RIP.
Picking up the torn pages, his friend asked, “Why Euripides?”
It's a Can'tRip
All he said was “I don’t know what you’re talcum ‘bout.”
“You know, one would have been enough.”
I replied, “I'm on the toilet, please advise…”
even the cake was in tiers.
Edit: Thank you so much guys! I never expected this to reach 10k upvotes! You guys truly made my day.
It hurts like heck but at least I’m not crying
11 years old and he still doesn't know my name is Brian.
But now that we had a few drinks, we feel better.
Sofa sew good.
It was stuck in a crack.
He said, "No hablo Ingles."
Hugo Weaving
...independent!"
I had an elderly patient today who was visibly upset, almost to the point of tears. I asked her if she was worried about having her blood drawn and she said that the blood draw didn’t bother her, but that she was upset because she had hit a cat with her car on the way to her appointment this morning. She said that she didn’t know who the cat belonged to and that she had it wrapped up in a blanket in her car. I asked her how badly the cat was hurt and she said “I think he’s going to be alright. I just clipped the hind end of him, but his tail is just barely hanging on. After I leave here, I’m taking him straight to Wal-Mart.”
I told her that she might be better off taking the cat to a veterinary clinic instead of Wal-Mart and she said, “but it’s just his tail, and Wal-Mart is the largest retailer in North America!”
Thanks for every ting.
Keanu Sleeves
They’ll probably kneed surgery.
One called Justin and the other called Kristian. The prawns were constantly being harassed and threatened by sharks that inhabited the area:
Finally one day Justin said to Kristian. "I'm fed up with being a prawn. I wish I was a shark and then I wouldn't have any worries about being eaten."
A large mysterious cod appeared and said. "Your wish is granted" Low and behold, Justin turned into a shark. Horrified, Kristian immediately swam away, afraid of being eaten by his old mate.
Time passed (as it does) and Justin found life as a shark boring and lonely All his old mates simply swam away whenever he came close to them. Justin didn't realise that his new menacing appearance was the cause of his sad plight.
While swimming alone one day he saw the mysterious cod again and he thought perhaps the mysterious fish could change him back into a prawn..
He approached the cod and begged to be changed back, and, lo and behold, he found himself turned back into a prawn.
With tears of joy in his tiny little eyes Justin swam to Kristian's home. As he opened the coral gate, memories came flooding back. He banged on the door and shouted. "It's me, Justin, your old friend, come out and see me again."
Kristian replied. "No way man, you'll eat me. You're now a shark, the enemy and I'll not be tricked into being your dinner." Justin cried back. "No, I'm not. That was the old me. I've changed....... I've found Cod. I'm a Prawn again Kristian!!.. 🤪🤣
But my wife thinks its tear-able
It was an aye-sore.
He turned towards me and said, "One would've been enough, son."
Y’know, one would have been enough.
19 years old and he still does not know my name is Luke
"you know, one would have been enough"
Y'know, one would have been enough.
[removed]
He is 11 years old and still doesn't know my name is Brian
11 years old and he still doesnt know my name is Brian
11 years old and he still doesn't know my name is Brian.
"You know, one would have been enough."
“You know, one would have been enough.”
11 years old and he still doesn't know my name is Brian.
She wrote: “If you are sleeping, send me your dreams. If you are laughing, send me your smile. If you are eating, send me a bite. If you are drinking, send me a sip. If you are crying, send me your tears. I love you.”
Her husband texted back: “I’m on the toilet, please advise.”
"Can I have a book mark" I burst out in tears, he's 11 years old and can't remember that my name is Brian
...independent!"
11 years old and he still doesn't know my name is Brian.
