Does anyone know puns about cobras?
Because I serpently don't.
I know puns are corny...
..but without them, I'm just a husk of a man.
Need a name for a pet
My friend just got a pet shrew and as everyone knows, pun names for pets are the best but I can't think of any so I need some help
Any suggestions are much appreciated
Art store sparring
Took my wife to the art store to buy a new easel.
Store employee, after carrying out the box: "Well that went easel-y"
Me: "You know, punning is a poor-trait"
dont know if its already been posted but pls this is gold
Did you know that 10+10 and 11+11 are the same thing?
Because 10+10 is twenty and 11+11 is twenty too..
Edit: thank you for awards, I have never gotten one before. I apologize that this is a repost, I did see it on TikTok and thought that it was cute and wanted to share. In the future I will check the sub for similar content before I post anything.
Don't know if this was posted here before
So we all know that you find H2O inside a fire hydrant, but what do you find on the outside of a fire hydrant?
Does anyone know any good sword fighting puns ? I'm trying to think of any words that have..
You can't do this to me. I know my rights!
Did you know that before crowbars were invented...
Crows mostly drank alone.
How do you know a dad jokes is a dad joke?
What kind of bird doesn’t know the words to their own song?
I know a handful of jokes in sign language.
I guarantee no one has ever heard them!
My wife beamed at me and said, “I had no idea our son would go that far!” Tearing up, I stammered, “I know!"
"The trebuchet is amazing! Go get our daughter!"
Lettuce know if you find our dog
I meant to cross post it but I don’t know why I cannot cross post so here is the screenshot version
Dad, do you know why it’s so dark at night?
No sun
EDIT: oh my god 1k upvotes! THIS like, tripled my post karma. You guys are incredible. Much love!
Do you know what propaganda is?
It's when a British person gets a good look at something.
I don't even know how many puns I made here. I am a pun-aholic.
My Dad: Did you know that Mortal Kombat is actually based on an old Scandinavian church song?
Me: Wait, what? Really?
Dad: Yeah, a Finnish Hymn.
I was in the bar last night when the waitress yells "Does anyone know CPR?"
I yelled back "I know all those letters!" Everyone laughed, well except this one guy.
Soup (I know it’s from Instagram but that’s why I kept the @ of the account in)
Two potatoes are standing on the street corner. How do you know which one’s a prostitute?
The one with the stickers that says IDAHO 😂
How did Darth Vader know what Luke had got him for his birthday?
You want to know where dads store all the dad jokes?
They store it in dad-a-base.
Do you guys know the correct term for short people
… or do you also struggle with gnomenclature??
If you play guitar and want to know the secret to making it sound better...
Did you know that Yoda's last name is leheehoo?
Do you know why disembowelment isn't used as a form of execution?
Because semi-colons don't complete a sentence!
Did you know Stephen King has a son named Joe?
I’m not joking, but he is.
Reflecting on Prince Philip death, I was chatting with the Mrs and I said, I know I’m getting a little older, but I never want to live in a vegetative state, dependent on some machine and fluids from a bottle. If that ever happens, just pull the plug.
She got up, unplugged my laptop and threw out my beer….
EDIT: Thanks for the kind awards... My first ever! ❤️
you know what drives old people up the wall?
PLEASE BE CAREFUL! I don’t know if this is a scam or not?
I’ve just received a phone call saying I’ve won £250 or 2 tickets for an Elvis Presley tribute show, then it said just press 1 for the money, 2 for the show.
Has anyone else had this?!
I identify as a man, my birth certificate says I’m a man, everybody I know says I’m a man...
and yet according to Kraft Dinner, I’m a 4-person family
Wanna know a word I just made up?
It used to be free to fill up your car tires with air, now it costs $1.25 You know why?
Did you know Sully js gay? Well, he came out of the closet.
Y’know what really grinds my gears?
Malfunctioning machinery.
My Dad told the family this one yesterday at dinner, "Do you know what the opposite of ladyfinger is? "
We all nodded out heads in No
Dad : "Mentos"
Know why they don't play poker in the jungle?
You’re doomed if you don’t know what “suffix” means
It really is the end of the word
Everyone knows 7 8 9 but why did 7 ate 9?
Because you are supposed to have 3² meals a day.
Did you know that milk is the fastest liquid on earth?
It's pasteurized before you even see it.
Did you know 10+10 and 11+11 are the same
Because 10+10 is 20 and 11+11 is 20 too
Did you know that Mortal Kombat was actually based on an old Scandinavian worship song?
Did you know the Mortal Kombat theme song actually comes from a Scandinavian church song?
How did Darth Vader know what Luke Skywalker got him for X-mas?
Did you know that 10+10 and 11+11 are the same
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