An alternate world where it's illegal to make or even touch puns. Punsmiths are protesting against this.
There's a pun crying to be made here, but I can't put my finger on it.
I bee-leave I can touch the sky
The water asked the sand if it could touch it ?
What do you call it when a girl's butt looks hot but is really cold to the touch?
Why doesn't Covid touch kids?
The best way to get in touch with your long lost relatives....
....is to win the lottery.
One day, the Earth and the Sea met. The Sea asked the Earth: "Can I touch you?"
The Earth answered: "Shore"
My wife told me to be more in touch with my feminine side...
A football player goes to the doctor and says "It hurts whenever I touch my face, knee and elbow." The doctor says,
"You've broken your hand."
I found out today that I like it when experienced men touch me
And then I paid the chiropractor
There's something that I don't like about "DO NOT TOUCH" signs.
I just can't put my finger on it.
Walked past a pallet of nacho cheese at Costco today. Looked my daughter in the eye and said, “Dylan, don’t touch”
10 years ago I promised to myself not to touch a drop of drink while I'm at work.
I haven't touched a job since.
I saw a guy going around telling people to touch a naked wire he has been carrying with him.
My wife asked me to get in touch with my more feminine side
My wife told me to be more in touch with my feminine side
So I crashed the car and didn't talk to her all day for no reason.
I saw a sign that said 'do not touch', however there was something weird about the sign....
I couldn't put my finger on it....
Sometimes I touch my knees to my chest and lean forward,
Why would everything be different without a sense of touch?
Because we wouldn’t know how to feel
What do you call a math problem that you can touch and feel?
Son: “Daddy why is that ‘do not touch’ sign there?”
Dad: “I dunno son, I can’t quite put my finger on it.”
We all have that on relative who breaks everything they touch. Mine is my...
The easiest way to get in touch with inner self...
is to buy one ply toilet paper
Just saw a guy touch his cow's udder
I got in touch with my inner self today.
That's the last time I use cheap toilet paper.
There’s this really out of touch old janitor that works at my office building.
At least he’s an ok broomer.
Since I moved to a plant based diet I lost touch with the fun guys.
Quick health warning: You can’t touch this.
A man had a chainsaw accident and lost 2 fingers. He lost 20% of his touch.
Something's wrong with my touch screen.
I can’t put my finger on it.
The guy who created the sign "Caution Do Not Touch" in braille,
Call me a thermostat because only my dad's allowed to touch me
Why should you never touch an electric fence
Somebody touch a my spaghett
Uh...... Do I need to wash my eyes if I touch them
"Don't touch" has to be one of the most terrifying things to read in Braille
My daughter had to stick her hand in a sack to try to guess the type of material by touch...
A genie granted me one wish. I wanted to be rich, but didn't want to deal with the IRS and decided I wanted wealth as I needed it. So I wished for the touch of Midas.
After that, everything I touched turned into a muffler.
I'd you ever need to get in touch with a bike company
Please don't touch my new tattoo. It's a little bit-saw.
Blonde: "Doctor, I have pain all over my body. Everywhere I touch hurts".
Doctor: "Your finger is broken".
My wife told me to be more in touch with with my feminine side....
My wife told me to be more in touch with my feminine side
My wife told me to be more in touch with my feminine side
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