The new year eve countdown has begun
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Thumbs0fDestiny
πŸ“…︎ Dec 31 2019
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Today is New Year Eve

See you next decade

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Ashaika
πŸ“…︎ Dec 31 2019
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I really wish I had made a pun about how we celebrate New Years Eve in Times Square.

I really dropped the ball on that one.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/ajd011394
πŸ“…︎ Jan 01 2020
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This year’s New Year’s Eve glasses will give you 20/20 vision
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πŸ‘€︎ u/FuckMyPillow
πŸ“…︎ Jun 03 2019
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I always get really nervous about New Year's Eve...

The doctor said I have Auld Lang-syiety.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Firework_Sandwich
πŸ“…︎ May 06 2019
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Did you hear they are trying to get Barbara Walters to host the New Years Eve ball drop?

We will bring in the New Year with "I am Barbara Walters and this is 2020"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/liveyourdash3
πŸ“…︎ Apr 18 2019
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I cant wait for new years eve 2020

Ill put on those novelty 2020 glasses and proudly say i have 2020 vision

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πŸ‘€︎ u/CaptainCcoward
πŸ“…︎ Dec 01 2018
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Every year on New Year's Eve, when everyone's counting down the final 10 seconds to ring in the new year, I get up off the couch and stand up. I stand up and raise my left leg and just leave it raised for a little while until the countdown finishes and midnight strikes

that way I always start the new year off on the right foot

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πŸ“…︎ Nov 30 2018
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I will be sitting in the toilet at new years eve 11:59 pm...

I'll be like same shit different year

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πŸ‘€︎ u/mounis11
πŸ“…︎ Dec 28 2018
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New Year's Eve was great, we should do it more often
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ImBusyGoAway
πŸ“…︎ Jan 08 2019
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I had to throw out all the snacks my wife made for New Year's Eve as soon as the ball dropped

They were a year old

πŸ‘︎ 10
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Joey_Jingle_Bells
πŸ“…︎ Jan 01 2019
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I feel like every dad says this around New Year’s Eve

See you next year!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/MoistPizzaRolls
πŸ“…︎ Dec 31 2018
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The giant Dumbo ad playing at Times Square on new year's eve said "Happy New Year"...

It should have said "Happy New Ear" instead.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/NewWhirledOrder
πŸ“…︎ Jan 01 2019
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New Year’s Eve was so last year. reddit.com/r/Showerthough…
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πŸ‘€︎ u/nalaismypet
πŸ“…︎ Jan 01 2019
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Who was also celebrating the first New Years Eve?

New Years Adam.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/x3astu
πŸ“…︎ Dec 27 2018
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The worst time to be an eye doctor has to be New Year's Eve 2019,

Right before everyone sees 2020.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/josefransisco
πŸ“…︎ May 09 2018
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I promise not to make any bad new year's Eve jokes

For the rest of the year

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πŸ‘€︎ u/James75196
πŸ“…︎ Dec 31 2016
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What I'm doing on New Years Eve
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πŸ‘€︎ u/113CandleMagic
πŸ“…︎ Jan 01 2017
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It's New Year's Eve, not New Year's Steve.
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πŸ‘€︎ u/yourfriendbrett
πŸ“…︎ Jan 01 2016
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Making light of an unfortunate New Years Eve situation.

My girlfriend and I are hosting a party when I suddenly start suffering from stomach pain and diarrhea. Feeling crappy, I decide to lay down. My girlfriend comes into the bedroom to see how I'm doing. Looking sad, I tell her I'm sorry for being a party pooper.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/OfRiceAndHen
πŸ“…︎ Jan 01 2016
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New Year's Eve in the NICU

So, not my dad, but my mom's a neonatologist (she works on sick and premature newborns) and she has to work tonight (New Year's Eve).

I jokingly asked if they had a ball drop in the NICU, and to my surprised, she said yes.

"When the testes descend."

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πŸ‘€︎ u/silentxem
πŸ“…︎ Dec 31 2015
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I spent New Year's Eve installing a new toilet...

...in loo of partying.

True story :(

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Shurshacker
πŸ“…︎ Jan 01 2015
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When i came home from party last year new years eve..

The next morning, Dad "Wow havent seen you since last year. Thought you were a gonner!"

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πŸ“…︎ Dec 28 2013
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What do ducks pop on new years eve?

Firequackers

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πŸ‘€︎ u/ifukeenrule
πŸ“…︎ Jan 14 2015
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New Years Eve drunk dad in training

Someone else: "So what are you doing now that you're graduated?" Girl in hot tub: "I work in beer up in Portland." Me: "Do you ever come up for air?"

Nobody got it. I fear my jokes will only be funny once I reproduce.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/nadomars
πŸ“…︎ Jan 02 2014
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