Why is it a bad idea to iron a four leaf clover?

Because you shouldn't press your luck!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/GoodChadAndUgly
πŸ“…︎ Mar 17 2021
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What do you call a Jedi with four eyes?

Jediiii

πŸ‘︎ 783
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πŸ‘€︎ u/mommypanda35
πŸ“…︎ Apr 13 2021
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I tried to explain to my four-year-old son that it’s perfectly normal to accidentally poop in your pants, but he’s not buying it. In fact...

He’s still making fun of me...

πŸ‘︎ 86
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πŸ‘€︎ u/honolulu_oahu_mod
πŸ“…︎ Apr 03 2021
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What has four legs and goes β€œoom, oom”?

A cow walking backwards

πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/pathrado
πŸ“…︎ May 10 2021
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What do you get when you mix a four-leaf clover with poison ivy?

A rash of good luck.

πŸ‘︎ 10
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πŸ‘€︎ u/jigsatics
πŸ“…︎ May 05 2021
🚨︎ report
TIL: Humans are born with four kidneys

When they grow up, two of them becomes adult knees

πŸ‘︎ 1k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Not_obnoxious
πŸ“…︎ Jan 26 2021
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Fell in love with a girl who only knew four vowels

She never knew I existed

πŸ‘︎ 69
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πŸ‘€︎ u/shiva8512
πŸ“…︎ Mar 29 2021
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Which rock group has four members and doesn't sing?

Mt. Rushmore

πŸ‘︎ 176
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πŸ‘€︎ u/choisays
πŸ“…︎ Mar 03 2021
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What does a four-wheeled vehicle and a television have in common?

They’re both ATV

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/pllarsen
πŸ“…︎ Apr 23 2021
🚨︎ report
Was playing a game of yahtzee, rolled four 2s

It was very fortuitous.

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πŸ“…︎ Apr 26 2021
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I said I was sad to have to go back to work on Monday after a long break. My four year old without missing a beat said...

Daddy, you're sad because it's SADurday.

I was so proud.

πŸ‘︎ 575
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πŸ‘€︎ u/1kings2214
πŸ“…︎ Jan 02 2021
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Why did the clock go back four seconds?

Because it was hungry

πŸ‘︎ 47
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πŸ‘€︎ u/xIR0NPULSE
πŸ“…︎ Feb 23 2021
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I saw a picture of a dog that had four prosthetic legs.

He has faux paws.

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Mr_PoodlePants
πŸ“…︎ Mar 19 2021
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I painted a four leaf clover on my wife's foam stones ...

Because they are SHAM-rocks!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/scottclarkk7
πŸ“…︎ Mar 26 2021
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In Ancient Rome, there were four types of poisons. Poisons I, II, and III would kill you instantly.

Poison IV would just make you kinda itchy

πŸ‘︎ 59
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πŸ‘€︎ u/mr_iguano_man
πŸ“…︎ Feb 07 2021
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The Texas state Aquarium taught a crow to play connect four, too bad they didn't teach it Clue...

I bet it would murder the game.

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/RufusMoray
πŸ“…︎ Mar 17 2021
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Three guys are on a boat with four cigarettes but no matches or lighter. What do they do?

They throw a cigarette overboard and the boat becomes a cigarette lighter.

πŸ‘︎ 31
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πŸ‘€︎ u/sarcasmwala
πŸ“…︎ Feb 22 2021
🚨︎ report
What has four letters?

That’s all. I was just letting you know.

πŸ‘︎ 62
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πŸ‘€︎ u/metapede
πŸ“…︎ Dec 15 2020
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Every summer I get bit by one thousand and twenty four bugs.

My wife told me to get over it cause it was just one byte.

πŸ‘︎ 24
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ChaosDragoon89
πŸ“…︎ Jan 02 2021
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Four Taurus
πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/EcuadorDabs710
πŸ“…︎ Dec 27 2020
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"Length times width times height. Pi times r-squared times h. Four-thirds times pi times r-cubed."

This really speaks volumes.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/JoeFas
πŸ“…︎ Feb 08 2021
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What four elements are you not allowed to bring to your job?

Nitrogen, sulfur, Fluorine, and tungsten, cause they are NSFW.

πŸ‘︎ 128
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πŸ‘€︎ u/wileydan
πŸ“…︎ Nov 19 2020
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What has four eyes and a peepee?

>!Mississippi.!<

This joke doesn't work as well in writing.

πŸ‘︎ 11
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ayitsfreddy
πŸ“…︎ Jan 23 2021
🚨︎ report
Authorities are searching for a four-foot tall woman who recently escaped from prison in upstate New York. She was serving a five year sentence for fraud after convincing a number of victims that she was a powerful psychic.

Now she's a small medium at large.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/eggsaladapologist
πŸ“…︎ Nov 25 2020
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What do you call a fish with four eyes?

Fiiiish!

πŸ‘︎ 26
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πŸ‘€︎ u/KnightHawk37
πŸ“…︎ Dec 12 2020
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What do you call four bullfighters standing in quicksand?

