Question About Empanadas...
So there is this super amazing girl, and she loves two things. Puns and empanadas. I want to ask her to prom while gifting her with many beef empanadas, but I really want to find a pun to use on her as I present the tray of food. Do you guys have any empanada based puns?
A reporter interviewed a 103-year old woman: “And what is the best thing about being 103?” the reporter asked.
The woman simply replied, “No peer pressure.”
My doctor says that when you die, your pupils are the last thing to go.
Do you know whats the best thing about dead batteries?
The only thing Flat-Earthers fear...
Planetary ratings are a thing
I’m addicted to abusing nuns, I just can’t not hit them, the only thing that’s worked for me is redirecting it to somebody else.
I’m trying really hard to kick the abbot
There are so many different things you can do with spaghetti.
It’s mind-blowing to think of all the pasta-bilities.
Things we do for a cigarette
A Freudian slip is when you say one thing
Wait, I think I got the whole dating thing wrong
What's the best thing about dating a geologist?
If you spell the words “Absolutely Nothing” backwards, you get “Gnihton Yletulosba,” which ironically means...
My son just told me to stop making up things about him.
Which is strange, because I don’t have any kids.
What do you call 2 birds stuck together?
Best thing about immigrating to Switzerland?
Well for starters the flag is a big plus...
My friend asked me if Princess Bride jokes are still a thing
I said, “they’re mostly dead”
In spite of all our disagreements on Reddit, I’m glad about one thing.
Every one reading this is on the same page.
Edit: Thanks guys. This is way too much love.
What’s the one thing an undercover cop doesn’t need?
Buying vacuums has to be the most confusing thing ever....
You buy the one that sucks the most
Three things Christ promises he will never do: Won't leave you broken-hearted (Psalm 147:3), won't reject you (John 6:37), and won't leave you nor forsake you (Hebrews 13:5).
In essence, Jesus is never gonna give you up, never gonna let you down, never gonna run around and desert you.
When your friends know you love puns and send you things like this >>>>>>
if someone is always organizing things then they have OCD. If someone is always eating things, then they have...
By buddies and I were drinking beer and cracking jokes, but things started to get out of hand.
It was quite the brew-haha.
It's the little things that count (also a T-rex's arms)
https://www.instagram.com/standup.trex/
https://preview.redd.it/9449vyyyj4f61.png?width=620&format=png&auto=webp&s=4f5d46a86d95447af0958da58a8583a00398e36f
I'm trying to thing of a dad. joke about getting my first job
What's the one thing the elderly T-Rex wished it didn't catch?
I've been reading so many horrible things about drinking and smoking recently, that I've made a firm new year's resolution..
What’s the best thing about a Buddhist casino?
What do you call it when a tiny Humpty Dumpty is saying derogatory things in a Slavic language?
If there's one thing I own that's remarkable
Cats in Communist countries are forced to eat the same thing every day and it affects their health!
Now they all have Mousey Tongue.
What is the most valuable thing in the world?
All this stress lately has me trying new things. For example, I've discovered that brake fluid is actually delicious. I'm up to a case a day, but there's no need to worry about me.
What's the first thing the taxi driver said to the wolf?
My wife was hurrying me along and asking when things were going to be done so I asked her if she was my clone from Moscow. She looked confused and said "No, why?"
I said "Because you're Russian me."
Before this whole lockdown thing, I went to a musical.
I didn't like it. Too much sax and violins.
Of all the things I learned while in grade school...
I never thought trying to avoid cooties would be the most useful thing at this stage of my life.
Interviewer: Your resume says you take things too literally
Me: When did my resume learn to talk?
The last thing my grandfather said before he died was, “It’s worth it to spend money on good speakers.”
That was some sound advice.
From the moment I saw you I knew I wanted to do unspeakable things with you....
What are Uruguayans’ favourite thing to watch?
I confronted a mime today.
He did unspeakable things.
Thank you for the awards. You made my day 😃
Are physical puns a thing here? I'm just gonna leave this here
Son: Dad, will invisible airplanes ever be a thing?
Dad: I just can't see them taking off.
My doctor said that when you die, your pupils are the last thing to go....
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