Let the puns flow through you
πŸ‘οΈŽ 5
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/sly_teddy_bear
πŸ“…οΈŽ Dec 11 2020
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A pun that really flows off the tongue
πŸ‘οΈŽ 34
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/sandbag747
πŸ“…οΈŽ Oct 03 2020
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What a flow!

Egypt has sent a warning to Ethiopia not to block the Nile, but really, Ethiopia doesn't give a dam about it

πŸ‘οΈŽ 2
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Dark_Leome
πŸ“…οΈŽ Oct 23 2020
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Where do you go if you want to stop a water flow by wedging in hundreds of small furry animals?

Hamster dam

πŸ‘οΈŽ 9
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Octopus-Pawn
πŸ“…οΈŽ Mar 03 2020
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If I fell into the river that flows through Paris...

...am I legally in Seine?

πŸ‘οΈŽ 9
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Rocknocker
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 13 2020
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What do you call a sea creature with flow?

An Eminemone

πŸ‘οΈŽ 2
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Frobi-Wan
πŸ“…οΈŽ Nov 19 2019
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In which state does nile river flow?

Liquid

πŸ‘οΈŽ 17
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/mikekhan7
πŸ“…οΈŽ Aug 13 2019
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Just go with the flow (xpost /r/gifs )( Ν‘Β° ΝœΚ– Ν‘Β°)
πŸ‘οΈŽ 3
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/hellABunk
πŸ“…οΈŽ Apr 30 2016
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There have been a lot of stories about volcanic eruptions and lava flows in the news lately...

They're so hot right now.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 2
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Verisai
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jun 04 2018
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As a traffic planner I was asked how and where I intended to improve flow through intersections. I pointed on the map and said,

"Roundabout here."

πŸ‘οΈŽ 63
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Onegodoneloveoneway
πŸ“…οΈŽ Apr 30 2017
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If you stay in the area where the longest Afican river flows into the Mediterranean, you will go crazy.

Sea Nile

πŸ‘οΈŽ 7
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/redditurded
πŸ“…οΈŽ Oct 19 2016
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My said she wanted to be seen in something long and flowing.

So i t pushed her in to the river!

πŸ‘οΈŽ 6
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/tiger7971
πŸ“…οΈŽ Sep 29 2020
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Did you know you can hear blood flowing close to the skin?

You just have to listen varicosely.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 48
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/OriginalCWP
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jul 25 2020
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My friend couldn't afford to pay his water bill

So I sent him a "get well soon" card

πŸ‘οΈŽ 15k
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/RedCakesYT
πŸ“…οΈŽ Sep 07 2020
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I'll stick to my ribs

A woman walked into the kitchen one day and saw, much to her horror, her husband sitting at the table with blood all over most of his face, his chest, hands, arm, and on the table. She watched for a moment, shocked, as he began pouring barbeque sauce on his arm where most of the blood was coming from.

"Stop that! What are you doing!? What happened to your arm?!" She finally managed to scream as she unjammed all the words trying to flow out at once.

Her husband looked at her with a disgusted frown and a shake of his head and replied "I've made a terrible me-steak"

πŸ‘οΈŽ 4
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/dazmo
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 12 2021
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The fountain of youth…

…flows into the Juve-Nile.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 11
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/DENelson83
πŸ“…οΈŽ Dec 30 2020
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I went to dinner with a cannibal family I know. The conversation was flowing. Their daughter suddenly piped up β€œMummy I don’t like Nanny”. The mother replied...

β€œWell leave her on the side and just eat your vegetables”.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 10
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/cwwspurs
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 24 2020
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As I stared at the hot water flowing towards my shower drain I realized something.

It's all downhill from here.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 3
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/JoeFas
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 29 2020
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What's a flowing water with living organisms called?

A livestream.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 34
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/nexxus25
πŸ“…οΈŽ Oct 27 2019
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Diarrhea is hereditary.

It runs in your jeans.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 24
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Baldeagle77
πŸ“…οΈŽ Aug 22 2020
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My hair flowed down my back when I was in my 20’s and I’m not bragging when I tell you it still does

Because it starts from below my collar now

πŸ‘οΈŽ 6
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Irv-Elephant
πŸ“…οΈŽ May 12 2019
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I was upset in front of my geography teacher because I couldn't find a stream of water that flowed into the Sea of Azol

He said "Crimea River."

πŸ‘οΈŽ 4
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/HisNameIsRatatouille
πŸ“…οΈŽ Apr 02 2019
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Did you see the movie about the invention of tampons?

Yeah, it's a period piece.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 24
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/CAD8033
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jul 02 2020
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The Monk and The Cow

A monk sits at the peak of a hill that overlooks where the grassy Earth meets a river, the river flows with a breeze, and the breeze explores a mountain range, and the mountains neighbor the sky, and the sky conceals the entire universe, hiding the unknown in plain sight. The monk exhales "Ooooomm". He repeats this until a noise, very faint, breaks his chant.

"moo."

The monk stops for a moment but, without changing his position, dismisses it. "Ooooooommm." He begins again.

He's interrupted again, "moooo."

