Me, to my wife: They said that the Covid vaccines are safe and has no side effects.
My wife: Who did?
Me: Yep.
The best safe word to use during sex is “meatloaf”
Because it means, “I would do anything for love, but I won’t do that”
Is it safe to assume this subreddits fav marvel character is The PUNisher
Is it safe to say the people employed near Big Ben in London are....
....working around the clock?
Upon seeing a gorgeous girl at the party, I knew I had to meet her. So I approached and told her about a special-purpose ship designed to move and navigate through frozen waters, and provide safe waterways for other boats and ships.
I've used it before and it works. It's the perfect icebreaker.
My friend knows just who he can trust in the seedy part of town to get him safe candy and sweets...
Mama is this safe to eat?
No honey... it’s for storing our valuables.
I just sold a house with ferns throughout and a safe in the attic
The buyers loved that it was fully fernished with a vaulted ceiling
What's the worst safe word you can use during sex?
"Race car"
It can be read either way.
How do you open the safe at the deli?
You use the Italian combo.
Fly straight and stay safe, boys
How is everyone staying safe during the pandemic at the north pole?
They use a lot of hand santatizer.
Is this safe to eat?
No, the safe stores valuable objects.
How do you keep people safe during the pandemic?
Thermite be another way to crack this safe.
With a pandemic happening, I said to my nurse friend: "Stay safe!"
Their response: “You, too; stay negative!"
It’s probably not safe for me to be driving this car right now.
But hey, bad brakes have never stopped me before.
Wife: Remember to practice safe snacks and to use condiments
Me: Baby stop, you’re making me hungry
Keep safe during this pandemic and use an old padded bra to make yourself a comfortable mask. Just make sure you use the left cup...
Because if you use the right one you will look like a right tit.
How do you tell a priest to stay safe?
Tell him to exorcise caution
Grocery store lettuce know we can leaf with safe food
My safe word is “banana”.
Afterward, I say, “Orange you glad I didn’t say banana?”.
Our cat came home from the vet allergy safe.
In college my nickname was safe cracker.
Not because I was good at cracking safes but because I was a non-threatening white guy.
It’s safe to say Pancake Tuesday has really...
Crêpe’d up on me this year
Chick-fil-A is the only safe restaurant right now
They wash their hands religiously
It was a it concerning that the zoo had such a low fence for the Bobcat exhibit. We knew we were safe when we realized it was distracted by the Deere next door.
I have long shelf in my kitchen where i put the meat at the top. It’s safe to say...
I visited some blind friends who told they did not feel safe at home.
Is the pool safe for diving?
Where will you always be safe from the grim reaper?
Terrible Accident (sad, but safe for work)
Did you hear about the man who lost the left side of his body in a horrible accident?
The nurse said there was not much left, but the doctor said he’d be all right.
Everybody's safe word should be Meatloaf
Because I'll do anything for love, but I won't do that.
Mama, is this safe to eat?
No honey, it's for holding valuables.
The best safe word a person can use is 'Meatloaf'….
Cos I would do anything for love, but I won't do that.
Is the pool safe for diving?
Is the pool safe for diving?
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