No one ever addresses the elephant in the room.
This award is my crowning achievement but this is the only plaque that’s allowed in my house.
Apparently they are looking for a man with a big moo-stash.
"E” “I” “E” “I” “O"
The practitioner uttered through a smile, “just what the doctor ordered”.
but they're the ones that keep requesting contactless delivery!
I think my delivery may be off.
I lost my phone and asked my dad if he could call it and his response was to yell “lolabean’s phone!” and then laugh hysterically and ask for a high five
I will never part with this.
They were all arrested for third-degree murder.
Me: "it wasn't there already!?"
It was a golden opportunity.
You could say I'm partial to them.
Well, they said there weren't any strings attached
Sounds like an inoculate conception
That's the last time i order from oedipal arrangements!
My dad had some icing from cinnamon rolls on his hand, so when he went to give me my gift (bike), he got some of the icing on it.
Me: "Dad, can you get me a napkin or something to wipe the icing off?"
Dad: "Why? You got a pretty sweet ride!"
She said she would be moooov'd.
I just got dad joked by my wife. :)