The monk turns to find a cow looking up at him from the bottom of the hill. "Kind cow," the monk says, "please do not interrupt my meditation."

The cow stares blankly back at the monk. The monk sighs and continues.

"Oooooommmm-"

Even louder, "Mmmooooooooo."

"Dear cow, I must reach enlightenment. Please, refrain from making your cow noises or find another hill."

The monk continues again, "Oooooooommmm-"

"MMMmmoooooooooooO!" The cow exclaims.

The monk stands up angrily, "Cow! Why must you interrupt my chanting?"

The cow replies, "Because you're saying it backwards!"

πŸ‘οΈŽ 9
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/baconbuddy95
πŸ“…οΈŽ Oct 09 2020
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I asked my wife β€œWhat’s it like having to deal with periods?”

She said β€œI just go with the flow”.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 8
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/sarcasticpremed
πŸ“…οΈŽ Aug 30 2020
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My wife made a graph to track her periods.

It's a flow chart.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 15
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/hybridtheory1331
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jul 30 2020
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Eating apples is healthy
πŸ‘οΈŽ 3k
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/normalperson4382
πŸ“…οΈŽ May 18 2019
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Masturbation is the best way to get your creative juices flowing.

That's why they call it a "stroke of genius" when you finally come up with something

πŸ‘οΈŽ 13
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/BuddyEndsleigh
πŸ“…οΈŽ Oct 25 2016
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My sword doesn’t weigh much

It’s my light saber

πŸ‘οΈŽ 85
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/piginafez
πŸ“…οΈŽ Dec 26 2019
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My wife is on her period

I told her β€œjust go with the flow.”

πŸ‘οΈŽ 2
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/sarcasticpremed
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jul 27 2020
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Before my surgery, the anesthetist offered to knock me out with gas or a boat paddle.

It was an ether/oar situation

πŸ‘οΈŽ 852
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Degtyrev
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jun 03 2019
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Studies show that 4 out of 5 men suffer from diarrhea at some point in their life.

Why are 1 out of 5 men enjoying it??

πŸ‘οΈŽ 7k
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…οΈŽ Mar 06 2018
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What do the people say about the female rapper on her menstrual cycle?

She had a mean flow

πŸ‘οΈŽ 30
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/BadBooJuJu66
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 31 2020
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Therapy

A psychiatrist asked his patient if he could remember one life changing moment that really stood out from any others.

He replied. "Why yes. I remember it like it was yesterday. I was running down the street with tears flowing from my eyes crying 'Its a boy, its a boy!' I made a concious decision that day to never visit another brothel in Thailand".

πŸ‘οΈŽ 5
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/hayeshilton
πŸ“…οΈŽ Mar 26 2020
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I went to the hardware store and told the cashier I had to replace the plumbing for my sink. "Water pipes?" She asked.

I replied, "The round tubes that liquid flows through."

πŸ‘οΈŽ 7
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/FinalCaveat
πŸ“…οΈŽ Mar 31 2020
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I realized I should post this before I lose my train of thought.
πŸ‘οΈŽ 1k
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Dankmonseiur69
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 15 2018
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What are banks used for?

To control the flow of the current sea

πŸ‘οΈŽ 12
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/shailertroy
πŸ“…οΈŽ Feb 10 2020
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Why couldn't the lifeguard save the hippie?

He was too far out, man.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 170
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/cancervixen831
πŸ“…οΈŽ Oct 21 2018
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how many sound engineers does it take to change a lightbulb?

one, two... one, two...

πŸ‘οΈŽ 1k
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/cobbywebby92
πŸ“…οΈŽ Nov 13 2015
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The rotation of the earth makes my day
πŸ‘οΈŽ 46
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/TH3C0SM1CM0NK3Y
πŸ“…οΈŽ Mar 06 2019
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My wife just got her breast pump going...

So my wife just got her breast pump all set up. She's got the double suckers rolling, tits out, milk flowing like a minor tributary. And I ASK "ARE YOU PUMPED?!" fucking genius.... She stared silently for like 10 seconds. Then told me to post here.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 94
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/JeremySTL
πŸ“…οΈŽ Apr 27 2019
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I will be a dad in a month. Is it required for me to tell these or brush up on my humor paradigm?
πŸ‘οΈŽ 7
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/lightningcrane31
πŸ“…οΈŽ Dec 20 2018
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Why do women only rap on their periods?

Because they have a mad flow.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 69
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/mattman8326
πŸ“…οΈŽ Sep 13 2019
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You can hear the blood flowing through your veins

if you listen varicosely.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 64
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/CheeseheadDave
πŸ“…οΈŽ Apr 14 2018
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If you water water

It grows 🌿

πŸ‘οΈŽ 9
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/AndytheMVP
πŸ“…οΈŽ Apr 29 2020
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Did you hear about the female rapper who only rapped when she was on her period?

They say she had a mean flow.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 101
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/safwan070
πŸ“…οΈŽ Feb 13 2019
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Did you hear about the female rapper that only battled while she was on her menstrual cycle?

They said she had a mean flow

πŸ‘οΈŽ 19
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/ThisEffinGuyz
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jun 03 2019
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