During covid, my orthodontist told my I should tend to my teeth by myself.

β€œHow?” I asked.

He said β€œBrace yourself.”

πŸ‘︎ 83
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/UnchartedQuasar
πŸ“…︎ Jun 30
🚨︎ report
What's red and bad for your teeth ?

A brick

πŸ‘︎ 15
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/HellsJuggernaut
πŸ“…︎ Jun 13
🚨︎ report
What do you call someone with red teeth?

Gingervitis

xP

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/SamWize-Ganji
πŸ“…︎ Jun 24
🚨︎ report
What do you call a bear with no teeth?

A gummy bear!

πŸ‘︎ 12
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/pakistani_pizza
πŸ“…︎ Jun 02
🚨︎ report
What do you call a dinosaur that takes good care of his teeth?

A floss-o-raptor

πŸ‘︎ 68
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/WheezyDaStarfish
πŸ“…︎ May 03
🚨︎ report
If a grizzly loses all his front teeth...

...he turns into a molar bear.

πŸ‘︎ 18
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/KW-DadJoker
πŸ“…︎ Jun 03
🚨︎ report
My mother's mother lost her false teeth at the retirement home. We searched the place everywhere but couldn't find them.

We looked in every nook and granny!

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ May 21
🚨︎ report
My wife to our son, "Go brush your teeth with your sister"

Me from the other room, "No, use a toothbrush".

πŸ‘︎ 12k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/_Soter_
πŸ“…︎ Oct 20 2019
🚨︎ report
What’s red and bad for your teeth?

A brick.

πŸ‘︎ 14
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Wutisthis66204
πŸ“…︎ Apr 02
🚨︎ report
What do kids in Russia say as they clean their teeth?

Brussia brussia brussia brussia

πŸ‘︎ 7
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Skwirler
πŸ“…︎ Apr 26
🚨︎ report
What do you call the soft tissue between a shark’s teeth?

The slowest swimmer.

πŸ‘︎ 6
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Arkham_Asylum27
πŸ“…︎ Apr 26
🚨︎ report
My dentist sold his socks after checking my teeth

he had incisor information

πŸ‘︎ 8
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/hotsprings1234
πŸ“…︎ Mar 22
🚨︎ report
What letters are bad for your teeth?

D K

πŸ‘︎ 32
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/i_hate_android_p
πŸ“…︎ Feb 24
🚨︎ report
If you want to know what a magician uses to brush his teeth...

...just wait until bed time, Oral-B revealed.

πŸ‘︎ 12
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/ron_mcphatty
πŸ“…︎ Feb 22
🚨︎ report
What’s red and bad for you’re teeth?

A Brick.

πŸ‘︎ 75
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/MrSisterFister20
πŸ“…︎ Nov 28 2019
🚨︎ report
Southern (US) dadjoke: Better brush ya teeth afore ya wind up with summer teeth!

Daughter: What are summer teeth?

Me: Well. Summer there. But some ain't.

πŸ‘︎ 8
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/breakone9r
πŸ“…︎ Feb 09
🚨︎ report
I was brushing my daughter’s teeth...

My five year old daughter had a blue colored sucker before bed. As I was brushing her teeth, I noticed they were a bit discolored.

β€œHey! You’ve got Bluetooth!” I said.

πŸ‘︎ 15
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/byrd107
πŸ“…︎ Jan 30
🚨︎ report
The best time to brush your teeth

Two-th dirty

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/AntiSubSonic
πŸ“…︎ Feb 11
🚨︎ report
What kind of photos do teeth take?

Tooth-pics

πŸ‘︎ 9
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/BlankPhotos
πŸ“…︎ Dec 29 2019
🚨︎ report
I was worried my dentist wouldn’t clean my teeth properly.

Every wall in his his office was covered in plaque.

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/boogerknows
πŸ“…︎ Dec 26 2019
🚨︎ report
Where does Obama get his teeth cleaned? The prese-dental place #michaelporiginal
πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/figgerer
πŸ“…︎ Nov 24 2019
🚨︎ report
What do you call a panda with no teeth ?

