Toothpastes Puns

I was Crest-fallen.

A toiletry

Sadly, there was no plaque on it.

Because you’ll destroy your stomach cavity!

So if you have a dental implant, and brush with blue toothpaste, what do you call it?

A Bluetooth device.

Courtesy of my seven-year-old son, who is getting the hang of this pun thing.

Don't worry, they're all in mint condition.

I'm crestfallen.

just a sec. i’ve been told it’s actually a Colgate

It was a nice change of paste

I'm still an asshole

I was crest fallen

Fluoride-a.

I called it Nonsenseodyne.

Next time, I’ll ask for teethpaste.

So my dad was going through his normal morning ritual, when he screamed "GODDAMMIT" from the bathroom. He walked out a few minutes later, looking sad.

Me: "What was the yelling about?"

Dad: "I dropped my toothpaste."

Me: "That made you upset?"

Dad: "No, ZTheJerk. Upset doesn't cover it. I'm absolutely crestfallen."

The flavor is "mint to be".

Now all I need is a toothbrush.

Coalgate.

What did the toothpaste wear to the club? --A tube top!

So I tried it but it didn't mend my car at all.

It isnt mint to be swallowed.

Crest-ianity.

Crestfallen.

...so as to avoid floss-contamination.

I told her, "Ya win some, ya lose gums!".

Apparently some toothpaste companies are on Santa's naughty list. Many are calling it the Coalgate Scandal.

He's really crestfallen about it.

...she felt "crestfallen."

Because it was in mint condition.

Me: "Oh yeah, I need to put toothpaste on the grocery list."

Dad: "Don't do that! It'll be all messy!"

Technically, he did. FFS Dad

I was crestfallen.

I'm crestfallen.

He said crestfallen.