My brother, who’s a cowboy, always sits on the stove when he visits us.

He says that it makes him feel more at home... on the range.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/legendary-jake
πŸ“…︎ Nov 16 2020
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My mum asked me to watch the stove while she went to the bathroom. She was so angry when she got back...

Things really boiled over

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Persons1001
πŸ“…︎ Aug 03 2020
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I rewired the electric stove today, and my wife was overjoyed...

She spent all afternoon holding onto it and dancing with happiness.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/AlRedux
πŸ“…︎ Jul 23 2020
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Why can’t you cook wood on the stove?

Because it’s a non-stick pan...

πŸ‘︎ 17
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πŸ‘€︎ u/d__n__a
πŸ“…︎ May 08 2020
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Why couldn't I fry wood on the stove?

I used a non-stick pan.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Dead---inside
πŸ“…︎ Apr 22 2020
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Why does the new iPhone 11 Max look like a stove top?

Because Tim cooks

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πŸ‘€︎ u/rickcinbigd
πŸ“…︎ Sep 24 2019
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My pork belly on the stove caught on fire and my wife put it out.

She really saved my bacon.

πŸ‘︎ 11
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Burninator1
πŸ“…︎ Sep 05 2019
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Why can't you try wood on the stove?

Because it's a non stick pan

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Gamertron20000
πŸ“…︎ Dec 31 2018
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Something is odd about my hot stove.

I just can't quite put my finger on it.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/maxkostka
πŸ“…︎ Sep 03 2018
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My wife always leaves the fan above the stove on.

Every day, I'm the one who ends up getting up and turning it off.

It's exhausting.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/metroidfan220
πŸ“…︎ Jun 02 2019
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I was shopping for a stove last night,

They had a range of options.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/weggy2015
πŸ“…︎ Feb 16 2018
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What are refrigerator’s opinions about stoves?

There’s a range.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/HeebyBeejees
πŸ“…︎ May 17 2018
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My dad argued with a stove

The conversation really started to heat up

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πŸ‘€︎ u/izanomel
πŸ“…︎ Oct 30 2018
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One day I'll open up a store that only sells stoves.

I'll have a range of hot products.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/kristhebrown
πŸ“…︎ May 28 2018
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How did Blackbeard light his stove?

With the pirate light.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Theageofpisces
πŸ“…︎ Sep 19 2018
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I've used to be lousy at getting my crock-pot off the stove.

But I've got a handle on it now.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/eltegs
πŸ“…︎ Jan 10 2018
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I cannot trust my stove top.

Because I don’t trust the look in its eyes.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/One_Name
πŸ“…︎ Jun 17 2018
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Wife left the Jiffy Pop on the stove too long at 12am...

She was burning the midnight foil.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/teeim
πŸ“…︎ Apr 25 2018
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If you ever want to open your own business, I recommend selling stoves...

You'll immediately offer a range of hot products.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Godzilla_KOM
πŸ“…︎ Oct 24 2017
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My dad and I by our coal stove

Me: (taking a look at the thermometer on our stove)

Dad: What are you looking at?

Me: This thermometer for the stove. Its so old, does it still work?

Dad: Yeah, to a degree.

Needless to say, hysterical laughter ensued.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/SyracuseOrange12
πŸ“…︎ Jan 08 2014
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Stove was ticking...

Me: What is that DAMN ticking noise?!?

Dad: Ha ha... that ticking you off? HAHAHAHA

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/quwertie
πŸ“…︎ Sep 29 2013
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