A gummy Bear

πŸ‘︎ 7
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/xd_Velociraptor
πŸ“…︎ Dec 12 2019
🚨︎ report
You know the what's brown and sticky. Well what's black and bad for your teeth?

A bowling ball

πŸ‘︎ 15
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Panda2377
πŸ“…︎ Oct 08 2019
🚨︎ report
How are false teeth like stars?

They come out at night!

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/notdadbot
πŸ“…︎ Nov 17 2019
🚨︎ report
Do you know why they banned those red coloring dental tablets that revealed where you hadn’t brushed your teeth properly?

Because every time your dentist gave them to you she dyed a little inside!

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Tarynxm
πŸ“…︎ Dec 12 2019
🚨︎ report
What do you call a boomerang made of teeth?

I don't remember the punchline and it's probably gonna come back to bite me.

πŸ‘︎ 63
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/BinaryPeach
πŸ“…︎ Aug 25 2019
🚨︎ report
How did the lumberjack lose all his teeth?

Axe-identally

edit: I don’t know how jokes work

πŸ‘︎ 33
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/thevectorvictor
πŸ“…︎ Sep 04 2019
🚨︎ report
Most people have 32 teeth and some have 6, it's simple meth.
πŸ‘︎ 74
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/bot_10
πŸ“…︎ Oct 10 2019
🚨︎ report
My wife started bleeding after flossing her teeth

I told her I normally throw my hip out whenever I floss

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/f00ls_f0liage
πŸ“…︎ Nov 04 2019
🚨︎ report
What do you call a bear with no teeth?

A gummy bear

My 5yo came up with this on his own, I know it’s probably been done before. He got a laugh and is proud of himself.

πŸ‘︎ 11
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/mooncricket18
πŸ“…︎ Oct 12 2019
🚨︎ report
What’s red, square and bad for your teeth?

A really really fast brick

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/scottdereddit101
πŸ“…︎ Nov 21 2019
🚨︎ report
What is free and full of teeth

A smile :)

πŸ‘︎ 9
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Nov 08 2019
🚨︎ report
I took a bite out of French bread while my teeth were hurting.

It was a bit of a pain.

πŸ‘︎ 8
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/TheBellsprout101
πŸ“…︎ Sep 23 2019
🚨︎ report
Where do killer whales go to get their teeth aligned?

The orcadontist

πŸ‘︎ 33
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/tsengpaii
πŸ“…︎ Sep 01 2019
🚨︎ report
What do you use to measure the sharpness of a vampires teeth?

The fangle

πŸ‘︎ 7
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/MahogArnie
πŸ“…︎ Nov 02 2019
🚨︎ report
Hey dad what's the first thing a monster eats after getting his teeth checked?

Son: The Dentist

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Nov 01 2019
🚨︎ report
What do you call a saw with no teeth?

A gnaw

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/SpiritvsRobot
πŸ“…︎ Nov 09 2019
🚨︎ report
Why do wizards clean their teeth three times a day?

To prevent bat breath!

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/notdadbot
πŸ“…︎ Oct 28 2019
🚨︎ report
So we met a grizzly with no teeth

His name was a gummy bear

πŸ‘︎ 16
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/karrotmeimei
πŸ“…︎ Sep 25 2019
🚨︎ report
Dracula just have me his teeth but I didn't need them

I told him, 'Fangs for nothing'

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/GaryTheKnight
πŸ“…︎ Oct 31 2019
🚨︎ report
Wife: Anything on my teeth?

Me: Enamel

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/jangooni
πŸ“…︎ Oct 16 2019
🚨︎ report
A friend of mine just got her wisdom teeth taken out but still wants to go to a party tonight
πŸ‘︎ 23
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/j1mmyb01
πŸ“…︎ Apr 27 2019
🚨︎ report
What did the father teeth say to his son before the trip?

BUCCAL UP SON!

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/evamPUNdit
πŸ“…︎ Jul 26 2019
🚨︎ report
Sets of teeth are all essentially the same

Once you've seen one, you've seenamel

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/SapphicGarnet
πŸ“…︎ Sep 15 2019
🚨︎ report
What do you call someone who writes about teeth?

An authordontist.

