Ark pun.
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/xo1opossum
๐Ÿ“…︎ Aug 21 2018
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
Where did Noah put all the beeโ€™s in his Ark?

In the Ark Hives.

๐Ÿ‘︎ 13k
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/JP-Seven
๐Ÿ“…︎ Sep 09 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
Need an ark?

I Noah guy.

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/Gwona
๐Ÿ“…︎ Oct 21 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
Many years after the great flood, God came to Noah again and spoke: โ€œNoah, it is my wish that you build another ark.โ€

Rather worried, Noah said โ€œBut my Lord, have the people not been good this time? Must there be another flood?โ€

โ€œNo, there will not be a flood, the people have been good.โ€ Said the Lord.

โ€œThen why another ark?โ€ Asked Noah.

โ€œI wish for this ark to only house fish.โ€ The Lord replied.

A slightly confused Noah responded โ€œOkay... I shall do as you wish my Lord.โ€

โ€œBut not just any fish; only carp.โ€ The Lord said unto him.

Noah, now more bemused, replied โ€œUh- okay my Lord.โ€

โ€œOne more thing.โ€ The Lord said unto him โ€œit needs to have multiple levels.โ€

โ€œAre you sure my Lord? What is the purpose of this? What on earth is it all for?โ€ Noah pressed.

And God said: โ€œI want you to build a multi-story carp-ark.โ€

Passed from my father unto me, to pass onto my son when he becomes a father.

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/Dongwaffler
๐Ÿ“…︎ Oct 08 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
2020 is getting worse, if you guys need an ark

I NOAH GUY

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/ineedapapaya
๐Ÿ“…︎ Sep 18 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
Why didn't the animals play cards on the Ark?

Because Noah sat on the deck.

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/big_macaroons
๐Ÿ“…︎ Jun 26 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
According to a survey, the favourite film of most hipsters is โ€œRaiders of the Lost Arkโ€.

Itโ€™s the first Indie movie.

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/porichoygupto
๐Ÿ“…︎ May 03 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
You need help with an Ark?

Donโ€™t worry, I Noah guy.

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/RachelSambr
๐Ÿ“…︎ May 03 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
Do you need an ark?

Because i Noah guy

Saw this on r/noahgettheboat. Cred to u/ryanpearson727

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/Evann808_
๐Ÿ“…︎ Feb 19 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
God said to Noah that there was a dinosaur on the ark and Noah replied only with No-ah there isnโ€™t ~joke from when I was 5
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/HuntrixMata
๐Ÿ“…︎ Jan 25 2019
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
As the animals left the ark, Noah told them to go forth and multiply. After some time, Noah came upon two snakes who were just lying there sunning themselves.

So Noah asked them, โ€Why arenโ€™t you multiplying?โ€

The snakes replied, โ€œWe canโ€™t, weโ€™re adders.โ€

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/honolulu_oahu_mod
๐Ÿ“…︎ Apr 28 2019
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
What kind of lighting did Noah use for the ark?

Floodlights and ark lights.

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/DoctorScherzando
๐Ÿ“…︎ Apr 09 2019
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
Why did the two worms have to leave their apple to get into Noah's ark?

Because they could only go in pears

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/unclerudy
๐Ÿ“…︎ Feb 08 2019
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
I think Noah's Ark should have had a barrier around it to keep out the Mexicans.

Noah fence.

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/teuast
๐Ÿ“…︎ Apr 20 2018
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
How come none of the animals on the ark could play cards?

Because Noah was standing on the deck

Credit to my dad who said this 2 seconds ago

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/Dtjordan68
๐Ÿ“…︎ Oct 28 2018
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
Any of you guys looking to buy an Ark?

I can help. I Noah guy.

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/porichoygupto
๐Ÿ“…︎ Feb 01 2018
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
Me: Dad do you know how to build an ark?

Dad: Well I do Noah guy.

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/meltedpickless
๐Ÿ“…︎ Jul 15 2018
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
The floods had subsided, and Noah had safely landed his ark on Mount Sinai. "Go forth and multiply!" he told the animals...

...and so off they went two by two, and within a few weeks Noah heard the chatter of tiny monkeys, the snarl of tiny tigers and the stomp of baby elephants.

