked "Can I have a book mark?" and I burst into tears

11 years old and he still doesn't know my name is Brian.

πŸ‘︎ 112
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Oct 12 2019
🚨︎ report
Today, my son asked "Can I have a book mark?" and I burst into tears.

11 years old and he still doesn't know my name is Brian.

πŸ‘︎ 33
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πŸ‘€︎ u/MrKrabs7382
πŸ“…︎ Oct 17 2019
🚨︎ report
Today, my son asked "Can I have a book mark?" and I burst into tears.

11 years old and he still doesn't know my name is Brian

πŸ‘︎ 85
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Jun 12 2019
🚨︎ report
Today, my son asked "Can I have a book mark?" and I burst into tears. 11 years old and he still doesn't know my name is Brian.
πŸ‘︎ 36
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πŸ‘€︎ u/JackTMJones
πŸ“…︎ Oct 30 2019
🚨︎ report
Today, my son asked "Can I have a book mark?" and I burst into tears. 11 years old and he still doesn't know my name is Brian.
πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ruchi565
πŸ“…︎ Oct 24 2019
🚨︎ report
Today, my son asked "Can I have a book mark?" and I burst into tears. 11 years old and he still doesn't know my name is Brian.
πŸ‘︎ 21
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ruchi565
πŸ“…︎ Oct 24 2019
🚨︎ report
Today, my son asked "Can I have a book mark?" and I burst into tears. 11 years old and he still doesn't know my name is Brian.

Rip

πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/TiltedDaniel
πŸ“…︎ Nov 07 2019
🚨︎ report
Today, my son asked "can I have a book mark?" And I burst into tears.

11 years old and he still doesn't know my name is Brian!

πŸ‘︎ 25
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πŸ‘€︎ u/MemeMakso
πŸ“…︎ Jun 18 2019
🚨︎ report
Today, my son asked "Can I have a book mark?" and I burst into tears

11 years old and he still doesn't know my name is Brian.

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/mora_kylkee
πŸ“…︎ Jul 27 2019
🚨︎ report
Today, my son asked "Can I have a book mark?" and I burst into tears.

11 years old and he still doesn't know my name is Brian.

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/virulentt_music
πŸ“…︎ Aug 01 2019
🚨︎ report
Today, my son asked "Can I have a book mark?" and I burst into tears. 11 years old and he still doesn't know my name is Brian.
πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/digitalsadia
πŸ“…︎ Jun 20 2019
🚨︎ report
My daughter asked me "do you have a book mark". I burst out crying

Shes 11 years old and still doesn't know that my name is bob...

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/yaboihaan
πŸ“…︎ May 29 2019
🚨︎ report
Today, my son asked me β€œcan I have a book mark?” And I burst out crying, 11 years old and he still won’t call me dad
πŸ‘︎ 16
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πŸ‘€︎ u/WalkingWharf8
πŸ“…︎ Jan 09 2019
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Today, my son asked β€œCan I have a bookmark?”. And he burst into tears, because I threw a book at him.
πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/MildBanana
πŸ“…︎ Jun 28 2019
🚨︎ report
Today, my son asked "Can I have a book mark?" and I burst into tears.

11 years old and he still doesn't know my name is Brian

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/wonderwizard42
πŸ“…︎ Apr 25 2019
🚨︎ report

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