I've started a new band called "Blanket'
Why does your laptop have a blanket on it?
I did because I put it on sleep mode.
Why did the kid wrap all his books in a blanket?
So that he could cover the entire syllabus.
What do you call a blessed blanket?
What did the blanket say when it fell off the bed?
I'm thinking about buying a weighted blanket.
This is a most heavy decision.
Son: Dad, do you have another blanket by you? I’m cold
Dad: Go stand in the corner son, it’s 90° over there
I get a little shady when I'm in blankets.
My wife ordered one of those new heavy blankets off Amazon but delivery took forever...
She says it was worth the weight.
I used to hate the electric blanket
But the last few nights I’ve been warming up to it.
For the last two weeks my kids have been building a medieval blanket fort every evening to sleep in. Many nights they also stayed up past their bedtime playing fortnight under its protective cover.
It was a night knight fort for Fortnight for a fortnight.
What kind of blanket has the most patience?
A man started wearing a blanket to the office
His colleagues began to suspect he was working undercover...
My wife traumatically ripped the blankets off me last night.
I feel a bit bad for making blanket statements.....
They're my quilty pleasure
It was fun being a spy til they put me in a windy city with only a blanket for camouflage
My cover was blown constantly
last night, my wife dramatically ripped the blankets off me
I just saw a homeless man get arrested for cloaking himself in a blanket the cops falsely accused him of stealing...
I put a blanket on a small pepper
He said he felt a little chili
Prosecutor: "In the case of who illegally made a blanket out of patches,
we call the defendant quilty"
Did you hear about the guy who's blanket fell off of him in the hospital?
What did the pillow say when the blanket asked it to come hang out
I woke up in the middle of the night and discovered all my blankets were missing.
"I'm going undercover" is such a blanket statement.
Besides, you should be keeping that under wraps...
My dad just handed me a pig in a blanket Dad: Would you care for one of these
Me: Only if it needed me..
If you say something in bed, is it a blanket statement
TIL Pigs in a blanket was invented in Alabama.
We know this because they are in bread.
Hopefully you all like this better than when I shared on r/jokes.
I only have a few hours to finish weaving this blanket.
Last night my bf asked me to hand him the blankets...
As I pulled the comforter over him I said, "I got you covered."
I proceeded to laugh for 1 solid minute, he did NOT think it was funny.
Mommy, daddy and little lion are having a picnic. As soon as they've taken seat on their blanket, little lion wants to start eating. "Hold on," says daddy lion.
To make a blanket statement about pop music...
To refer to all women as bitches isn't just a blanket statement, it's a broad generalization
What did the Papa Blanket say to the Mama Blanket when the Baby Blanket was crying?
What did the blanket said when it fell of the bed?
What did the blanket say as it fell off the bed?
What did the blanket say when it fell off the bed?
Last night, my girlfriend dramatically ripped the blankets off me...
Don’t worry I’ll recover.
What did the blanket say when it fell off the bed?
I woke up in the middle of the night and freaked out when I noticed all the blankets on my bed were missing.
What did the blanket say when it fell off the bed?
What did the blanket say as it fell off the bed?
What did the blanket say when it fell off the bed?
What did the blanket say when it fell off the bed ?
What did the blanket say when it fell off the bed?
What did the blanket say when it fell off the bed?
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