Quattro Sinko

πŸ‘︎ 34
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Said_It_in_Reddit
πŸ“…︎ Jan 13 2021
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The twelve days of Jokemas, day four

Want to hear a chimney joke?

I got stacks of them, first one's on the house

πŸ‘︎ 12
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Hud_is_on
πŸ“…︎ Dec 16 2020
🚨︎ report
My four year old has been learning Spanish for a year, and he still can’t say β€˜please’

I think that’s poor for four

πŸ‘︎ 178
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Oobedoo321
πŸ“…︎ Dec 19 2020
🚨︎ report
One bucket, two bucketth, three bucketth, four bucketth...

Sorry, it’s my bucket lisp

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πŸ‘€︎ u/AlexOfTheEarth
πŸ“…︎ Dec 01 2020
🚨︎ report
An man at a bar didn’t want his wife to know he was out all night. But he was so drunk he couldn’t even stand and had to crawl all the way back home on all fours.

He got home he reached up for the door knob and opened the door, crawled upstairs and into his bed with his wife. His wife in the morning said β€œWhy were you out all night?” He said β€œHow did you find out?”

She said β€œThe bar called. They said you left your wheelchair again”.

πŸ‘︎ 12
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πŸ‘€︎ u/MeGoHungaBunga
πŸ“…︎ Dec 26 2020
🚨︎ report
My four year old son threw his ball that landed on my laptop keyboard while I was typing

And said β€œI guess the ball is working today!”. His first real joke. I’m so proud!

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Jeresil
πŸ“…︎ Jan 08 2021
🚨︎ report
I saw a drunk dude riding in a boat on the chests of four women with average bust size, one of whom had a single mastectomy.

He was sailing on the seven C’s

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/serialcompliment
πŸ“…︎ Dec 09 2020
🚨︎ report
Called my local restaurant for reservation. Hey are you guys open for reservations? They replied four to nine today

Looks like they are too busy today

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πŸ‘€︎ u/randombot777
πŸ“…︎ Jan 06 2021
🚨︎ report
Who was the only celebrity with four body parts in his name?

Tony Hancock

πŸ‘︎ 14
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πŸ‘€︎ u/BitcoinBanker
πŸ“…︎ Nov 26 2020
🚨︎ report
Four Seasons Total Lawn Care created some good ones after the bizarre press conference Saturday such as "Lawn and Order" and "Make America Rake Again" - I don't see them using this one on their promotional materials though:
πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/danarchist
πŸ“…︎ Nov 09 2020
🚨︎ report
My four year old: Daddy, what is Alexa scared of?

Me: She's just a robot, I don't think she ever feels fear.

My son: She's scared of getting Alexa-cuted.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/TalornCeleron
πŸ“…︎ Jul 29 2020
🚨︎ report
I found the first four Harry Potter books to be quite light hearted.

The fifth one was dead sirius.

πŸ‘︎ 10k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Nov 08 2019
🚨︎ report
TIL: Humans are born with four kidneys

When they grow up, two of them becomes adult knees

πŸ‘︎ 17k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Not_obnoxious
πŸ“…︎ Sep 24 2020
🚨︎ report
What rock group has four men that don't sing?

Mount Rushmore.

πŸ‘︎ 49
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πŸ‘€︎ u/warpuffed
πŸ“…︎ Feb 14 2021
🚨︎ report
Never iron your four leaf clover.

You don't want to press your luck.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Flyman68
πŸ“…︎ Mar 17 2021
🚨︎ report
What Rock Group has four men that don't sing?

Mount Rushmore.

πŸ‘︎ 77
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Thewhittaker506
πŸ“…︎ Feb 02 2021
🚨︎ report
What do you get when you cross poison ivy and a four leaf clover?

A rash of good luck! πŸ€

πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Rivethart
πŸ“…︎ Mar 14 2021
🚨︎ report
What rock group has only four members and none of them sing?

Mount Rushmore

πŸ‘︎ 9k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/andersonfmly
πŸ“…︎ Aug 21 2020
🚨︎ report
In ancient Rome there were four different types of poison...

Poisons I, II, and III were deadly...

Poison IV just made you itchy.

πŸ‘︎ 38
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Hicks4183
πŸ“…︎ Feb 10 2021
🚨︎ report
What rock group has four men that don't sing?

Mount Rushmore.

πŸ‘︎ 566
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Odinnextgen
πŸ“…︎ Oct 24 2020
🚨︎ report
What rock group has four men that don't sing?

Mount Rushmore.

πŸ‘︎ 81
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πŸ‘€︎ u/rtedith
πŸ“…︎ Nov 06 2020
🚨︎ report
My four year old has been learning Spanish and still can’t say the word please.

Which I think is poor for four.

πŸ‘︎ 26
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πŸ‘€︎ u/justbeatitTTD
πŸ“…︎ Oct 23 2020
🚨︎ report

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