Delighted to say I've finally got a new job installing mirrors!
Nothing fancy, but was something I could always see myself doing.
π︎ 9k
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︎ Apr 24 2021
Does your computer constantly and annoyingly have tons of updates to install?
Of course it does. Software needs to get better over a number of years and you canβt rush the progress.
Chrome wasnβt built in a day!
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︎ May 22 2021
Don't try to "go Inception" with window installment
It's a real pain in the glass!
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︎ Jun 05 2021
This mountain just installed a new CPU and processor into his pc.
It's now running on peak performance
π︎ 8
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︎ Apr 23 2021
A fraudster who installs kitchen worktops for a living got arrested
Police say he was charged with counter fitting
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︎ Apr 21 2021
Once I finally finished installing the thin wood flooring in my large living room, I thought to myself...
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︎ May 06 2021
What was the man who installs granite tops in Kitchens charge with?
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︎ Apr 21 2021
The other day I decided to install a highly decorative wall plug in my living room.
I needed a creative outlet.
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︎ Feb 13 2021
Window installer
Never get in a fight with a window installer
They'll bring the pane!
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︎ Jan 29 2021
The plumber told me I installed the valve on my water softener wrong
I felt completely invalvidated
π︎ 8
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︎ Mar 06 2021
(true story) After having my son install an electric keypad deadbolt on the man door in my garage, my daughter says:
Dad, are you sure that new deadbolt was man-door-tory??
Making daddy proud.
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︎ Jan 26 2021
What is the difference between an art installation and performance art?
Crap on your neighbors doorstep then ring the doorbell - that's an art installation.
Ring the doorbell THEN crap on his doorstep - that's performance art.
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︎ Dec 10 2020
My job installed this new faucet. Im really faucinated by it
π︎ 3
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︎ Sep 16 2020
I asked my grandfather how he was enjoying the new stairlift that was installed in his house.
He said, βItβs driving me up the wall.β
π︎ 8
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︎ Dec 01 2020
I installed a new range hood for an oven
Wife: You need to knock out the vent hole.
Me: I think due to the pandemic, we should wait.
Wife: Why?
Me: The country is low on vent hole laters.
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︎ Nov 16 2020
A man installed on his car new brakes, bearings, crankshaft, tires and exhaust.
He took a break, he couldn't bear it.. he was cranky, tired and exhausted.
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︎ Sep 13 2020
I have fantasised about installing irrigation my whole life
But it's just a pipe dream
π︎ 8
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︎ Jul 28 2020
I asked the nurse giving me my covid vaccine if she moonlights as IT
because she seems really good at installing antivirus!
π︎ 2
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︎ May 16 2021
After the contractor did a poor job installing the moving stairs in our office building my boss threw him down the steps.
π︎ 2
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︎ Sep 10 2020
A cable TV installer walks into a bar and orders a beer.
The bartender says, "You'll be served sometime between 7am and 2pm."
π︎ 49
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︎ Mar 13 2020
Kids grow up so fast
One minute youβre yelling at them for driving you up a wall. The next, youβre begging them to install a Stair-master...
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︎ May 12 2021
The engineer installed a motor too powerfull in the moving stairway
It escalated very quickly.
π︎ 60
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︎ May 11 2020
I had to call tech support for my computer the other day.
Tech Support: βIt seems as though your operating system was installed backwards.β
Me: βSo?β
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︎ Apr 18 2021
I just installed a brand new Luxe bidet
Iβve been having a blast
π︎ 6
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︎ Jul 29 2020
I just installed a screw in my computer.
But I canβt find the driver for it.
π︎ 23
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︎ May 16 2020
Today I got a job installing lightbulbs
π︎ 9
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︎ May 19 2020
Can we uninstall 2020 and re-install it?
π︎ 42
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︎ Mar 25 2020
Can we uninstall 2020 and install it again?
This version has a virus.
π︎ 65
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︎ Mar 29 2020
A German friend of mine actually installed a bath around his desk !?..
π︎ 6
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︎ Jul 07 2020
Ever since I installed Adblocker, I have been severely depressed.
Hot singles in my area are no longer interested in me.
π︎ 5k
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︎ May 06 2018
My buddy just installed a new counter top
I just hope he doesnβt take it for granite
π︎ 13
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︎ Mar 14 2020
I finally got work installing wooden window blinds...
I SHUTTER when I think where Iβd be without this job.
π︎ 5
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︎ Jan 19 2020
I was arrested for using cash that my friend gave me after I installed a new table top in his kitchen.
He gave me counter fit money.
π︎ 7
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︎ May 27 2020
What do you call a black lady that installs and changes catheters?
π︎ 5
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︎ Jun 04 2020
You can order bathroom fixtures online and have someone at you door in a couple days ready to install it,
π︎ 5
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︎ May 25 2020
Iβve just installed high voltage electrical fencing .....
My neighbour is dead against it.
π︎ 9
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︎ Jan 18 2020
My job installing air ducts is very frustrating...
thank goodness I get to VENT a lot.
π︎ 4
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︎ Jan 16 2020
I'm getting fibre installed on Saturday.
It'll be nice to finally have regular internet.
π︎ 3
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︎ Apr 22 2020
I used to install windows.
It was a real pane.
(Credit to my partner Michael for all of my r/dadjokes entries).
π︎ 32
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︎ Jan 01 2020
My dog initially barked when the people installing my shingles started then barked again as they finished...
Re-roofing complete.
*Edit: reworded punchline. I think it might be better said "replacing my shingles" but I cannot for the life of me edit that part...
*ahem* without hacking.
π︎ 10
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︎ Jan 22 2020
Just installed a new hydration system
π︎ 4
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︎ Jan 02 2020
I asked my grandfather how heβs enjoying the new stair lift that was recently installed in his house.
He said, βI hate it. Itβs driving me up the wall.β
π︎ 68
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︎ Aug 07 2020
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