πŸ‘︎ 10
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/drCrankoPhone
πŸ“…︎ Aug 30 2019
🚨︎ report
I got all four of my wisdom teeth removed. I'm no longer wise but I'm very hole-y.

Because I'm full of holes and everything hurts.

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/ktmp93
πŸ“…︎ Jul 02 2019
🚨︎ report
Mothers around the country keep sinking their teeth into Limp Bizkit’s frontman

Another mom bites the Durst.

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/smitemight
πŸ“…︎ Jun 28 2019
🚨︎ report
Ive found that there are negatives and positives to getting your wisdom teeth removed

Unfortunately I can’t eat much of anything for about a week but the good thing is I’ve lost about 8 pounds since the surgery! Who knew they weighed so much

πŸ‘︎ 11
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/0bserv3r_
πŸ“…︎ Aug 13 2019
🚨︎ report
My Summer teeth are here

Summer Yellow

Summer missing

πŸ‘︎ 21
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/slutforchristmas
πŸ“…︎ Jun 20 2019
🚨︎ report
What do u call a bear with no teeth?

A gummy bear

πŸ‘︎ 12
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Rmill13
πŸ“…︎ May 27 2019
🚨︎ report
What is red and not good for your teeth?

Bricks

πŸ‘︎ 21
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Hellothisismyass
πŸ“…︎ May 05 2019
🚨︎ report
Why did the rapper get gold teeth?

He wanted to put his money where his mouth is

πŸ‘︎ 92
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/unclerudy
πŸ“…︎ Feb 04 2019
🚨︎ report
Me: "Be good with oral hygiene. Buying new teeth is really expensive."

Dad: "False."

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/JoeFas
πŸ“…︎ Aug 04 2019
🚨︎ report
What do you call a bear with no teeth?

A gummi bear

πŸ‘︎ 37
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Feb 27 2019
🚨︎ report
True story: my daughter was playing a pet-salon game on her iPad and said to me: "Hey dad, I've just worked out that if you just brush their teeth over and over you get experience points faster." To which I replied: "You shouldn't grind your teeth."
πŸ‘︎ 294
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/shadowfax1138
πŸ“…︎ Dec 08 2018
🚨︎ report
I got my wisdom teeth removed today, and my dad asks me β€œdoes your face hurt?”

β€œCause it’s killing me!”

Love him.

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/berkeliyum
πŸ“…︎ May 20 2019
🚨︎ report
This is one my 7 year old son said to me... I had a closed fist up to my face with my little finger extended and picking food out of my teeth. My thumb was also extended out. He looked at me and with a smirk on his face said to me...

Who's on the phone dad?

πŸ‘︎ 24
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Pearly351
πŸ“…︎ Mar 17 2019
🚨︎ report
Stop me if you’ve heard this one about wisdom teeth.

[removed]

πŸ‘︎ 59
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/coot32
πŸ“…︎ Oct 21 2018
🚨︎ report
What do you call George Washington's false teeth?

Presidentures

πŸ‘︎ 377
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/danwright32
πŸ“…︎ Mar 07 2018
🚨︎ report
What's red and bad for your teeth?

A brick

πŸ‘︎ 11
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/PacEffect
πŸ“…︎ May 29
🚨︎ report
What do you call a bear with no teeth?

A gummy bear

πŸ‘︎ 92
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Mar 28
🚨︎ report
What do you call a bear with no teeth?

Gummy bear

πŸ‘︎ 21
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/jarvedttudd
πŸ“…︎ Mar 25
🚨︎ report
What is red and is bad for your teeth?

A brick.

πŸ‘︎ 90
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Dec 20 2019
🚨︎ report
What's red and bad for your teeth?

A brick.

πŸ‘︎ 16
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Spotter66
πŸ“…︎ Jan 26
🚨︎ report
What's red and bad for your teeth?

A brick

πŸ‘︎ 20
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/kickypie
πŸ“…︎ Jan 20
🚨︎ report
What do you call a bear with no teeth?

A gummy bear!

πŸ‘︎ 58
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/notdadbot
πŸ“…︎ Nov 16 2019
🚨︎ report
What's red and bad for your teeth?

A Brick.

