Winter Olympics Puns

He's this season's biggest luger

In the snow.

...cause it’s the capital of Hungary...

Brazil. They brought 8 Brazilian athletes.

“No ...he’s on ice”

So many obstacles to overcome just to have gotten where they've gotten.‬ It's a slippery slope but they always seem to manage their way back up to the top. Seasoned professionals!

Family was sitting down, watching the Snowboard Cross finals

Me: "Man, it'd be cool to be in the crowd for this"

Dad: "Yeah you'd probably find it so cool that it's actually cold"

25 years into his life as a dad and he's still going strong with the classics.

TV Announcer: "Coming up next, the pair skating competition."

Me: "Huh, I didn't know pears could skate."

Watching the Olympics tonight and I had a perfect opportunity.

TV shows the outside of the figure skating arena.

Wife: that building is soo cool.

Me: that is how they keep the ice in skating condition after all.

At a bar and curling is on and I make the remark "isn't it just cleaning?" Then my dad says

"do you think they have the position called sweeper"

(You're entering the conversation when it really matters)

Me: Oh nice, so did you spend time watching the Olympics?

Friend: No, I don't really watch the olympics that much actually.

Me: Same here...I only watch it every four years...

He probably has quite the hair-care bill, but I'm sure he's willing toupee for it.
It seems that everyone on the internet is Russian to say good things about him.
After his inauguration speech, everyone gave him a big hand.
His favorite winter Olympic event is the LYUUUUGE!
The other half of his supporters can be described with ancient, mystical legends: the Deep Lore-ables.
Nobody will be able to use cheap cotton drapes or table cloths after his ban on muslins.
Since the start of the cold war, many U.S. presidents have pissed off the Russians. Trump is the first to be accused of pissing ON them.
I subscribed to his newsletter because I never turn down a free MAGA-zine subscription.
Melania got used to everyone crowded into Trump Tower during the campaign. Now that everyone's gone, she looks around and it's just a little Barron.
Joke that inspired me is here : https://www.reddit.com/r/puns/comments/5p4ebt/on_donald_trumps_inaguration/

Stepdad: What's another name for the Winter Olympics?

Me: What?

Stepdad: White people Olympics.