Then he heard something he didn't recogniseโ€ฆ a loud, revving buzz coming from the woods. He went in to find out what strange animal's offspring was making this noise, and discovered a pair of snakes wielding a chainsaw.

"What on earth are you doing?" he cried. "You're destroying the trees!"

"Well Noah," the snakes replied, "we tried to multiply as you bade us, but we're addersโ€ฆ so we have to use logs."

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/bittibitti
๐Ÿ“…︎ Feb 01 2018
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
If you need an ark!

I No-ah guy!

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/TheIndrajitKar
๐Ÿ“…︎ Sep 19 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
Need an ark ?

I Noah guy

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/HellsJuggernaut
๐Ÿ“…︎ Sep 22 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
Does anybody need an ark?

I Noah guy.

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/That-Big-Man-J
๐Ÿ“…︎ Jul 24 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
Hipsters love Raiders of the Lost Ark...

...probably because it was the first Indie film.

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/Brizzo7
๐Ÿ“…︎ Sep 19 2019
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
Anyone need an ark?

I Noah guy.

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/UriahPeabody
๐Ÿ“…︎ May 23 2019
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
Need an Ark?

I Noah guy.

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/H2O_is_Great
๐Ÿ“…︎ Dec 05 2019
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
Need an Ark built?

I Noah guy

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/ootz1986
๐Ÿ“…︎ Jan 27 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
If you need an ark

I happen to noah guy

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/luxmainbtw
๐Ÿ“…︎ Feb 07 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
Does any one Noah guy who can build me an ark
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/PilotDave3
๐Ÿ“…︎ Oct 30 2019
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
Why didn't the animals play cards on the Ark?

Because Noah sat on the deck.

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/big_macaroons
๐Ÿ“…︎ Jul 26 2019
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
Wanting to build an ark?

I Noah guy.

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/YeetManJaxon
๐Ÿ“…︎ May 28 2019
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
Need to build an ark?

I noah guy

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/x_Parzival_
๐Ÿ“…︎ Aug 30 2019
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
Why didn't they play cards on the Ark?

Because Noah was standing on the deck.

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/Mistah-S
๐Ÿ“…︎ Jun 03 2019
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
If you need an ark, just hit me up cuz I Noah guy.
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/christmasbush
๐Ÿ“…︎ Mar 29 2019
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
Where did Noah keep his bees? In the Ark hives.
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/thebongreaper666
๐Ÿ“…︎ Mar 06 2019
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
The animals on the Ark wanted to play cards but they couldn't.

Noah was standing on the deck.

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/big_macaroons
๐Ÿ“…︎ Oct 26 2018
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
If you need to build an ark...

I Noah guy.

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/hotsprings1234
๐Ÿ“…︎ May 25 2019
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
I heard you need to build an ark,

I Noah guy

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/Andyh10s
๐Ÿ“…︎ Mar 26 2019
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
Anyone need an ark welder?

I Noah guy

๐Ÿ‘︎ 17
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/Degtyrev
๐Ÿ“…︎ Mar 04 2019
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
Need an Ark?

I Noah guy.

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/lala_vroom
๐Ÿ“…︎ May 08 2019
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
Why did the 2 worms get out of the apple before boarding Noah's Ark?

Because they had to go in pears.

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/2donutkid2
๐Ÿ“…︎ Feb 06 2019
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
Need an ark?

I noah guy.

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/MysteryOrange7
๐Ÿ“…︎ Jan 17 2019
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
Does anyone need an ark?

โ€˜Cause I Noah guy.

๐Ÿ‘︎ 19
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ“…︎ Dec 24 2018
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
What kind of lights did Noah use on his Ark?

Floodlights

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/Theatreofmemes
๐Ÿ“…︎ Oct 08 2017
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
What kind of lights did Noah have on the Ark?

Flood lights.

๐Ÿ‘︎ 54
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/cymyk
๐Ÿ“…︎ Nov 19 2017
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
If anyone needs an ark,

I Noah guy

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/Cumdumpster212121
๐Ÿ“…︎ Sep 11 2018
๐Ÿšจ︎ report

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