πŸ‘︎ 27
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/notdadbot
πŸ“…︎ Nov 10 2019
🚨︎ report
What’s red and bad for your teeth?

A brick

πŸ‘︎ 18
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Depressed_Citrus
πŸ“…︎ Dec 15 2019
🚨︎ report
What do you call a bear with no teeth?

A gummy bear!

πŸ‘︎ 12
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/notdadbot
πŸ“…︎ Nov 01 2019
🚨︎ report
what’s red and bad for your teeth?

a brick

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/CowSensei
πŸ“…︎ Dec 07 2019
🚨︎ report
What's red and bad for your teeth?

A Brick.

πŸ‘︎ 9
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/notdadbot
πŸ“…︎ Nov 15 2019
🚨︎ report
What’s red and bad for your teeth?

A brick

πŸ‘︎ 14
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/en_K75
πŸ“…︎ Aug 15 2019
🚨︎ report
What do you call a bear with no teeth?

A gummy bear!

πŸ‘︎ 6
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/notdadbot
πŸ“…︎ Nov 17 2019
🚨︎ report
How are false teeth like stars?

They come out at night!

πŸ‘︎ 6
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/notdadbot
πŸ“…︎ Nov 18 2019
🚨︎ report
How are false teeth like stars?

They come out at night!

πŸ‘︎ 9
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/notdadbot
πŸ“…︎ Nov 10 2019
🚨︎ report
How are false teeth like stars?

They come out at night!

πŸ‘︎ 9
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/notdadbot
πŸ“…︎ Nov 11 2019
🚨︎ report
How are false teeth like stars?

They come out at night!

πŸ‘︎ 8
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/notdadbot
πŸ“…︎ Nov 03 2019
🚨︎ report
What's red and bad for your teeth?

A brick

πŸ‘︎ 24
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/HEADLESSZOMB13
πŸ“…︎ Jul 20 2019
🚨︎ report
What do you call a bear with no teeth?

A gummy bear.

πŸ‘︎ 43
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/beatenthem
πŸ“…︎ Aug 25 2019
🚨︎ report
What do you call a bear with no teeth?

A gummy bear!

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/ikennaezeee
πŸ“…︎ Nov 02 2019
🚨︎ report
What's red and bad for your teeth?

A Brick.

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/notdadbot
πŸ“…︎ Nov 09 2019
🚨︎ report
What is red and bad for your teeth?

A brick. 🧱

πŸ‘︎ 17
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/C0DE_SYP
πŸ“…︎ Aug 01 2019
🚨︎ report
What’s red and bad for your teeth...

A brick

πŸ‘︎ 7
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Asharkinator
πŸ“…︎ Oct 07 2019
🚨︎ report
What do you call a bear with no teeth?

A gummy bear

πŸ‘︎ 70
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/top_gunj
πŸ“…︎ May 23 2019
🚨︎ report
What is red and bad for your teeth?

A brick

πŸ‘︎ 21
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/MetalswedeJr
πŸ“…︎ May 26 2019
🚨︎ report
Why do wizards clean their teeth three times a day?

To prevent bat breath!

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/notdadbot
πŸ“…︎ Oct 24 2019
🚨︎ report
What do you call a bear with no teeth?

A gummy bear

πŸ‘︎ 27
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/wholeangelada
πŸ“…︎ Jul 30 2019
🚨︎ report
What do you call a bear with no teeth?

A gummy bear.

πŸ‘︎ 17
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Gertjan-96
πŸ“…︎ Jul 13 2019
🚨︎ report
What do you call a bear with no teeth...

A gummy bear

πŸ‘︎ 11
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/dullishmink5313
πŸ“…︎ Jun 20 2019
🚨︎ report
What do you call a bear with no teeth

Gummy Bear!

πŸ‘︎ 8
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/bobo1234567777777
πŸ“…︎ Jul 01 2019
🚨︎ report
What do you call a bear with no teeth?

A gummy bear!

πŸ‘︎ 10
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/dohpaz42
πŸ“…︎ Jun 04 2019
🚨︎ report
What's red and bad for your teeth?

A brick.

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/steveb106
πŸ“…︎ Jun 10 2019
🚨︎ report

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