What do you call a happy cowboy?
Happy St.Patty's, Punsters!
I came home really drunk last night and my wife wasn’t happy at all. “How much have you had to drink?” she asked sternly, staring at me. “Nothing” I slurred. “Look at me!” she shouted. “It’s either me or the pub, which one is it?”
I paused for a second while I thought and mumbled, “It’s you. I can tell by the voice.”
My husband and I were blissfully happy for 25 years
Happy Easter or Happy Wester?
My wife and I just celebrated 10 years of happy marriage...
It was coincidentally our 30th wedding anniversary.
From my 5yo: What does a happy shark say?
I made this She's got of lumps and bumps but I'm overall happy she's finnished kings, queens, and non-binary beans I present to you, my Les-bee-ian 😂🐝❤️🧡🤍💗
I had a happy childhood. My dad used to put me in tires and roll me down hills
When I met my childhood bully last Friday, I was happy to learn he had double vision, because he always bullied me with my glasses. But then...
The day I turned 42, my daughter walked up to me and said "happy...", and started timing on her watch. After a long silence she said...
"...40 second birthday".
I was so proud.
If the winner of a competition cries happy tears, what does the runner up cry?
Why was the man at the barbecue so happy?
He met the grill of his dreams
Happy administrator noise
I named my dog "Happy New Year"
when I call him in every night, the neighbors think I've lost my mind
Happy Parade Day! March Fourth!
My wife was not happy with the new mattress I bought for us and wanted to return it asap
I asked her to sleep on it and decide tomorrow.
Yoga people never seem to be happy...
They're always bent out if shape.
What do cats eat when they're happy?
My son's a happy boy... I recently persuaded him to swallow a flashlight...
...you should have seen his face light up.
What do you mean, marsupials are happy?
Yeah man, they are joeyfull!
There are some people who are happy,
Happy Ending
A guy walks into a bar on Ash Wednesday and orders a beer. "I'm really having a hard time trying to decide what to give up for Lent," he tells the bartender. "Well let me tell you a little cautionary tale about giving things up for Lent," the bartender says. "A particular family in LA has been abstaining from using one letter of the alphabet for Lent each year, since 2001. It started as a joke, giving up "A" in 2001 and "B" in 2002, but developed into a strong family tradition. This year, one of the members has a tough choice to make. Unlike the rest of the Astleys, Rick made a solemn vow... "
What's a happy cat's favorite color?
My wife tested my knowledge of common household herbs, and I’m happy to say I got 4 out of 5 right.
Which eye doctor makes you happy?
Happy Lunar New Year 2021
Hopefully good health and prosperity aren't too much to "ox" for.
What do search engines say when they're happy ?
Happy Leonardo Di’Crabrio day continued
Happy Leonardo Di’Crabrio day
Q: Why was the church happy when the man lost his leg in an explosion?
A: Because he was a blast-femur.
Happy New Year fellow dad jokesters! For 2021, I’m going to turn all of my problems into opportunities.
Starting with my severe drinking opportunity
Seven dwarves were all in bed, feeling Happy.
When Happy got out, they all felt Grumpy !!
Happy Ballet Day!
It's 2/2. Plie have a good one!
My friend wasn't happy with his new car, so I said "Dude, just roll with it".
"A happy man is one who has found meaning in life"
Say "Happy Hole-y Days" instead of "Happy Groundhog day"
So that you include other later winter hole-based celebrations.
Happy Birthday Beethoven
In honor of Ludwig von Beethoven's 250th birthday ...
What is Beethoven doing to celebrate his 250th birthday?
He's decomposing!
Why was the man at the cookout so happy?
He met the grill of his dreams.
I'm not happy.
Really, which dwarf are you, then?
You know, I had such a happy childhood. My dad used to put me in tyres and roll me down the hill.
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