My wife told me to stop eating Christmas leftovers out the fridge

But I just canโ€™t quit cold turkey

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/alwaysthecold
๐Ÿ“…︎ Dec 27 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
Always knock on the fridge before opening.

Just in case there is a salad dressing

๐Ÿ‘︎ 80
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/I_SHIT_A_BRICK
๐Ÿ“…︎ Jan 12
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If you download something illegally on a samsung smart fridge

Is that copyright infridgement?

๐Ÿ‘︎ 241
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/Demarcus-Xavier
๐Ÿ“…︎ Dec 19 2020
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You should always knock on the fridge door before opening it

Just in case there's a salad dressing

๐Ÿ‘︎ 35
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/DubstepAndTrap
๐Ÿ“…︎ Jan 08
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
I normally knock on the fridge door before I open it...

Just in case thereโ€™s a salad dressing

๐Ÿ‘︎ 15k
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/omniwrench-
๐Ÿ“…︎ Aug 29 2020
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Cleaning out my fridge when...

I came across two containers of butter. I guess you could say it was a second-dairy

๐Ÿ‘︎ 6
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/DJsmurfySmurf
๐Ÿ“…︎ Jan 03
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I am a proud dad today - my son ask me what this Indian bread on top of the fridge is for

I told him itโ€™s Naan of his business

Edit: he could have replied โ€œpapa dumbโ€

๐Ÿ‘︎ 39
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/PLUMBUM2
๐Ÿ“…︎ Dec 01 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
I always knock on the fridge before I open the door...

Just in case there is a salad dressing.

I'll see myself out....

๐Ÿ‘︎ 63
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/thirteen_20
๐Ÿ“…︎ Dec 04 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
What did the bottle of ranch say when the man opened the fridge door?

"Don't look! I'm dressing!"

๐Ÿ‘︎ 8
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/jonnyprophet
๐Ÿ“…︎ Dec 06 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
Wife dropped a jar of pickles upon opening the fridge; glass and pickle juice went all over the kitchen floor.

My 10 year old son: Don't worry, it's not a big dill. My wife while looking at me: -.-

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/ProfessorPeterr
๐Ÿ“…︎ Oct 21 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
I overcame my addiction to eating Thanksgiving leftovers directly out of the fridge.

I didn't use the 12 steps, I quit cold turkey.

๐Ÿ‘︎ 14
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/spitmonkeyx
๐Ÿ“…︎ Nov 28 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
I normally knock on the fridge door before I open it...

Just in case there's a salad dressing

๐Ÿ‘︎ 211
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/laserspewpew_
๐Ÿ“…︎ Sep 19 2020
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For my wife's birthday I bought her a beautiful fridge freezer....

I know it isn't much, but you should have seen her face light up when she opened it.

๐Ÿ‘︎ 24
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/VERBERD
๐Ÿ“…︎ Nov 05 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
I used to be addicted to eating Thanksgiving leftovers straight out of the fridge

But then I quit cold turkey.

๐Ÿ‘︎ 6
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/SayLittleDoMuch
๐Ÿ“…︎ Nov 26 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
My wife left a note on the fridge, saying, "This isn't working. Goodbye."

I opened it and it works fine.

๐Ÿ‘︎ 21
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/Brucemoose1
๐Ÿ“…︎ Oct 02 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
My girlfriend left a note on my fridge this morning saying "this isn't working, bye"

I opened it up and it was working fine, so I'll just wait till she's home to ask her what she meant.

๐Ÿ‘︎ 92
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/youthfulcomrade
๐Ÿ“…︎ Sep 18 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
Why should you always knock on the fridge before opening it?

There could be a salad dressing.

๐Ÿ‘︎ 11
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/pikachu_555-1
๐Ÿ“…︎ Sep 14 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
For my wife's birthday I bought her the fancy new fridge that she wanted.

You should have seen her face light up when she opened it

๐Ÿ‘︎ 9
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/bishslap
๐Ÿ“…︎ Oct 20 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
What veggie should you avoid buying if your fridge is tiny?

Don't buy any kind of fungi. They take up too mushroom.

๐Ÿ‘︎ 231
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/DrobeOfWar
๐Ÿ“…︎ Aug 04 2020
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My fridge stopped working...

Its not cool.

๐Ÿ‘︎ 14
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/ClingyToaster
๐Ÿ“…︎ Aug 30 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
My wife left a note on the fridge that said, โ€œItโ€™s not working. I canโ€™t take it any more. Iโ€™m going to my momโ€™s.โ€

I opened the fridge door, the light came on, the beer was cold. What the hell did she mean?

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/madazzahatter
๐Ÿ“…︎ Jun 19 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
I always knock when I open the fridge

Just in case there's a salad dressing.

