Water slides might seem harmless, but they are actually quite addictive....

It's a slippery slope

πŸ‘︎ 12
πŸ‘€︎ u/Twigsnapper
πŸ“…︎ Apr 16 2016
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Caution: Tinder meetups can cause sparks to fly

Don't worry though, they're harmless without any matches

πŸ‘︎ 10
πŸ“…︎ Jan 06 2021
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When does a joke become a dad joke ?

When it beocmes apparent

πŸ‘︎ 273
πŸ‘€︎ u/HahaNotSoFunnycom
πŸ“…︎ Jul 09 2020
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Fun fact

5 out of 6 people find Russian roulette harmless.

πŸ‘︎ 49
πŸ‘€︎ u/butthole5555
πŸ“…︎ Feb 23 2020
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Cigarettes are like hamsters.

They are perfectly harmless until you stick one in your mouth and light it on fire.

πŸ‘︎ 14
πŸ‘€︎ u/Jo-Sizzle
πŸ“…︎ Feb 15 2020
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What is similar between a cigarette and a hamster?

They’re both harmless until you stick it in you mouth and set it on fire.

πŸ‘︎ 6
πŸ‘€︎ u/IvoryBeats
πŸ“…︎ Jan 23 2020
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There's this crackhead in my neighborhood...

There's this crackhead in my neighborhood who is so skinny, everyone calls him "Ribs." Overall he's pretty harmless, but one day we were sitting in the front yard with our toddler in the playpen and he wanted to make the case that we should hire him to babysit. He picked up my son and started making his pitch. Most people would probably freak out as this point, but I just calmly looked at him and said politely, "I want my baby back, Ribs."

πŸ‘︎ 42
πŸ‘€︎ u/mrthatsthat
πŸ“…︎ Mar 31 2018
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Dad Joked a customer last night.

I work as a bartender at a classy cheese and wine bar in the DC area. Last night after some harmless flirting with some middle aged ladies, one exclaimed, "Sauvignon Blanc! That's my white jam!"

I replied, "Ma'am that's actually a wine, not a jam."

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ‘€︎ u/TheSheepdog
πŸ“…︎ Jul 30 2016
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My dad would have been proud

I took my two kids (4 and 6) to the new aquarium in our city. They have a petting tank with harmless bamboo sharks. I reach in to the tank. 4 year old: "Is it dangerous?" Me: "Yep" and get a good look of slight fear from him. I then pull my hand out with my ring finger bent over and show it to him. He responds with a look of abject horror. 6 year old: "Stop messing with us!" Unfold my finger and show them. My 4 year old was not amused.

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ‘€︎ u/Kitty2228
πŸ“…︎ Mar 19 2014
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