Graveled Puns

But it was his own dumb asphalt...

I'd always heard adults talk about it, but I finally knew what they were talking about.

I'll never forget the pain of my first kid knee stones...

I am fine.

For a moment, I thought he was gone with the Schwinn.

It was of great sedimentary value.

You start feeling like gravel.

It was pretty rough

On the night walk with our 2 pups. One is obsessed with toads and every item on the road is suspiciously inspected. Frequently a leaf is sniffed and nosed to encourage a leap. Tonight, a piece of gravel caught her eye with exuberant tailnub wagging! “Oh pupper that isn’t sedentary; it’s sedimentary.”

Hope you like it too.

It's a bad hobbit.

Family just finished eating, and my father and I stepped outside. We noticed some ice cream spilled on the rough gravel of the parking lot.

Dad: what flavor does that look like to you?

Me: I don't know. Maybe mint?

Dad: I was thinking rocky road.

She was talking about how she needed the measurements of the driveway so that she would know how much gravel she needed.

She turns towards me and asks me in the middle of her ramblings "How many feet are in a yard?"

Without missing a beat I reply "Two if you're standing in it."

He says it feels like he has gravel under his eyes. My stepmom asked if he still had the drops his doctor gave him and he got confused not knowing what she was talking about. She told him: "Go look in your drawers". My dad looked shocked and said with a drawl, "They wouldn't be in my drawers!"

I was loading up some gravel into wheel barrows to be dumped in the back yard. My neighbor rolls up in his baby blue Nissan Leaf and gets out. He takes one look at me and says "Your rockin' out."

But it was his dumb asphalt

But it was his dumb asphalt

But it was his dumb asphalt…

But it was his dumb asphalt…

It is of great sedimentary value.

But it was his dumb asphalt...

But it was his dumb asphalt...