I was thinking of getting a job at the U.S. Mint
Can you imagine the amount of money I would make?
2000’s kids are generation Z and 80’s-90’s kids are generation Y, if we keep going back we get to generation U.
If you have wine from that time is it genuine?
Using only the letters L H U T S E, how do you tell an investigator to hurry up?
What happens when the U.S. Mint stops producing currency?
I don’t know, it makes no sense.
A,B,C,D,E,F,G,H,I,J,K,M,N,O,P,Q,R,S,T,U,V,W,X,Y,Z
Just watched an episode of 24 where Jack Bauer had to decide to either help the cartel transfer cannabis crystals into the U.S within 24 hours or they would blow up the Gulf Coast states.
...It was Kief or Southernland.
Can a fencing champion born in France, but raised in the U.S. represent either country in the olympics?
Yes. Because they have duel citizenship.
A little Christmas song. A B C D E F G H I J K M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z
NO L, NO L, NO L, NO L, NO L, NO L...
In an effort to combat climate change, the U.S. Army will no longer allow rabbits to drive vehicles.
This will eliminate 75% of America’s car bunny missions.
Did you hear that U.S. Mail is starting a freight delivery service to compete with FedEx and UPS?
Apple Pie is a ridiculous $5 a slice in the U.S., but only $1 in Jamaica, the Bahamas, & the Virgin Islands
Those are the pie rates of the Caribbean
Which U.S. state is famous for its extra-small soft drinks??
I couldn't figure out why the U.S. Mint wasn't working...
But then it started to make cents.
The U.S. Army is full of crybabies
That’s why we also call them the Infantry.
The U.S. needs to stop selling pre-packaged shredded cheese!
Make America Grate Again!
In response to the American coin shortage, Canada has committed to providing the U.S. aid
The U. S. Government legally believes in demons.
After all, possession is 9/10ths of the law.
What’s the deal with people who get fired from the U.S. Mint?
None of them make cents anymore!
(with thanks for encouragement from u/sherbert_suspicious): I built a little model sports car car for my snail, and called it an S-car for Snail.
Every where he drove it, people shouted "Look at that S-Car go!"
What does u/username do when he hates the hotel he’s staying at?
*whispers* b i o l o g y p u n s . . .
Ya know everyone seems to hate the U.S right now, but I honestly think it’s pretty
I saw the headline “Trump Attacks WHO chief Over Criticisms of U.S. Approach to Coronavirus” and thought...
What the hell did Pete Townshend do?!?
Can I play World War Z without having played World War A, B, C, D, E, F, G, H, I, J, K, L, M, N, O, P, Q, R, S, T, U, V, W, X and Y before?
/r/ShouldIbuythisgame/com…
Why’s “U” used as the symbol for Potential Energy?
Because “U” have a lot of potential!
From what state in the U.S. most computers come from?
More U.S. Presidents were born in Virginia than any other state.
I guess you could say it's a Prez dispenser.
You don't often see "turtles" spelled T-U-R-D-l-e-s
because they're an endangered feces
In response to u/-umop-apisdn 's earlier post titled "Suislide" I present Sue-a-Slide
Why do mathematicians hate the U.S.?
Because it's indivisible.
The U.S.S.R Should Have Had a Different Leader in the Space Race
Who is the only U.S. president who is completely not guilty.
Abraham Lincoln, because he is "in-a-cent"
I guess it really is cold as F° in the U.S.
I’m very optimistic about the upcoming U.S. elections. I feel as though the country will be able to move forward with a strong, clear vision.
At a funeral a man sits Behind the woman who’s husband just died. The man leans forward and asks, “do u mind if I say a word?” she responds, “Not at all, please do.” the man stands up and says “plethora” and sits back down.
“Thanks,” said the woman, “that means a lot.”
Do you know why the U.S. Navy always keeps at least two canaries on board each of their submarines?
Because everyone knows that if you have a big sub you also need a good set of tweeters.
What do you call a guy hastily trying to influence U.S. elections?
Jokes all over the U.S.
Preface: I live in Ohio.
Over the years my dad and I have taken lots of trips together or vacations to different states. Well whenever he goes to pay for something with cash, thinking he's real clever, he asks the cashier if they accept Ohio money. Every. Single. Time. The cashier instantly gets super confused and kinda just stares awkwardly. Despite how dumb the joke is I honestly do get a chuckle out of how uncomfortable the cashiers get lol.
I was in my kitchen and my cousin went next to me as I was looking at the brownies, placed a fork and said fork u. + to add on to this as I was trying to take this photo the brightness wasn’t working properly so my dad’s girlfriend goes “guess you could say it’s forked”
What do you get when you cross a musical period with a U.S. president?
43 out of the 44 U.S. Presidents actually ran for office.
FDR just rolled in there.
Which U.S. state is the sluttiest?
The one where everyone goes around saying "I da hoe*"
A, B, D, E, F, G, H, I, J, K, L, M, N, O, P, Q, R, S, T, U, V, W, X, Y, & Z are all racists.. How do I know?
Because they're all not 'C's.
I have updated the alphabet for festive period. A, B, C, D, E, F, G, H, I, J, K, M, N, O, P, Q, R, S, T, U, V, W, X, Y, Z
Why do mathematicians hate the U.S.?
Because it's indivisible.
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