He was taking them for his-panic attacks
Don't ask meow.
I hope you’re happy now.
Well at least I won't be worrying about the possible consequences.
because of hispanic
Where do Cows get their meds?
At the phar-Moo-cy
A Mogolodong.
They say it's gone anti-viral.
Oooooh shiny object
And I'm prescribed Norcos
I look at the bottle and look at my pharmacist and ask, "What did Aquaman do when he was cold?"
Blank stare.
"He put a hydrocodon". Then I shake the bottle.
The groan was real.
He hasn't declared an area of specialization yet but he'd make a mean Proctologist. ☝️
He went from kidneys to kid knees.
Doctor.
Yes, you've caught me I'm not actually a dad but rather a 16 year old female. This is a mess of a story so please bear with me:)
The other day I went downstairs to take my nighttime meds. When I got to the dining room, I saw my dad sitting at the island and he just looked so... sad. I've NEVER seen him like that before but he just seemed so lost and it broke me to see him like that.
My dad always puts on the tough guy act for whatever reason. I doubt he wanted anyone to see him like that so I pretended not to notice. So, I walked over and started chatting with him. We talked about school and video games for a bit until the conversation went a bit dead. However, I had the lovely idea of telling him some dad jokes because those always cheer me up:)
Here are a few of the jokes I told (yes, I did steal them from here haha):
What did the lawyer wear to court?
A lawsuit
-----------
What do you call a romantic vampire?
A necromancer
-----------
Why didn't 4 ask out 5?
Because he was 2²
----------
I told more but I don't remember them off the top of my head.
Those jokes did spark conversation and it made me realize how much I missed having chats with my dad.
After about an hour and a half, I unfortunately had to go to bed as I had school in the morning.
However, since then my dad and I have been regularly having chats:)
They call him Dr. Pepper.
So I told him, "If you want to be a good doctor, you'll need more patients."
Someone had already ripped the appendix out.
I was going to a fencing tournament with my teammates. In our hotel the night before, while unpacking, one of my teammates hit her head on a lamp. Rushing over I asked her if she was ok, or if she was feeling light-headed.
(Don't worry, she was perfectly ok)
The patient looks up before the meds kick in and says: "Doc, lactose intolerant people are gonna hate me when you're done."
It's a waist product.
Police said it was a dead giveaway.
The dean said, "It takes guts to learn anatomy."
Med evil!
to become a sturgeon
Let's go ride bikes!
How that horse became a doctor, I don’t know.
they said, "you don't say!"
Doctor
Six hasn't been the same since he left Vietnam. Every time he closes his eyes, he's sees Charlie hiding in the darkness of the forest. Not that you could ever see those bastards, mind you. They were fast and they knew their way around the jungle. He remembers the looks on the boy's faces when they walked into that village and... oh Jesus. He shouldn't think about that now. Sometimes he still hears Tex's slow southern drawl. He remembers the smell of Brooklyn's cigarettes. He always had a pack of Luckys. But the boys are gone now... he knows that. It's--it's just that he forgets sometimes. And sometimes the way that seven looks at him... it makes him think. Sets him on edge. And he feels like he's back there... In the jungle... In the darkness.
Seven has a hook for a hand as well, which is very scary. Six is afraid of Seven because he is a damn psychopath.
In a room together with my sister and parents after not having seem them for a long time. Sister places her fingers a little under my ear (male) and is explaining to my mom what she has been learning in med school, "This the mandibular angle...".
My dad, also a doctor, then places his fingers on the same place on my sister's face and says, "and this is the womandibular angle". Cue hysterical laughter and me and my dad high fiving each other.
Because books have spines.
Dad sent me this pic today. http://imgur.com/rPiWFfn/
Lovely woman.
Useless surgeon.
At the end of every class when everyone was ready to go, he'd tell us, "Hold on, there's only two more," meaning powerpoint slides. Then he'd pause, act like he'd had an epiphany and declare, "You know, my aunt had a two-more..."
But I could never a-Ford one
In fact, there’s a Vas Deferens.
For example I hate it when engineer students call themself engineers like you don't hear med students calling themself doctors or art students calling themself unemployed.
Don't ask meow
Don’t ask meow.
I hope you're happy!
… I hope you’re happy now!
For example I hate it when engineer students call themself engineers like you don't hear med students calling themself doctors or art students calling themself the next hitler
