To Mark has read
I went to play station 5
My favorite wrapper is the fifty cent piece
The Owl Jizz Era News.
"Ode no!" I thought.
He had a confused Luke on his face.
I said, “Mark, my words!”
He's calling it Wok of Life
And the guy says “how many tattoos I have now”
You told me to stand out from the rest.
I said to the English teacher.
His name is.....
Choo choo Twain!
Today, my son asked "Can I have a book mark?" and I burst into tears. 11 years old and he still doesn't know my name is Brian.
Because they always get lost at C.
Nowadays you'd call him a scorekeeper, but back then he was a tally whacker.
She’s a caring cairn Karen.
She has left a Mark.
I couldn't help but cry... She is 14 and still doesn't know my name is John.
Feefiphobia.
She may not know anything about it yet, but mark my words--the thyme is cumin.
So, she walks over and takes a seat next to him on the bench, turns to him and says, "Sorry to bother you. I know this may be a little forward but I would love to grab coffee with you some time."
Flattered, the man responds, "Sure... but what makes you so certain you and I would get along so well?"
"Well..." the woman says. "A couple things, actually. I noticed you were wearing an Iron Maiden t-shirt. Iron Maiden are my favorite band of all time. When they went on their reunion tour in 1999, my parents took me to see them in Cleveland. I was 12 years old and it was the first concert I ever went to. I absolutely love Iron Maiden."
The man can't believe it.
"I saw them play Cleveland in '99! First concert I ever went to on my own. My best friend Jimmy Spitz and I told our parents we were sleeping at each others' houses, snuck out, took a bus into the city and saw them play at the Plain Dealer Pavillion!"
Naturally, they're both shocked.
"If that isn't weird enough..." says the woman. "I noticed you're reading Mark Twain. I was a communications major in university and I actually wrote my thesis on Mark Twain and how he used satire as a lens to comment on current events of the time, comparing him to satirical news sources of today. He's my favorite author."
Now the man is really taken aback, "Get out of here! I was an English major in university! I specialized in 19th century American literature and this is like my fourth or fifth time reading Tom Sawyer, I absolutely love Mark Twain."
They both can't believe it...this has got to be a match made in heaven.
"Ok..." the woman says. "Well, buckle up because here's the icing on the cake. I noticed you're eating a prune. Prunes are my absolute favorite fruit. When I was a kid, my grandfather lived on a farm. He had an orchard that mainly grew apples and some lemons, but he knew how much my sister and I loved prunes so he kept a couple of plum trees. Every year at the end of the summer, we'd go up and harvest the plums with him. He'd dry them and by the time we'd go back to his place for Thanksgiving he'd always have those prunes saved just for us. They're my favorite fruit! I love prunes, you're eating a prune, this has got to be fate. What do you say?"
The man puts down his fruit and responds,
"It's a date!"
He doesn't know how to feel about it.
... but the scissors cut him off.
Under the sea.
Nice curves!
He’d be Marquis Mark.
I burst into tears. "Billy, please stop reposting the same joke for karma, everyone will hate you."
"Then give me the damn bookmark."
I gave him the bookmark.
He finally won.
Knee on yellow.
To Mark has read
He's calling it Wok of Life
I said, “Mark, my words!”
I said, “Mark, my words!”
11 years old and he still doesn't know my name is Brian.
....and I burst into tears 🤣. 11 years old and he still doesn't know my name is Memphis.
I said, “Mark, my words!”
19 years old and he still does not know my name is Luke
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