19 Hilarious Fist Puns - Punstoppable 🛑

What’s a fist that doesn’t hurt

A Pacifist

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👤︎ u/awesomehuder

📅︎ Jan 02 2021

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Why do beginner artist always forget to draw the stick figure’s thumb when they draw a fist?

They forgot the punchline

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👤︎ u/SleepyCrow07

📅︎ Oct 27 2020

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Today I took a single Cheerio from my son’s bowl, stared him in the eyes, placed it on the table, smashed it with my fist, and said “Watch out...”

“...cereal killer.”

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👤︎ u/VeryLastBison

📅︎ Oct 26 2020

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Two tradies were in a drunken fist fight over who's tools are who's.

Guess they were fighting tooth and nail over it.

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👤︎ u/MrToxicDwarf

📅︎ Aug 04 2020

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Son tied a fist toy to my fishing net

I dont get the punchline but he's smiling

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👤︎ u/ferkeshu

📅︎ Jun 11 2020

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I got in a fist fight with some movers and won

They were terrible boxers

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👤︎ u/dubeykeebler

📅︎ Jun 25 2020

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How do you beat a robot in a fist fight

Socket in the jaw

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👤︎ u/TheMightyBattleSquid

📅︎ Jan 12 2020

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What did the fist plate say to the second plate?

Dinners on me Edit: sry adopt the typo

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👤︎ u/coolman965

📅︎ Nov 28 2019

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My son got into a fist fight with his music teacher because he wrongly answered a question in his test. When he told me the story I just could say one thing...

"Son, violins is not the answer".

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👤︎ u/Dansowaru

📅︎ Nov 22 2019

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Two friends race each other. When they both finished, they fist bumped.

I guess you could say the finish line was also the punchline.

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👤︎ u/EOattheinternet

📅︎ Dec 06 2019

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What do they call fist bumps in the U.K.?

British Pounds

👍︎ 3k

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👤︎ u/Flandersmcj

📅︎ Dec 19 2016

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Me: Dad, Mum, I’m gay Dad: *clenches fists* Mum: Sweetie no do-

Dad: HI GAY, IM DAD!

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👤︎ u/MidoriMonki

📅︎ Oct 06 2019

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This is one my 7 year old son said to me... I had a closed fist up to my face with my little finger extended and picking food out of my teeth. My thumb was also extended out. He looked at me and with a smirk on his face said to me...

Who's on the phone dad?

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👤︎ u/Pearly351

📅︎ Mar 17 2019

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My ten year old fist bumps me and does the 'exploding hand' afterwards ...

After he explodes his hand I look down at my still clenched fist. I slowly raise it near my ear confused and shake it. I then explode it in my face almost knocking me off me feet. I look at him sternly and say, "You could have killed me."

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👤︎ u/Twisted_Logic

📅︎ Jun 25 2014

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They should make a spinoff show with Misty from Luke Cage and Colleen from Iron Fist.

Call it “Knight Wing”.

*My actual dad made that joke today.

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👤︎ u/darcizzle16

📅︎ Sep 16 2018

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Some days I need a whole fist of Wild Turkey.

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👤︎ u/Stretch_Aye

📅︎ Nov 26 2013

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Did you know if you punch someone with a lighter clench in your fist you will do less damage to the other person.

Because it is a lighter punch.

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👤︎ u/Spartan17492

📅︎ Dec 02 2016

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My dad got my mom earlier and then fist bumped me.

So my wisdom teeth have been coming in lately and my dad hit my mom with this one.

Dad: Yeah I've never had any wisdom teeth

Mom: Huh?!

Me: Some people don't get their wisdo-

Dad: ALL MY TEETH WERE STUPID TEETH!

While grinning like a maniac while my mom groaned.

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👤︎ u/Trigger_The_Dog

📅︎ Nov 15 2015

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Earned a fist bump for this one.

Went to McDonald's with some fellow students after TAFE was finished for the day (for those who don't know what TAFE is, I guess the most similar thing would be community college?), and somehow one of the girls ended getting crumbs on her hat: "How did they get there?!" "I guess it's just a crummy hat."

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👤︎ u/Clarrington

📅︎ Aug 05 2014

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