๐Ÿ‘︎ 156
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/ShimuDono
๐Ÿ“…︎ Jul 23 2020
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I feel uncomfortable next to my fridge

It's way too cool for me

๐Ÿ‘︎ 11
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/joshua_bobney
๐Ÿ“…︎ Sep 11 2020
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I'm going to buy my son a fridge for Christmas...

I can't wait to see his little face light up when he opens the door!

๐Ÿ‘︎ 19
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/denandbil
๐Ÿ“…︎ Sep 14 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
I always knock on the fridge door before opening it...

there might be a salad dressing.

๐Ÿ‘︎ 19
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/gabriel_osi
๐Ÿ“…︎ Aug 25 2020
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It's amazing..to use the fridge at my work, you don't even need an appointment!

It's a Walk-In!

๐Ÿ‘︎ 6
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/thoxis1
๐Ÿ“…︎ Sep 21 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
I bought my son a fridge for Christmas.

Can't wait to see his face light up, when he opens it.

๐Ÿ‘︎ 7k
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/simplyGagi
๐Ÿ“…︎ Dec 24 2019
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
I always knock on the fridge before I open it

Just in case thereโ€™s a salad dressing

๐Ÿ‘︎ 9k
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/oasishippie
๐Ÿ“…︎ Nov 26 2019
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
I always knock on the fridge before opening it

Just in case thereโ€™s a salad dressing

๐Ÿ‘︎ 33
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/dgpx89
๐Ÿ“…︎ Jul 15 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
One of my kids ate a magnetic number off the fridge; it was the one between 1 and 3.

The doc said they would be ok โ€œThis two shall pass.โ€

๐Ÿ‘︎ 3
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/DinglebarryHandpump
๐Ÿ“…︎ Aug 22 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
Why donโ€™t we ever have olives in our fridge?

Because I always eat olive them

๐Ÿ‘︎ 16
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/LookAtMeImAName
๐Ÿ“…︎ Aug 01 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
Why do you always know ask on the fridge before opening it?

Just in case there is a salad dressing.

๐Ÿ‘︎ 6
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/ankitk2909
๐Ÿ“…︎ Jun 23 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
I put a new shelf towards the top of my fridge

The steaks have never been higher

๐Ÿ‘︎ 6
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๐Ÿ“…︎ Jun 20 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
My dad told me to look in the fridge and check out the milk that went bad
๐Ÿ‘︎ 2
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/sudomakemesomefood
๐Ÿ“…︎ Jul 21 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
I just bought a fridge...

It's so cool.

๐Ÿ‘︎ 8
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/TheRealStickBoi
๐Ÿ“…︎ Jun 27 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
I found one hard boiled egg in the fridge

It was the last one in the container. I took one bite and spit it out - no idea how long it had been there but clearly it had been too long.

"Rotten egg?" my husband asks. I agree. He says "Makes sense, it was the last one there."

๐Ÿ‘︎ 13
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/Vampilton
๐Ÿ“…︎ Apr 26 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
I always knock on the fridge door before opening it.
๐Ÿ‘︎ 5k
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/ILooveMangoes
๐Ÿ“…︎ Feb 25 2019
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
I used to hate the lockdown in the beginning, but now that I have a full fridge, I am ok with it.

Scientists are calling it the Stock Home syndrome.

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/porichoygupto
๐Ÿ“…︎ May 31 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
What did the bottle of ranch say when the man opened the fridge door?

"Don't look! I'm dressing!"

๐Ÿ‘︎ 7
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/jonnyprophet
๐Ÿ“…︎ Dec 06 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
I Always Knock On The Fridge Door Before Opening It...

Just in case there's a salad dressing.

๐Ÿ‘︎ 96
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/Upsidedownsquidhead
๐Ÿ“…︎ Jul 18 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
I always knock on the fridge before opening it

Just in case there is a salad dressing.

๐Ÿ‘︎ 16
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/cris0613
๐Ÿ“…︎ Sep 16 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
I always knock on the fridge door before opening it

Just in case there's a salad dressing.

๐Ÿ‘︎ 29
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/araitisaname
๐Ÿ“…︎ Sep 08 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
I always knock before opening the fridge

Just in case there is a salad dressing

๐Ÿ‘︎ 26
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/Wornsy21
๐Ÿ“…︎ Aug 05 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
I always knock on my fridge before opening the door

Just in case there's a salad dressing

๐Ÿ‘︎ 22
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/teletubbiehubbie
๐Ÿ“…︎ Jun 26 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
I always knock on the fridge door before opening it

Just in case there's a salad dressing.

๐Ÿ‘︎ 10
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/_beatnik_
๐Ÿ“…︎ Jul 17 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report

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